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  • >> Stephen: HEY, WELCOME BARK EVERYBODY.

  • I'M HERE WITH TY BURRELL FROM "MODERN FAMILY" AND

  • "DUNCANVILLE."

  • TY, I UNDERSTAND YOU WERE BORN IN A PRETTY SMALL TOWN CALLED

  • GRANTS PASS, OREGON, AND SPENT YOUR CHILDHOOD IN SMALL TOWNS

  • NEARBY.

  • WHAT WAS IT LIKE GROWING UP THERE?

  • >> IT'S A BEAUTIFUL AREA.

  • IT IS-- IT WAS LOGGING COUNTRY.

  • IT IS NOW WINE COUNTRY >> Stephen: WE LOVE SMALL TOWNS

  • ON THIS SHOW.

  • YOU KNOW THAT.

  • YOU WATCH THE SHOW EVERY NIGHT.

  • IN FACT, WE HAVE A SEGMENT THE SHOW CALLED "COMMUNITY

  • CALENDAR" WHERE WE HIGHLIGHT ACTUALUPCOMING EVENTS HAPPENING

  • IN SMALLER COMMUNITIES.

  • WOULD YOU MAYBE LIKE TO DO IT WITH ME?

  • >> WELL, STEPHEN-- >> Stephen: GREAT!

  • BECAUSE IT'S TIME FOR GRANTS PASS, OREGON'S COMMUNITY

  • CALENDAR!

  • ♪ ♪ ♪ ( APPLAUSE )

  • WELCOME TO COMMUNITY CALENDAR, YOUR SOURCE FOR WHAT'S HAPPENING

  • IN AND AROUND GRANTS PASS AND THE GREATER JOSEPHINE COUNTY

  • AREA.

  • JOINING ME IS NATIVE GRANTS PASSIAN, TY BURRELL.

  • >> THANKS, STEPHEN.

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) YOU KNOW WHAT WE SAY IN GRANTS

  • PASS, OREGON: IF YOU'RE GRANTED A CHANCE TO VISIT, DON'T PASS IT

  • UP.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: "ORE-GON-NA" REGRET

  • IT!

  • ( LAUGHTER ) SO HERE ARE SOME ACTUAL EVENTS

  • GOING ON THIS MONTH AROUND GRANTS PASS.

  • TOMORROW, HEAD OVER TO THE LINCOLN ROAD VETERINARY CLINIC

  • WHERE THEY'LL BE OFFERING NON-ANESTHETIC TEETH CLEANING

  • FOR DOGS, WHICH SHOULD LEAVE PLENTY OF ANESTHETIC FOR THE

  • VETS WHO GET THEIR FINGERS BITTEN OFF.

  • >> ON MARCH 7, HEAD TO THE JOSEPHINE COMMUNITY LIBRARY FOR

  • THEIR EVENT "TREATS FOR TEENS."

  • REMINDER: THIS EVENT IS INSIDE THE LIBRARY.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) IF SOMEONE IN THE PARKING LOT IS

  • OFFERING TREATS FOR TEENS, CALL THE POLICE.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: ARE YOU A MORNING

  • PERSON THAT LOVES SKEET SHOOTING?

  • >> WHO ISN'T, STEPHEN?

  • >> Stephen: WELL, THEN, ON MARCH 14, HEAD OVER TO ROGUE

  • VALLEY SPORTING CLAYS FOR THEIR "WAKEUP SHOOT."

  • FAR LESS CONTROVERSIAL THAN LAST YEAR'S EVENT, "SKEET SHOOTING

  • WHILE YOU SLEEP."

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> ON MARCH 14 AND 15, MAKE YOUR

  • WAY TO THE ROGUE CREAMERY FOR THE OREGON CHEESE FESTIVAL: AN

  • "EVENT CELEBRATING CHEESE AND EVERYTHING THAT GOES WITH IT."

  • SO, FARTS.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: ON MARCH 14 AT THE

  • JOSEPHINE COUNTY FAIRGROUNDS, IT'S THE "ENLIGHTENED LIVING

  • FAIRE" FEATURING REIKI, TAROT, ASTROLOGY, HYPNOTHERAPY, AND

  • ACUPUNCTURE.

  • AND REST ASSURED: "EVERY PERSON THAT OFFERS A PRODUCT OR

  • SERVICE HAS SUBMITTED TWO REFERENCES."

  • ( LAUGHTER ) SO DON'T YOU WORRY, THAT LADY

  • SHOVING NEEDLES IN YOUR FACE KNOWS AT LEAST TWO PEOPLE.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )

  • >> ON MARCH 13, AT THE VICE BREWING COMPANY, CHECK OUT THE

  • BABY MAMA DRAG SHOW.

  • ONE OF THE DRAG PERFORMERS IS EXPECTING, SO THEY'RE ASKING

  • FOR DONATIONS OF DIAPERS, WIPES, OR CLOTHES.

  • IT'S A GIRL!

  • YES, GIRLS' CLOTHES ONLY.

  • THE "BABY MAMA DRAG SHOW" IS VERY SERIOUS ABOUT TRADITIONAL

  • GENDER ROLES.

  • >> Stephen: HEAD OVER TO ALIBI TAVERN ON MARCH 8 FOR THE 2020

  • SOUTHERN OREGON BATTLE OF THE BANDS.

  • THIS YEAR'S LINEUP INCLUDES AUTOPILOT MISCREANTS, BEYOND THE

  • TIDE, AND DEATH PLANT.

  • TICKETS ARE JUST $5, AND KIDS 10 AND UNDER ARE FREE.

  • GREAT NEWS FOR ALL THOSE NINE-YEAR-OLD FANS OF "DEATH

  • PLANT."

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> ON MARCH 27 AND 28, THE RISE

  • AERIAL DANCE STUDIO PRESENTS "WOMEN RISING: A NIGHT OF CIRCUS

  • AND DANCE."

  • >> Stephen: SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT NIGHT OUT WITH THE KIDS.

  • >> I'M AFRAID NOT.

  • THIS CIRCUS INVOLVES BURLESQUE, SO IT'S ADULTS ONLY.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • BUT WILL THEY STILL BE COTTON CANDY?

  • >> OH, YES.

  • SHE'LL BE THERE.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )

  • >> Stephen: ON MARCH 21, GET READY FOR "DINE IN THE DARK"

  • WHERE YOU CAN ENJOY A FOUR-COURSE MEAL IN COMPLETE

  • DARKNESS!

  • FOR ADDED FUN, DINNER WILL BE SERVED AT ROGUE BARBERS

  • BARBERSHOP.

  • SO COME ON DOWN AND REACH FOR A FORK, ACCIDENTALLY GRAB THE

  • SCISSORS, STAB YOURSELF IN THE MOUTH, AND THEN DRINK A BOTTLE

  • OF BARBACIDE!

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> ON MARCH 22, BALDINI'S

  • RESTAURANT IS HOSTING A FUNDRAISER FOR THE HUMANE

  • SOCIETY CALLED THE "SPAYGHETTI" DINNER.

  • ALL PROCEEDS GO TO THE SPAY AND NEUTER PROGRAMS.

  • SO COME FOR THE SPAYGHETTI.

  • DON'T EAT THE MEATBALLS.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )

  • >> Stephen: WELL, THAT DOES IT FOR GRANTS PASS, OREGON'S

  • COMMUNITY CALENDAR.

  • >> AS WE LIKE TO SAY: WHO IS GRANT, AND WHAT IS HE PASSING?

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: WE'LL NEVER KNOW!

  • CHECK OUT "DUNCANVILLE" SUNDAY NIGHTS ON FOX!

  • TY BURRELL, EVERYBODY!

  • WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

>> Stephen: HEY, WELCOME BARK EVERYBODY.

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