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  • >> WE'VE GOT A LOT TO GET THROUGH SO STICK TO THE SCRIPT

  • AND REMEMBER WHAT WE SAID, LET THE THOUGHTS FORM IN YOUR BRAIN

  • FIRST.

  • >> SMALL BUSINESSES KEEP MILLIONS OF WORKERS ON THE

  • PAYROLL.

  • >> SPOKEN TO NUMEROUS LEADERS OF COUNTRIES.

  • >> SPOKEN TO NUMEROUS LEADERS OF COUNTRIES OVER THE LAST 48 HOURS

  • AND THEY'RE SAYING -- >> THERE'S MUCH WORK TO BE DONE.

  • WE'RE LEADING THE WAY.

  • HAT.

  • E'RE LEADING THE WAY.

  • NO WE'RE NOT.

  • SO MANY DIFFERENT WAYS.

  • NOT EVEN ONE LITTLE WAY.

  • CAN YOU GET BILL BRYAN UP HERE BEFORE YOU PRESENT YOURSELF A

  • BIG MEDAL?

  • >> THANK YOU, MR. PRESIDENT, FOR THE OPPORTUNITY TO DO THIS.

  • I LEAD THE DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY.

  • >> BILL'S TALKING.

  • FINE.

  • FINE.

  • >> THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

  • MR. BRYAN -- -- A QUESTION THAT PROBABLY

  • SOME OF YOU ARE THINKING OF -- >> HELLO.

  • HELLO.

  • IS THAT MINE?

  • YEAH, IS THAT CHICKEN AND PASSION FRUIT SORBET?

  • BRILLIANT.

  • THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

  • >> SO SUPPOSING WE HIT THE BODY WITH A TREMENDOUS -- WHETHER

  • IT'S ULTRAVIOLET OR JUST VERY POWERFUL LIGHT --

  • >> WHERE DID BILL GO?

  • WHAT'S HAPPENING?

  • WHY ARE YOU TALKING AGAIN?

  • WHAT DID I MISS?

  • >> AND I THINK YOU SAID THAT HASN'T BEEN CHECKED BUT YOU'RE

  • GOING TO TEST IT.

  • >> TEST WHAT?

  • AND THEN I SAID SUPPOSE YOU BROUGHT THE LIGHT INSIDE YOUR

  • BODY.

  • >> WHAT.

  • THROUGH THE SKIN.

  • CAN WE RECAP LATELE?

  • AND THEN I SEE THE DISINFECTANT.

  • >> IF I WALK INTO A PARALLEL UNIVERSE WHAT TIME IS THIS?

  • >> WHERE IT KNOCKS IT OUT IN ONE MINUTE AND IS THERE A WAY WE

  • COULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

  • >> SOMETHING LIKE WHAT?

  • BY INJECTION INSIDE OR ALMOST A CLEANING BECAUSE YOU SEE IT

  • GETS IN THE LUNGS AND IT DOES A TREMENDOUS NUMBER ON THE LUNGS,

  • SO IT WOULD BE INTERESTING TO CECK THAT.

  • >> OKAY, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO BACKTRACK FOR ME HERE.

  • AT WHAT POINT DID WE START TALKING ABOUT AMERICANS

  • INJECTING THEMSELVES WITH BLEACH AS A CURE.

  • IS THIS A FEVER DREAM I'M HAVING.

  • >> YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO USE MEDICAL DOCTORS.

  • >> IF YOU'RE GOING TO POISON YOURSELF WITH CLEANER, YES,

  • MEDICAL DOCTORS ARE THE BEST KIND.

  • >> AND THE LIGHT IT GOES AWAY IN ONE MINUTE.

  • >> ON SURFACES, NOT ON HUMAN SKIN YOU DANGEROUS IF PUFFIN.

  • >> I WOULD LIKE YOU TO SPEAK WITH THE MEDICAL DOCTORS.

  • >> JUST SAY "DOCTORS," SAVES TIME WE'LLLE NEED TO DRIVE TO

  • THE HOSPITAL AFTER WE DRINK OUR BLEACH MARTINIS.

  • >> TO SEE IF THERE'S ANYWAY YOU CAN APPLY --

  • >> OH, GOD, WHAT?

  • -- LIGHT AND HEAT TO CURE -- OH, MY FLIPIN' FISH!

  • YOU ARE SO LETHALLY IGNORANT IT'S LIKE TALKING TO A

  • THREE-YEAR-OLD WITH A BLOW TORCH.

  • >> IF YOU COULD.

  • YOU CAN'T.

  • MAYBE YOU CAN, MAYBE YOU CAN'T.

  • >> YOU CAN'T.

  • I SAY MAYBE YOU CAN, MAYBE YOU CAN'T.

  • >> YOU CAN'T!

  • I'M NOT A DOCTOR.

  • I'M LIKE -- >> LIKE WHAT?

  • AN EXCITED MAN CHILD THAT THINKS LABORATORIES CAN DISPENSE CURES

  • LIKE VEND MACHINES?

  • I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU, VIRUS TREATMENTS ARE NOT KIT KATS.

  • >> A PERSON WHO HAS A GOOD YOU KNOW WHAT --

  • >> NO, I DON'T KNOW WHAT.

  • I'VE GOT NO IDEA ABOUT ANYTHING ANYMORE.

>> WE'VE GOT A LOT TO GET THROUGH SO STICK TO THE SCRIPT

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