That would be me.

And do you know why?

Because I eat everything with a knife and fork.

Literally everything.

You name it.

I eat it with a knife and fork.

The answer is yes.

Right now, wherever you are.

If you're screaming out options at me, the answer is yes.

I eat pizza with a knife and fork.

I eat wings with a knife and fork.

I eat sandwiches with a knife and fork.

I eat everything.

Hamburgers with a knife and fork.

For exactly that reason, I don't like to get things on the fingers.

I don't like it.

I'm not as worried about it.

Getting in my eyes.

I don't like the one might.

When your fingers smell after you eat something, you get mustard on there.

Or ketchup or whatever it might be literally anything.

I don't like the feeling of it.

I also don't like my disgusting kating hands touching the food that I'm then eating at any time.

I was germophobe chi didn't need a pandemic to be a germophobe, so I don't like any of that So, Coach Nolan, listen to me.

The defense is struggling.

I can't help you with that.

I don't know what you're what you're 34 should be morphing into.

I don't know why you're linebackers air struggling as they are.

I don't know why you can't cover.

I don't know why you're not getting to the quarterback.

I can't help you with any of those things.

But the Tabasco on the finger.

I can solve that problem like that.

Knife and fork for everything, my friend.

Trust me, it works.

People are asking me.

How about a cookie?

Yes.

I eat a cookie with a knife and fork if it can't be eaten with a knife and fork.

I'm not interested in eating the cookie.

People are asking sandwiches.

Yes, Reese is Yes.

I will eat a Reeses with a knife and fork.

Throw one at me.

Go ahead, E.

Even like pizza with a knife and a fork.

Like I don't.

You have 100% like a chicken wing or something like Are you taking out a knife and fork?

And from someone you like?

Not fun.

You don't find that odd at all now I don't.

I find myself e I find it.

Have you ever had, like Eminem's or Skittles or anything of that nature?

Because you can't Yes, in my life, yes.

But generally, no.

And if I schedules, I don't particularly care for the Eminem's.

I used to like a little bit.

And if I were to eat them now, I would probably eat them with some sort of protective device.

Like I might have a napkin or something like that to use to eat them with.

But I'm not going to get them on the fingers.

I don't like any.

I don't like food.

I'm just loving how shocked everyone is because I mean this.

This is just, you know, I've known this for 15 years now.

E for Bubba, this is only home week.

John Passman wrote me Are you telling tweeted at me?

Are you telling me you ate Buffalo Joe's with a fork and knife?

Yes, I did.

Friends.

Buffalo Joe's is the wing place in Evanston.

Delicious.

I ate there.

I probably ate there.

I swear to you, I'm not exaggerating.

I 88 meals a week there.

How long have you been doing this?

For?

How long you been doing the four spoon thing for everything like you've even in your lifetime.

Most of my life, I would say certainly all of my adult life and probably e not as a child.

I'm not sure exactly when this affliction sort of came over me, but for a very long time now, a very long time.

I do not eat things with my hands.

I don't like it.

I don't like the way it feels.

I don't like anything about it.

A from your wife when she saw you pull out a knife and a fork when you're about to eat a slice of pizza, well, you'd have to ask her, Um, but this may have started in Chicago because pizza is very different in Chicago.

So I grew up in New York until I'm 18 and then I moved to Chicago for 11 years.

Now, as you probably know, pizza, it does not.

It's not the same entity.

It's not the same food.

When people ask me, Do you prefer New York style pizza?

Chicago style pizza?

I always say they aren't comparable to me just because they have the same name.

They're completely different.

Foods, New York style Pizza is a slice and you fold it and eat it with, you know, with you can eat it with a couple of napkins if you have enough napkins, if I'm forced to hand eat a slight of a slice of pizza so long as there was enough napkin re, then I'm generally okay.

But there's it requires significant napkin re in order for that to be an option.

But if a fork and knife is an option, it's always preferable.

What was Stasis?

Reaction?

Look on the list of things that I think she's concerned about.

This is so low, you know?

I mean, Dale tweets at me.

We doughnuts with a fork.

Really?

Yes, I do.

I eat doughnuts with a fork.

Tim, Do you eat chips with silverware?

Tim.

I don't eat chips.

Don't care for chips.

Not a big chip thing again.

Snap says to me, I want to see you eat wings.

Let's go eat some wings.

I love wings.

Wings are my weakness.

Ask anyone who eats with me.

I went all over.

I eat nothing but wings on golf trips, which is when I allow myself to eat whatever I want with no rules.

Ask any of the guys in my golf trips.

They will tell you I eat the wings with a fork and knife.

Always.

Um, there was one other one in here.

Tacos.

Greedy.

How do you eat a taco with a fork and knife?

Very easily.

I only eat the soft tacos.

I don't like the hard tacos anyway.

You know the crunchy, the crunchy shell tacos they get all over the place.

It's not easy to eat.

It's almost impossible to eat with a knife and fork, which is why I don't do it.

I like the soft shell tacos and those air easy to eat with a knife and fork.

I don't know why people think I'm kidding.

I've been telling you this for years.