I really dio I feel like when I take a shower, it's an accomplishment and it deserves to be recognized as such.

我真的dio我覺得當我洗澡的時候，這是一種成就，它值得被認可。

And the award goes to a Khanna.

而這個獎要頒給一個Khanna。

Oh, my God.

哦，我的上帝。

Thank you so much.

非常感謝你。

E wanna thank I wanna think myself for having the strength to shower.

我想感謝我自己能有力氣洗澡。

You know, once every week I want to thank my best friends, of course, who congratulate me every time that I dio, um I want to thank my hair for really, really persevering in the face of meeting half of the bottle of condition art.

你知道，每週一次，我想感謝我最好的朋友，當然，他們祝賀我每一次，我dio，嗯，我想感謝我的頭髮真的，真的堅持不懈地在面對一半的條件藝術瓶。

Thank you.

謝謝你了

All the music coming on.

所有的音樂都在響起。

Okay.

好吧，我知道了

Thank you so much.

非常感謝你。

Thank you.

謝謝你了

Way quarantine hasn't exactly been encouraging in this regard.

方式檢疫在這方面並沒有完全令人鼓舞。

Actually, the only thing that saved my sanity has been driving to remote locations and just screaming into the abyss.

事實上，唯一能拯救我的理智的，就是開車去偏遠的地方，然後對著深淵大喊大叫。

CNN just reported that Rana could limit a man's semen even after he's recovered.

美國有線電視新聞網（CNN）剛剛報道說，拉納可以限制一個男人的精液，即使在他康復後。

That is devastating.

這是毀滅性的。

E digress.

而離題。

What I'm here to talk about today are bids for connection.

今天我在這裡要講的是連接的競價。

So I first heard this term from John Gottman, who is most known for his book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.

所以我第一次聽到這個詞是從約翰-戈特曼那裡聽到的，他最著名的書是《讓婚姻成功的七大原則》。

A bid for connection is a small thing.

競標連接是一件小事。

It could be verbal or non verbal that someone does to connect.

可以是口頭的，也可以是非口頭的，有人做的連接。

Think of it as an emotional call.

就當是一種情感的呼喚吧。

How often the call is answered or not makes up the healthiness and the happiness of their relationship.

電話的接聽頻率與否，構成了他們關係的健康與幸福。

This is the 100th time you called me today, and you've picked up 100 times.

這是你今天給我打的第100次電話，你已經接了100次。

Yea by she loves me.

是的，她愛我。

So, according to Gottman, the one factor that makes for a successful relationship is that couples pay attention to each other.

所以，哥特曼認為，夫妻關係成功的一個因素就是夫妻之間互相關注。

This is a very simple factor, but life often gets in the way, right?

這是個很簡單的因素，但生活往往會妨礙到你，對吧？

Sometimes we take people for granted.

有時候，我們把人當成了理所當然。

We look at our phones when they're talking to us.

我們看手機的時候，他們在跟我們說話。

We hear them side, but we don't want to delve into what's weighing on their minds.

我們聽到了他們的一面之詞，但我們不想深入瞭解他們心中的重擔。

They want pets, but we really want to get our work done.

他們想養寵物，但我們真的想把工作做好。

The easiest way to improve your relationships is to pay attention during life's everyday moments.

改善人際關係最簡單的方法就是在生活的日常時刻注意。

Bids are short and small and simple, but they're frequent.

競標時間短，規模小，簡單，但頻率高。

Gottman reported that during a 10 minute dinner, we can make over 100 bids and meeting them.

哥特曼報告說，在10分鐘的晚餐中，我們可以做100多個投標，並滿足他們。

More often than not, it's crucial, and Gottman would know he can predict, with 94% accuracy which couples will stay together or end in divorce.

更多的時候，這是至關重要的，戈特曼會知道他能以94%的準確率預測哪些夫妻會繼續在一起或者以離婚收場。

Everyone look under your seats.

大家看下你們的座位。

You get a relationship, you'll get a relationship.

你有關係，就會有關係。

You get a divorce, Theo.

你去離婚吧，西奧

Now there's three ways to respond to a bid, and only one of them furthers connection.

現在有三種方式響應競價，只有一種方式可以進一步聯繫。

Say that the person who is putting out a bid is simply asking you something.

說出價的人只是在問你一些事情。

Like, what's the WiFi password?

比如，WiFi密碼是什麼？

Mm, it's Mm hmm.

Mm, it's Mm hmm.

Hm.

Hm.

What's the WiFi password?

WiFi密碼是什麼？

What do you want to know?

你想知道什麼？

What the WiFi password is?

WiFi密碼是什麼？

Why wouldn't I want to connect the WiFi?

為什麼我不想連接WiFi？

I don't want to use up all my data.

我不想用完我所有的數據。

Yeah, okay.

是啊，好吧。

It's pretty pretty city in a very boxy but thanks.

在一個很框的城市裡，這是相當漂亮的城市，但謝謝。

Showing up for these moments day today is something I definitely wanna be more conscious of.

今天出現在這些時刻的日子裡，我一定要更加註意。

Moving forward, not just partners, but friends, family, my cats.

往前走，不僅僅是合作伙伴，還有朋友、家人、我的貓咪。

Because I know I could get hella distracted.

因為我知道，我可能會得到地獄分心。

And I know what it feels like to really want to connect with someone and be ignored or worse.

我知道那種感覺是什麼，真的想與人交流，卻被人忽視或更糟。

Met with some kind of aggressive resistance.

遭到了某種積極的抵抗。

Speaking of connection, thank you to Nord VPN for sponsoring today's video.

說到連接，感謝Nord VPN對今天視頻的贊助。

I'm a frequent user of VPNs, especially when I'm working in other countries and I can't access Netflix.

我經常使用VPN，特別是當我在其他國家工作時，我無法訪問Netflix。

Who?

誰？

Lou or any of my other favorite entertainment platforms, Nord VPN, allows you to access all of your favorite sites, no matter where in the world.

盧或我最喜歡的任何其他娛樂平臺，Nord VPN，允許你訪問所有你最喜歡的網站，無論在世界的任何地方。

You might be it even Dun Dun Dun works in China.

你可能是它甚至鄧鄧在中國工作。

Impressed.

印象深刻。

So, um, I you can have up to six simultaneous connections with their superfast servers, and they protect your data while you're traveling.

所以，嗯，我... ...你可以有多達六個同時連接 與他們的超高速服務器， 他們保護你的數據 當你旅行。

If you ever have an issue, they have 24 7 customer support.

如果你有任何問題，他們有24 7的客戶支持。

And if you're on the fence, they offer a 30 day money back guarantee.

如果你在猶豫不決，他們提供30天的退款保證。

Cybersex, sweets, access an ad blocker, Hallelujah and Nord Links allows you an even faster connection.

網絡性，糖果，接入廣告攔截器，哈利路亞和諾德鏈接讓你有更快的連接。

Plus, there's absolutely no data logging.

另外，完全沒有數據記錄。

You go to nord VPN dot com slash anna and use the code Anna to get 70% off a three year plan and an extra month for free.

你去nord VPN點com slash anna，使用代碼Anna就可以享受三年計劃的七折優惠，還可以免費多用一個月。

Protect yourself online today and go to nord VPN dot com slash anna to start browsing safely and securely.

今天就來保護自己上網，去nord VPN點com斜槓anna，開始安全放心地瀏覽。