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  • MARK MALKOFF: Hi, I'm Mark Malkoff.

  • We're here in front of the Apple Store, one of the most

  • popular destinations here in the city and around the world.

  • Recently, I have noticed that the Apple Store allows

  • customers to do things you could never do in any other

  • big, brand name store.

  • Some of these include the hundreds of online videos of

  • customers dancing and singing freely in the

  • middle of the stores.

  • You can even bring in house pets.

  • I have even heard unconfirmed reports of people bringing in

  • parrots, even snakes.

  • My question, is there a limit to what the

  • Apple Store will allow?

  • I really want to know.

  • [MUSIC PLAYING]

  • MARK MALKOFF: To start off, I wanted to see if the Apple

  • Store would allow me to have a pizza delivered.

  • [ITALIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

  • MARK MALKOFF: Hey, I was wondering if I could get a

  • pizza delivered, a large pizza.

  • That's great.

  • I'm at the Apple Store, and I'm on the second floor.

  • I'm wearing a green shirt.

  • [ITALIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

  • MARK MALKOFF: Oh, awesome.

  • MALE SPEAKER: Did you just have a pizza

  • delivered to the floor?

  • MARK MALKOFF: Yeah.

  • MALE SPEAKER: That's awesome.

  • MARK MALKOFF: Do you want a slice?

  • MALE SPEAKER: No, thank you.

  • MARK MALKOFF: Are you sure?

  • MALE SPEAKER: I'm positive.

  • I just ate lunch.

  • MARK MALKOFF: It's really hot.

  • Would they allow me to have a romantic date with my

  • extremely tall wife?

  • Isn't this romantic?

  • This is just like in being at Le Cirque.

  • Oh, thank you.

  • Where's the forks?

  • Do you have the forks?

  • [CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]

  • MARK MALKOFF: I love you so much.

  • [TROMBONE PLAYING]

  • MARK MALKOFF: Is it possible to dim the lights at all?

  • We're on a romantic date.

  • MALE SPEAKER 2: Sorry, guys.

  • MARK MALKOFF: Could I get an Apple Store employee to help

  • fix my broken iPhone while dressed as the most evil man

  • in the universe?

  • [BREATHING SOUNDS]

  • MARK MALKOFF: Oh, hi.

  • My iPhone is broken.

  • I was wondering if you could be of assistance?

  • MALE SPEAKER 3: OK.

  • MALE SPEAKER 4: Do you have an appointment?

  • MARK MALKOFF: My iPhone broke.

  • MALE SPEAKER 5: Use the force.

  • And what's your email, Darth?

  • MARK MALKOFF: Darthvader24@gmail.

  • MALE SPEAKER 5: What is it?

  • MARK MALKOFF: Darthvader24@gmail.

  • I used to be with Hotmail.

  • Darth Vader gives hugs.

  • And finally, we all know the Apple Store will allow a dog,

  • but how about a goat?

  • MARK MALKOFF: How's it going?

  • Do you have any grass for my goat?

  • No grass?

  • OK, just wondering.

  • Do you think that the goat is a Mac or a PC?

  • He's a Mac?

MARK MALKOFF: Hi, I'm Mark Malkoff.

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