(animal whimper)

(chill hip hop music)

(cat purring)

- Aw yeah.

Aw.

Oh so many purrs.

You're such a perfect kitty.

(horn blows)

- Ha, good joke Mom.

Purrfect.

Hey guys, Meemers here.

So I'm doing okay, Mom and Dad did bring me,

(funny licking sounds)

to Canada.

They did have to do tons of quarantine stuff

to get me in and out of the country but they did it,

and I don't know what it's for because I'm a cat.

So I don't know what planes are

and I don't know what countries mean.

It was really strange.

I was on this thing, it was loud.

And it was like 18 hours and no one would let me poop

and no one gave me water and I'm just happy to be home.

- Good morning everyone. It's like 7 am in Tokyo.

And we are heading to get some breakfast.

We're super jet lagged.

It's what we usually do is we go for Sukiya

and Simon is pretty tired.

- Hey, my gosh how do I do this thing again?

So I think we're supposed to press the record button

and then I talk to this machine as if it's a person.

Hello people that are watching our videos.

It's been a very long time since we've done something.

We've had a good recovery and I think now

we're ready to eat some Japanese food.

- [Martina] This is really neat.

I've never seen anybody refill--

Cool.

- Oh this is cool.

- [Martina] Right? (cow groans)

- Am I allowed to look here?

- [Martina] I don't know, it's so cool.

Okay let's go and get some food

- Yeah food, I got distracted.

- [Martina] I wanted to show you guys

(cow groans)

these cool stickers.

I have not shared this with you guys.

But I actually go around collecting all these stickers.

I take photos of them.

Yeah that's right, stop police brutality.

- [Simon] I had to stop here

(cow groans) on the way to food.

Because one person has littered

and left all their soy milk here.

But who drinks three soy milks in a row?

- [Martina] This is our traditional Sukiya.

We used to live right down that street

when we first moved to Japan, to Kichijoji.

and then we came across here

and it was our very first Sukiya.

Okay, we're heading on in.

Choices.

Hot pot with noodles. Gyudon bowls you guys already know

because we did a Sukiya video on it.

And if you don't know it then you need to go.

Okay, I think I'm gonna do--

(grunting)

Feeling pretty tired to film without eating food huh?

- I, it's--

- [Martina] You never really shared that with anybody before

about like, we've talked about some of the struggles

but you should tell people,

like seriously, you know it's tough.

- Yeah, I thought that I'd just be able to come in here,

start filming and talking

but I haven't eaten in a very long time.

And I think I'm just too big to go that long without eating.

- [Martina] You're like a dinosaur.

- I am a very big boy and I just,

I'm all fuzzy and confused and jet lagged.

- [Martina] And fuzzy.

- And aroused.

- [Martina] Um, what? - Uh.

- So for 2020 we're trying out some new stuff.

We're trying to be more honest with ourselves

and the abilities that we have.

And one of the big things I know that we struggle with

is like, for example, I am definitely getting sicker.

But, I have to accept it

and figure out some of my limits.

So, we're going to try to do more videos that

don't involve me being completely wrecked, exhausted.

Which turns into me not putting up the video at all.

I'd rather put up some videos and share with you guys,

if we have some more comfortable limits on how to film.

So I'm hoping we'll be able to film

more naturally when we head out.

And that, it will be more like

stuff that's happening around our neighborhood and Tokyo.

And it will be kind of like, not day in the life,

but you will be able to see real Japan life.

And we'll also have some more organized videos

as well, right?

- And what's real Japanese life right now is

coming to Sukiya when you're jet lagged

and eating beside the dude that's totally passed out.

- [Martina] Yeah, I don't blame him.

- Hot tip if you're coming to Japan,

and you have no where to sleep.

Go eat at a Sukiya and take a nap.

Oh here come the (speaking Japanese) in the distance.

Sugoi!

(people speaking Japanese)

We've been living in Asia for 12 years now

and after spending one month in Canada without rice,

I damn near lost my mind.

Rice is very important, all right?

I've changed. No rice, no life.

- [Martina] Seaweed,

Oh ya, Onsen Tamago.

- [Simon] Oh yeah.

- [Martina] I missed that.

Oh yeah.

Do they have a low shoyu you here? (speaking Japanese)

(speaking Japanese)

(repeating mmms)

(chews loudly)

(punches land)

- [Simon] What is this in the top left corner?

- [Martina] I had to stop a second

because I think this is a rotary telephone.

Thomas the Tank Engine, the Christmas edition.

We got, oh, we got Gremlins. We got Ultraman, Anpanman,

And of course, Marvel.

♪ The best. It's Loki and I love him ♪

♪ and you can't tell me otherwise. ♪

- Wow!

- [Martina] I kind of feel like,

I need to have a rotary telephone thing.

- I mean, how could you not have one?

- [Martina] I'm going to resist it because it's dumb!

- I do think the younger generation--

- Yes. Doesn't know what it is.

- Has not felt the satisfaction of dialing a rotary phone.

It was a very good feeling wasn't it?

- Not only was it a good feeling,

it helped us remember our phone numbers.

So, when Jackie came back to Toronto,

She goes, Oh I'll just call her house.

Luckily, I know her phone number off heart.

And I'm like, yeah, I know your phone number off heart.

I know your phone number off heart too.

I mean in Pickering,

and your phone number here too don't worry.

- Do you know my phone number here?

- Yes.

- Tell me.

- I'm going to whisper into your ear.

- Okay whisper it.

- Hang on.

- Heads up, these are all external mics,

they're still going to hear us.

- Shit, I forgot. I'm just going to mouth it,

I'm not going to say it out loud.

(whispering)

- That was a lucky guess. That was a lucky guess.

- How was it a lucky guess?

There are so many digits

to a Japanese phone number.

- There are 11 and--

- One, two, three,

four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

11 phone numbers, numbers to remember.

It's complicated y'all.

- [Simon] Yarg. This be the Cafe and salon for pirates.

- Yarg matey.

We'll give you a coffee and then kick ya off the plank,

ya limey bastard.

That felt very piratey.

- [Simon] You got it there girl.

Aw, a little doggy.

- [Martina] (gasp) So nice! I like it.

- [Simon] Yeah, yeah eh. Little doggy statue.

- Just like my fairy garden.

- [Simon] That's true!

- If people look carefully,

they'd see thousands of tiny creatures staring out at them

from my bushes. (laughing)

- [Simon] Hey, when are you going to clean your garden?

- Okay, listen, look, okay, hello, oh he's following me.

(dramatic horror music)

- Ah, he's still there!

He's catching up!

- [Simon] Hey, that's a nice bag you got girl.

- Thanks, I made it.

That tuckered me out. What I'm hoping to do

is take everything off my garden ledge.

I'm going to clean it all.

I got some brushes for cleaning

and I'm going to have to water. (door creaking)

- [Simon] Shut it bird.

- That's the bird that used to sit outside our window

and scream at us every morning.

I'll be honest, we're a little bit behind schedule

because normally we come to the park at like four, five AM

and the sun rises, and we see all the old people

doing their amazing exercises.

They do like an (counts in japanese) and it's really neat.

But it's so cold we decided to stay at home

and snuggle in our giant blanket robes.

(both laughing)

This hurts my ankles.

You see this sign?

- [Simon] Walk your bicycle.

It is very dangerous to ride on your bicycle here.

- I always take my bicycle down this ramp.

- [Simon] Same!

- I come all the way down and I just,

keep it braked of course, but you like roll down super--

- [Simon] You keep yours braked?

- Yeah you don't want to go whoa

- [Simon] Not me.

- (Speaking Japanese) Come on.

(ducks quack)

- All these ducks are just going like

(tongue clicks) and appearing in the lake.

(gasps) I cannot emphasize enough

how much fun Inokashira Coen, I mean Inokashira Park is.

Because you come here and sometimes you think you're alone,

and then you look over and there's people

wearing duck wadding things, and they're in the bushes

and they've got like their cameras out.

Or there's people sketching.

It's filled with, it's brimming with wild life.

(soft piano music)

Is that a puppers on a special--

- [Simon] Oh my gosh what is this wonderful, magic?

Two, big doggies.

Oh look at the white snout on that one!

- [Martina] Oh and the old boy.

Oh I love it.

- [Simon] Oh my god.

- [Martina] Oh, he took them out.

That's so nice.

- [Simon] Oh what a nice doggy.

- [Simon & Martina] (Speaking Japanese)

- [Martina] It says I'm so happy.

Because of course they're goldens!

- [Simon] Yeah!

That doggy such an old doggy.

They're just giving, they're letting that doggy

have some last walks.

That's real sad.

- It's so nice though that they're doing that!

- [Simon] Yeah. That they're doing that.

That they got the little wheelbarrow for their doggy.

- Yeah. Too soon. - [Simon] Too soon.

- It's not that soon that I can't look at it.

Can we go over my favorite bridge?