And welcome to a much requested video.

How I do my everyday vintage makeup.

An updated version from two years ago?

I'm gonna be showing you the products I normally use

and how I actually stick it on my face.

Also, it's kind of just an excuse

so I can play with the Besame new Sleeping Beauty Palette,

because have you seen it, it's beautiful.

Disclaimer, I am not a beauty channel

and if you've accidentally stumbled across this video,

thinking that I know things, I'm not a beauty guru,

please don't hold me in such high regard.

I hope it will be useful, and if not at least entertaining,

as I take you through this.

Because you know what's cute, this look.

You know what else is cute, fiscal responsibility.

Yes, that's right, I'm going to teach you some tips,

about how to be responsible with money

through the medium of a makeup video.

It's educational, it's fun and you're going to enjoy it.

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Like daily suntan lotion protects your face.

I mean, have you seen me? Im the color of a sheet

Yes, this is indeed an incredibly thick

50 SPF suntan lotion,

that normally one would put on the body,

and yes, I do put it on my face.

That was too much.

It's fine, I'll put it elsewhere on my person.

I just love using incredibly thick suntan lotion

as a primer, because I think it just does

good things to my skin.

And also my makeup just looks delightful

and really does stay in place.

Next up, foundation, and before I go any further,

I should also menton the fact that,

I know some of the brands I used are not cruelty-free,

it's MAC, I'm looking at you.

However I am transitioning all of my makeup

to being cruelty-free brands, because I have allergies,

and life is fun that way.

I basically have to make sure

that I don't put anything on my face

that will cause it to become bright red and bleeding a bit.

Allergies, they're fun.

If you also have eczema or skin

that really readily reacts to things,

please do leave me brand names down below

of things that you use and you found to be really helpful,

because I could really use the advice.

I have a slight issue when it comes to foundation,

that you may have realized just by looking at me,

which is that, my hands and my neck

are in no way the same color.

I love when people do the little patch test thing

on the hand of foundation and they're like,

yeah. Yeah, that matches.

Have you seen this?

Yes, my neck is rather yellow

and my hands are quite pinkish, as is my face.

It's 'cause I have thing called PoTS,

it's a condition where your blood just doesn't work,

you can find out more actual explanation in the card above.

So I take some kind of yellowy foundation,

and add in a bit of pink concealer

to attempt to make the shade of me.

For a really vintage look,

we're gonna go for a very full coverage.

You don't want anything, no tiny blemishes, no freckles,

although freckles actually can be quite cute and vintage.

Anyway, I don't have freckles to make cute.

(pleasant music)

And voila, I know, it looks slightly lighter,

because there is a massive light shining in my face.

But I promise you, it does genuinely match my neck.

So there you go, and remember, compare your face

to your neck, not your hands,

just like before you sign any new contract,

you should always use comparison websites.

Money saving tip, see, I told you so.

Time for concealer, because my face

wasn't pale enough as it was.

And it's also time to ask, what could you be concealing?

Is it your tax returns, if so, uh-oh,

time to get an accountant.

At the beginning it is very easy to file

your own tax returns, but as you continue,

oh gosh, do you need someone professional.

It may seem like an unnecessary expense,

but it really does help in the long run.

You don't want to get taken to court.

(pleasant lighthearted music)

All right, eye primer, now, if you like me,

have eyelids that go somewhere when you open our eyes,

I mean, can you see my eyelids, I can't.

They're not there.

Then you'll probably have also tried

every single eye primer under the sun,

and found that they don't.

The only thing that I found that works for my eyes,

is to use concealer and eye shadow,

but you have to put it on when the concealer's wet.

But this means I get to open, the Sleeping Beauty Palette.

[fairy dust sfx]

Based on the book that appears

in the original "Sleeping Beauty" film,

which apparently is huge and this is like

a teeny, tiny, version.

And there we go, I now apparently have the color

of Princess Aurora's legs on my eye.

You know what else has legs, the make-do and mend attitude.

Sometimes, it can actually be cheaper

to have your clothes altered or fixed by a tailor,

than it can to just actually buy new clothes.

Time for eyebrows, and oh yeah, I've got this far

without mentioning them, yeah, these are my eyebrows,

this is how they grow, I don't even pluck them,

it's just a, they just started falling out.

[music]

Vintage eyebrows are generally very thin,

quite, is full the word?

They don't tend to have gaps, that's full, right?

Yah, and always with a lovely arch, which...

We'll get to.

(bright bubbly music)

Yeah, that's as much at they grow,

so let's fake some niceness shall we.

I would advise that you follow your own brow bone,

but as my wife pointed out

in that wife does my makeup video,

you don't have a brow bone, it's just mushy really.

So I just go with, whatever shape I'm making that day.

I try and make it look the same.

I'm a big fan of the eyebrow pencil.

Both because it just sort of screams vintage to me,

but also because I don't have to learn

how to do that modern thing with the brush and the fade

and the front and you know.

Nic and easy, is how I like to keep my makeup.

You know what's nice and easy, using this eyebrow pencil.

You know what else is easy?

Making a free appointment with your bank

to discuss how to raise your credit score.

In some countries, England, getting a credit card,

buying some stuff and paying it off fairly quickly,

raises your credit score.

However, in other countries apparently

that's not a good thing to do.

Basically, don't read any advice online.

Irony.

Go to your bank because they actually know stuff shockingly.

Back to eyeshadow and I've decided to go with,

wait, where are her eyebrows?

Brows, Dust 107.

Wait, I changed my mind, I then swatched the White 107

and decided that actually, that's really gorgeous,

it's the skirt of her peasant costume.

Thanks to my lovely little monolids,

I find that the easiest way to put eyeshadow on

in a very precise, quite vintagey way,

is to use a very small angled brush first,

and then a better blending brush to blend it out.

You want to concentrate most of your shadow

on the outer eye.

And then with the delightfully fluffy blending brush,

just blend that all out.

[music]

Alright, we're then gonna put even more

eyeshadow on my face.

This time from this lovely Sleek palette

that I have used quite a lot.

And as you can see this is my favorite.

Gonna be very careful, precise, neat and blend afterwards.

Using an arch as we go up.

Trying to find the kind of natural curve of your eyeball.

Don't worry if it looks really really messy, life is messy.

Life lessons with Jessica, it's going well.

All right, now we've outlined our eyeballs, time to blend.

(bright lively music)

Moving onto eyeliner, the only one I have found

that is really actually waterproof enough

to stick to my eyelids.

So this is really fun,

because I'm very blind in my left eye.

So I have to be able to see over my nose

with just my right eye, and it's a big nose.

You know what else is a big no?

Having a really drafty house,

because it's terrible for your energy bills.

You can buy really cheap insulation kits online,

you don't have to replace your entire window,

it's a really cost effective way of keeping down the price.

Moving on to mascara, this one is a real favorite of mine,

because the wand bends and that just makes it

so much easier, in my mind, to use.

All right, eyes done, time to move on

to that little rosy glow that your cheeks can give you.

[music]

So after I've blushed under the apple of my cheekbone,

I then tend to push down with a lighter powder on top of it,

just to give it a nice little blend,

so we have no sharp lines.

Yeah, I'm just bashing myself in the face, I know, I know.

You know what else will bash you in the face,

the tax man.

If you're self-employed,

remember to have a separate bank account for your tax money.

And just put 1/3 of all of your earnings in there.

And don't touch it ever, ever, ever, ever,

ever, ever, ever, ever.

Unless there's an impending zombie apocalypse,