(CHOIR SINGING)

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas, one and all!

Ho! Ho! Ho!

(MOOING)

(SHUSHING)

(BRAYING)

(SHUSHING)

(COUGHS)

(SHUSHING)

(IMITATING MARCHING BAND)

(SHUSHING)

(IMITATING BAND SOFTLY)

(BLEATING)

(WHISTLES)

(BARKING)

(IMITATING BEEPING)

(BARKING)

(BLEATING)

(IMITATING ROBOT)

(GROWLING SOFTLY)

(EXCLAIMS)

(CONTINUES SNARLING)

(GROWLING)

(VOCALISING CINEMATIC TUNE)

(IMITATING EXPLOSIONS)

(GROWLING)

Exterminate! Exterminate!

(IMITATING HELICOPTER ENGINE)

(MAN CLEARS THROAT)

(BAND PLAYING HARK THE HERALD ANGELS SING)

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!

(GRUNTS)

(GROANING)

(CHUCKLES)

Bauble.

Bless you, my son. I'll just put this in my car.

Okay.

Would you... Would you... You know.

(BAND PLAYS ONE NOTE)

(BAND PLAYS TWO NOTES)

(BAND PLAYING QUICKLY)

(BAND PLAYS ONE NOTE)

(PLAYING GOD REST YE MERRY GENTLEMEN QUICKLY)

(BAND PLAYING GOD REST YE MERRY GENTLEMEN)

(MUSIC STOPS)

(MUSICIAN PLAYS ONE NOTE)

(BAND PLAYING SLOWLY)

(VOLUME INCREASING)

(MUSIC STOPS)

(MUSIC RESUMES)

(MUSICIANS HOLDING NOTE)

(MUSIC RESUMES)

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

(BAND PLAYING JAZZY VERSION OF GOD REST YE MERRY GENTLEMEN)

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

(BAND PLAYING SILENT NIGHT)

Oh!

(EXCLAIMS IN SURPRISE)

(HUMMING)

There we go.

(MEOWS)

Cheers.

(GUN FIRING ON TV)

MAN ON TV: That was for my brother! That was for my sister!

(EXPLOSIONS ON TV)

(GIRL SCREAMING ON TV)

(SIGHS)

KIDS: (SINGING) Away in a manger

No crib for a bed

The little Lord Jesus

Laid down his sweet head

The stars in the bright sky

Looked down where he lay

The little Lord Jesus

Asleep on the hay

The cattle are lowing

The baby awakes

But little Lord Jesus

No crying he makes

I love thee, Lord Jesus

Look down from the sky

And stay by my bedside

Till morning is nigh

(CHURCH BELLS RINGING)

Look, Teddy.

What's Santa Claus brought you? Let's see.

Oh!

There we go.

Yes, three!

(EXCLAIMS IN JOY)

Christmas socks!

Merry Christmas!

Look!

Boom!

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Are you all right in there?

Yes, fine, thank you.

-Oh, sorry, just drying my hair. -Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to you.

-MR BEAN: Cup of tea? -Oh, yes. If you're having one.

Well, I might.

You got the turkey on?

-Do you want a hand? -No, no. Thank you.

(SCREAMS)

(IRMA GOBB GRUNTING)

(CRASHING)

(EXCLAIMS) My present!

Oh, look!

A Classic Ship.

Look at that.

It's just lovely.

Look at all these bits and stuff. Look at all those guns.

Oh!

I've got it here. There.

It's got this...

It's got this cardboard thing on the back, so it can stand there,

or it can stand there,

or it can even stand just here. You see? Brilliant.

Isn't it brilliant?

(CRYING)

No, don't... Don't cry. But...

Oh. I forgot the main bit. There.

(EXCLAIMING)

It hooks onto here, you see?

(DOOR SLAMS)

What's wrong with it?

Oh. You forgot...

Merry Christmas, Mr Bean.

(CRACKER EXPLODES)