REG, HOW WAS SEDONA?

REG，SEDONA怎麼樣了？

>> IT WAS REALLY COOL.

>> 它是真的很酷。

FAIRLY AMAZING, BEAUTIFUL.

FAIRLY AMAZING，BEAUTIFUL。

JUST INSANE GEOGRAPHY.

只是瘋狂的地理學。

IT'S INCREDIBLE.

這是難以置信的。

>> James: WHEN YOU GOT THERE, WERE YOU, LIKE, AH, I COMPLETELY

>> 詹姆斯。當你到了那裡，你，就像，啊，我完全... ...

UNDERSTAND WHY THEY NAMED A CAR AFTER THIS PLACE.

理解為什麼他們以這個地方的名字命名一輛車。

( LAUGHTER ) BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I IMAGINE.

因為那是我想象中的。

AH, YEAH, IT'S A MID-SIZE, I GET IT, A RENTAL AT THE AIRPORT.

啊，是的，這是一箇中等規模的，我明白了，在機場租房。

>> Reggie: YEAH.

>> 雷吉：YEAH。

IT WAS LIKE THE FIRST PROBABLY AMONG THE FIRST THINGS THAT I

它就像第一個可能的第一件事，我的第一。

THOUGHT.

思想。

>> Reggie: I THINK THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS TO A LOT OF PEOPLE.

>> 我想這是很多人都會遇到的情況。

>> Reggie: THAT'S KIND OF WHY I WENT UP THERE, I WAS, LIKE,

>> 這就是為什麼，去那裡，而你，喜歡。

DOES IT LIVE UP TO THE NAME?

它是否名副其實？

( LAUGHTER ) LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT HEADLINES.

讓我們來看看頭條新聞。

OVER THE WEEKEND, PRESIDENT TRUMP SEEMED TO ACCIDENTALLY

上週末，特朗普總統似乎意外地

ADMIT DEFEAT FOR THE FIRST TIME, WHEN HE TWEETED...

第一次承認失敗，當他在微博上... ...

"HE WON BECAUSE THE ELECTION WAS RIGGED.ù"

"他不會的，因為選舉是被操縱的。"

THAT'S RIGHT, TRUMP FINALLY ADMITTED BIDEN WON.

沒錯，特朗普終於承認比登獲勝了。

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> James: BANG!

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> James:砰！

BUT I WILL SAY, TRUMP'S HANDLERS WERE

但我會說，特朗普的處理者是

IMMEDIATELY LIKE, "PAY NO ATTENTION, IT WAS JUST A BRIEF

立即就像，"不要在意，這只是一個簡短的，"。

MOMENT OF SANITY."

理智的時刻。"

( LAUGHTER ) TRUMP WON'T EVEN MENTION BIDEN

特朗普甚至不會提到比登。

BY NAME, KIND OF WHEN A TEENAGER TALKS ABOUT THEIR EX

按名字，當一個青少年談論他們的前男友時，他們的態度是什麼？

BEST-FRIEND. "WELL I WAS HAVING A GREAT TIME AT THE MALL UNTIL

最好的朋友。"好吧，我是一個偉大的時間在商場裡，直到，

SHE SHOWED UP."

她出現了。"

"WHO?" "HER!"

"誰？""她！"

BUT AFTER HE REALIZED WHAT HE HAD DONE, THE PRESIDENT LATER

但是，當他意識到自己的所作所為後，主席隨後......。

TWEETED THIS, IN ALL CAPS...

發了這條微博，大寫的... ...

"I WON THE ELECTION!" I'VE GOT TO SAY, YOU'D THINK

"我贏得了選舉！"我得說，你會覺得... ...

THIS WOULD BE BIGGER NEWS.

這將是更大的新聞。

( LAUGHTER ) LISTEN, AS THE PARENT OF THREE

聽著，作為三個孩子的家長。

YOUNG CHILDREN, I CAN ASSURE YOU, WE'VE STILL GOT LIKE SIX

年輕的孩子們，我可以向你們保證，我們還有6個月的時間。

MORE STAGES OF TANTRUM BEFORE WE FINALLY GET HIM DOWN FOR BED.

在我們最終把他弄上床之前，還有更多階段的暴躁。

( LAUGHTER ) HERE'S THE THING, SCREAMING

（笑）這裡的東西，尖叫聲，

SOMETHING DOESN'T MAKE IT TRUE.

有些東西並不代表它是真的。

IN FACT, IF YOU SAW A FRIEND TWEET IN ALL CAP "MY LIFE IS

事實上，如果你看到一個朋友在微博上用大寫寫著 "我的生活是："。

GOING GREAT!" YOU'D IMMEDIATELY START TO WORRY.

GOING GREAT！"你會馬上開始擔心。

( LAUGHTER ) BUT HE MAY BE SLOWLY ACCEPTING

（笑）但他可能會慢慢接受

HIS FATE BECAUSE, JUST HOURS LATER, TRUMP POSTED A MORE

他的命運，因為，僅僅幾個小時後，特朗普發佈了更多的

SUBDUED, LESS SCREAMY VERSION OF THE SAME TWEET, WRITING...

Subdued, LESS SCREAMY VERSION OF THE SAME TWEET, WRITING...

"I WON THE ELECTION!" ( LAUGHTER )

"我贏得了選舉！" （笑）

LOOK AT THAT.

看看這個。

WITHOUT THE ALL-CAPS I CAN HARDLY RECOGNIZE THAT AS A TRUMP

如果沒有大寫字母，我很難認出這是特朗普的作品。

TWEET.

TWEET。

( LAUGHTER ) ALTHOUGH HE DID RANDOMLY

（笑）雖然他是隨意的

CAPITALIZE "ELECTION" TO LET US KNOW HE HASN'T FORGOTTEN HIS

大寫 "選舉"，讓我們知道他並沒有忘記他的 "選舉"。

ROOTS.

根：

( LAUGHTER ) YOU CAN REALLY SENSE HOW

（笑）你真的可以感覺到如何。

DEFLATED TRUMP IS FROM HIS TWEETS.

脫胎換骨的特朗普是從他的推特上。

HE'S HOURS AWAY FROM TWEETING...

他離發微博還有幾個小時... ...

(SAD) "WITCH HUNT OR WHATEVER.ù" ( LAUGHTER )

（悲傷）"巫婆狩獵或什麼的。"（笑）。

SURE, LOCK HER UP.

當然，把她鎖起來。

DO WHAT YOU WANT.

做你想做的事。

YOU ALWAYS DO.

你總是這樣做。

( LAUGHTER ) >> JAMES: BUT SOME PEOPLE STILL

（笑） >> 詹姆斯：但有些人仍然是。

DON'T THINK IT'S OVER.

不要以為這一切都結束了。

ON SATURDAY, A FEW THOUSAND TRUMP SUPPORTERS GATHERED IN

星期六，幾千名特朗普的支持者聚集在。

WASHINGTON D.C. TO PROTEST THE ELECTION RESULTS.

華盛頓特區將抗議選舉結果。

BUT THE WHITE HOUSE PRESS SECRETARY FALSELY CLAIMED ON

但白宮新聞發言人卻謊稱... ...

TWITTER THAT MORE THAN A MILLION PEOPLE ACTUALLY ATTENDED.

微博說，超過一百萬人實際參加。

I MEAN, IF THIS IS HOW HIS AIDES DO MATH, THEN IT'S WONDER TRUMP

我的意思是，如果這是他的助手如何做數學，那麼它的奇蹟特朗普。

THINKS HE WON THE ELECTION.

認為他贏得了選舉。

THE PRESS SECRETARY EVEN TWEETED THIS PHOTO TO SUPPORT HER CLAIùu

新聞發言人還在微博上發了這張照片來支持她的訴求。

IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE A MILLION PEOPLE, BUT KEEP IN MIND A LOT

它看起來不像一百萬人，但要記住很多人

OF THOSE GUYS ARE WEARING CAMOUFLAGE.

這些傢伙都穿著迷彩服。

( LAUGHTER ) IT WAS KNOWN AS "THE MILLION

它被稱為 "一百萬"。

MAGA MARCH."

MAGA MARCH。"

WHICH IS BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL NAME, "THE CRAZIES

哪一個比原名 "瘋子 "更好？

THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE."

感恩節遊行。"

( LAUGHTER ) WHAT KIND OF FLOATS AND GIANT

什麼樣的漂浮物和巨無霸？

BALLOONS WOULD YOU SEE AT "THE CRAZIES THANKSGIVING DAY

你會在 "瘋狂的感恩節 "看到氣球嗎？

PARADE?" WHAT WOULD YOU GET THERE?

遊行？"你會得到什麼呢？

>> WE'RE TALKING THE CRAZIES THANKSGIVING PARADE?

>> 我們正在談論瘋狂的感恩節遊行？

>> James: YEAH.

>> 詹姆斯。YEAH.

WHAT KIND OF FLOATS?

什麼類型的漂浮物？

>> James: WHAT SORT OF BALLOONS WOULD YOU SEE?

>> 詹姆斯。你會看到什麼樣的氣球？

>> MAYBE A FLOUT OF MY EXWIFE.

>> 也許是我前妻的出軌。

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: HANG OPEN.

( 笑 ) >> 詹姆斯:掛開。

WHAT DID YOU SAY?

你說什麼？

>> AT THE CRAZIES THANKSGIVING PARADE?

>> 在瘋狂的感恩節遊行中？

>> James: YEAH.

>> 詹姆斯。YEAH.

THE KIND OF FLOAT WE MAY SEE?

我們可能看到的浮力？

>> James: YEAH.

>> 詹姆斯。YEAH.

HOW ABOUT MY EX-WIFE.

我的前妻怎麼樣了？

>> James: I STILL DON'T GET IT.

>> 詹姆斯。我還是不明白。

( LAUGHTER ) AND I DID THAT THING WHERE I

（笑），我做了那件事，我在哪裡？

LAUGHED ALONG.

一起笑了起來。

>> I THINK HE'S SUGGESTING HIS EX-WIFE IS CRAZY.

>> 我想他是在暗示他的前妻是瘋子。

>> Reggie: SHE'S CRAZY.

>> 她是個瘋子。

NOT ONLY DOES SHE HAVE A COUPLE OF SCREWS LOOSE, SHE

她不僅有一連串的螺絲鬆了，她還

DRIVES ME CRAZY.

把我逼瘋了。

( RIM SHOT ) ( LAUGHTER )

（輪輞拍攝）（笑）。

>> James: HONESTLY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M MISSING.

>> 詹姆斯。老實說，我不知道我錯過了什麼。

( LAUGHTER ) I KNOW I'M IN THE MINORITY.

我知道我是少數派。

IAN SAID IT, I BELIEVE IT'S FUNNY, I JUST DON'T GET IT.

IAN說，我相信這很有趣，我只是不明白這一點。

DO YOU GET IT, GUILLERMO?

你明白了嗎，GILLERMO？

>> I WOULD JUST SUGGEST MOVING ON.

>> 我只是建議繼續前進。

( LAUGHTER ) LOOK, WHETHER IT WAS -- LOOK,

（笑）看，無論它是 - 看。

WHETHER IT WAS THOUSANDS OR A MILLION, THE IMPORTANT THING IS

不管是幾千還是幾百萬，最重要的是...

THAT THE WHITE HOUSE IS STILL ENCOURAGING PEOPLE TO GATHER IN

白宮仍在鼓勵人們聚集在一起。

LARGE GROUPS WITHOUT MASKS RIGHT NOW.

大群人沒有面具，現在。

( LAUGHTER ) IN ORLANDO, FLORIDA,

在佛羅里達州奧蘭多市。

THE CITY JUST UNVEILED PLANS FOR THE NATION'S FIRST-EVER FLYING

本市剛剛公佈了全國首創的飛天計劃

CAR HUB.

汽車樞紐。

HERE'S AN ARTIST'S RENDERING OF WHAT IT WILL LOOK LIKE

這是一個藝術家對未來的描述

SO AN AIRPORT. THEY INVENTED AN AIRPORT.

所以，他們發明了一個機場。

IT'S BEING CALLED A "VERTIPORT."

它被稱為一個 "VERTIPORT"。

AS IN (SERIOUS NEWS ANCHOR) "THERE WAS YET ANOTHER ACCIDENT

就像（嚴肅的新聞主播）"又發生了一起意外"。

TODAY AT THE NATION'S FIRST VERTIPORT..."

"今天在全國第一個轉播點..."

( LAUGHTER ) LOOK AT -- BRING THAT UP!

（笑）看 - 提起這個！

HOW IS THAT A FLYING CAR?

這怎麼是一輛會飛的車？

IF YOU HAVE A TWENTY-FOUR-FOOT WINGSPAN, THAT'S NOT A CAR!

如果你有24英尺的翼展，那就不是車了!

GOOD LUCK AT THE CARL'S JUNIOR DRIVE-THRU LANE.

祝好運，在卡樂斯少年車道。

( LAUGHTER ) HERE'S MY DEBIT CARD, SHOULD I

這是我的借記卡，我是不是應該

JUST THROW IT TO YOU?

就這樣扔給你？

( LAUGHTER ) WOULD YOU DO THIS, GUILLERMO?

（笑）你會這樣做，GILLERMO？

YOU WERE TRYING TO SHOW ME THE WINGS DR. .

你想給我看翅膀，博士。

>> FLIP IN.

>> 翻入。

>> James: IT DOESENTS LOOK LIKE A CAR.

>> 詹姆斯。它看起來像一輛汽車。

>> IT LOOKS LIKE A COMB.

>> 它看起來像一個梳子。

>> Reggie: IT'S MADE BY LILLIAN.

>> 雷吉：它是由LILLIAN製造的。

IT'S A MULTI-PROPULSION SYSTEM KIND OF GROUND EFFECT VEHICLE.

這是一種多動力系統的地面效應車輛。

IT'S HARD.

這是很難的。

YOU CAN'T MAKE CARS LOOK LIKE CARS AND FLY.

你不能讓汽車看起來像汽車並飛起來。

I'LL SEE YA LATER.

我待會兒會去那裡的。

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: THAT'S TOO MUCH!

（笑） >> 詹姆斯：那是太多了！

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: THAT'S TOO MUCH!

（笑） >> 詹姆斯：那是太多了！

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: THAT'S TOO MUCH!

（笑） >> 詹姆斯：那是太多了！

BUT THAT'S MY POINT, THEN, DON'T CALL IT A FLYING CAR.

但這是我的觀點，那麼，不要叫它飛車。

>> Reggie: I AGREE.

>> 雷吉：《協議》。

>> James: CALL IT SOMETHING ELSE BECAUSE IF IT'S A FLYING

>> 詹姆斯。因為如果它是一個飛翔的東西

CAR, I WANT IT TO BE A SEDONA.

車，我想它是一輛SEDONA。

( LAUGHTER ) I WANT IT TO BE A SEDONA AND I

我希望它是一個塞多納和我。

WANT IT STUCK IN TRAFFIC.

希望它停留在車流中。

I DON'T WANT IT TO GO TO A VERTIPORT AND TAKE OFF.

我不希望它去一個VERTIPORT和起飛。

I WANT TO BE ON THE 405 IN TRAFFIC AND BE LIKE, TWO HOURS,

我想在405號公路上的車流中待上兩個小時。

FORGET THAT.

忘了這一點。

SEE YOU LATER, GUYS!

回頭見，夥計們！

THAT'S A FLYING CAR.

那是一輛會飛的車。

>> Reggie: I AGREE.

>> 雷吉：《協議》。

>> James: AND FINALLY, JUST IN TIME FOR THE HOLIDAYS, THE SNACK

>> 詹姆斯。最後，正好趕上假期，小點心。

COMPANY RITZ IS GIVING AWAY A GIANT TEN

RITZ公司送出了一個巨大的十元錢。

INCH CRACKER MEANT TO BE USED AS AN EDIBLE HOLIDAY CHEESE BOARD.

寸裂紋器的目的是作為一個可食用的節日奶酪板。

HERE IT IS HERE. SO NOW YOU CAN BE LIKE, "DO I

在這裡，它在這裡。所以現在你可以說："難道我

WANT AN APPETIZER?

想要一個開胃菜嗎？

I REALLY SHOULDN'T. BUT I GUESS I CAN HAVE ONE CRACKER."

我真的不應該，但我想我可以有一個破解器。"

( LAUGHTER ) I LOVE THAT PEOPLE AREN'T

（笑）我愛的是，人們不。

ALLOWED TO SHARE FOOD BECAUSE OF COVID AND RITZ IS LIKE, "BUT

允許分享食物，因為科維德和裡茨是一樣，"但是，"。

WHAT IF YOU COULD EAT THE PLATE EVERYONE'S BEEN TOUCHING ALL

如果你能吃到大家都在吃的那個盤子呢？

NIGHT LONG?!" ( LAUGHTER )

夜長夢多？"。 （笑）

A TEN-INCH CRACKER.

一個十英寸的裂縫。

IS IT PRACTICAL?

它是實用的嗎？

NO.

號碼：

BUT IS IT INTERESTING?

但它是有趣的？

ALSO NO.

也是NO.

THE CRACKER ISN'T FOR SALE.

破解器是不賣的。

IT'S BEING GIVEN AWAY THROUGH RITZ'S INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT.

通過RITZ的INSTAGRAM賬戶送出。

WHICH EXPLAINS THIS ODD TWEET FROM TRUMP...

這就解釋了特朗普的這條奇怪的微博...

"I WON THE GIANT RITZ CRACKER!" ( LAUGHTER )

"我贏得了巨大的RITZ CRACKER！" （笑）。