Top 100 Things Guys Never Want To Hear.

1) You're like my best friend.

2) I still live with my ex.

3) I don't think I'm going to wear makeup anymore.

4) You're not gay?

Really?

5) Do you have any hot friends?

6) Have you seen my birth control?

I haven't taken that in weeks!

7) Honey the Bachelor's on!

8) Can you help me move next Saturday?

9) Do you want to watch The Notebook again?

10) Can you believe my last boyfriend put a restraining order on me?

11) You want to go shopping with me?

12) I feel like you don't even know me.

13) Are you done yet?

14) We should get matching tattoos!

15) He's kinda hot.

16) You think you could hook me up with him?

17) You're not even listening to me.

18) What did I just say?

19) I think we should make a joint Facebook account.

20) I was born a man.

21) We should get colonics!

22) People in this country bathe too much.

23) I haven't showered in a week.

24) I know we just met, but do you want to meet my parents tonight?

25) I think I broke your Xbox.

26) I'm not really in the mood tonight.

27) Can we just cuddle?

28) Do you know what today is? 29) Hey buddy.

30) I think I broke your GameStation...or whatever it's called.

31) I've only slept with 47 guys.

32) I think you're getting man boobs.

33) Umm...we can watch the game later.

34) House Hunters is on.

35) You made me realize I'm lesbian.

36) Technically, I'm still married...

37) ...but I mean...who really cares about that stuff anyways.

38) Do you think she's pretty?

39) Is she prettier than me?

40) If we broke up, would we still be friends?

41) I just don't like watching football.

42) Are we official?

43) I know we just met, but I think I love you.

44) What do you like about me?

45) We should go on a diet together!

46) I don't want to do this anymore.

47) Did you ever have abs?

48) You look a lot like my ex-boyfriend.

49) I think my parents are home.

50) I think I'm constipated.

51) Woo!

I'm so glad I had that sex change operation.

52) You want to go shopping with me?

53) I don't date guys shorter than me.

54) I'm on my period.

55) You want to come rub my belly?

56) I think my boyfriend's home.

57) Eww.

I don't date younger guys.

58) I think my husband's home.

59) Yeah, I don't really know how to cook.

60) I mean, I can cook like...Pop-tarts.

61) You're not bad-looking.

62) I wouldn't say you're good looking though...you know what I mean?

63) Guys should not be playing video games.

64) Grow up.

65) If we get married, I'm keeping my last name.

66) You left your email open last night.

67) You should take my last name!

68) Where have you been?

69) Do these look like herpes to you?

70) *Burp* 71) I'm actually really close with my ex.

72) Are you going bald?

73) No, it's ok.

I can drive the rest of the way.

74) You want to go to the opera tomorrow?

75) Notice anything different today?

76) I've had better.

77) The doctor said they weren't contagious.

78) Is it supposed to be green?

79) I went through your Facebook messages.

80) I have four children, but two of them have the same dad.

81) I'm really gassy.

Sorry!

82) Must be that Chipotle.

83) I just don't want to ruin our friendship by dating.

84) I'm pregnant...it's not yours.

85) We're going to be BFF's forever!

86) That's it?

87) Can you go to the store and buy me some tampons, please?

88) What did you call me?

That's not my name.

89) Does it bother you that I make more money than you?

90) I have a date tonight.

What should I wear?

91) Maybe we should date other people.

92) Awww.

You're so cute.

93) So like...what are we?

94) You know I'm thinking of cutting my hair really short.

95) Is your brother single?

96) Do I look fat?

Be honest.

97) Who are you texting?

98) I'm not really over 18.

99) I figured out the password to your phone.

100) We need to talk.

Leave a comment below.

What number was the funniest?

What Top 100 video should I make next?

I'm a grown man.

Do you ever workout?

Do you even lift?

Have you started?You should probably...