Top story according to the most trusted paper in those street corner newsstand containers that fall over in the wind.

The Epoch Times election outcome unclear amid pending recounts and legal challenges unclear, it's not unclear.

Bubbly King Don Perignon trump one.

Obviously liberal George Soros, Stephanopoulos and his Marxist Jihad gang have gotten to the epoch times, and we need a new newspaper that smells like joining us now is Rhodes scholar and investigative reporter Ronan Farrow.

Good day, Ronan.

Good to be here.

All right, here's what I think happened.

The Democrats hacked the paper ballots.

Ronan.

First question goes to you.

How long has paper been computers?

Well, you know what we know right now is there's no evidence of irregularities.

There's just no evidence of a bunch of the things you're saying.

Well, I just feel bad that you require the crutch of evidence to decide what's true.

You know, I know how the Democrats hacked the paper ballots, papers made out of trees and all the dead Democrats were in the ground in influence in the trays and whatnot and have when What have you in such now after the Democrats cheated in the presidential Super Bowl sponsored by limp biscuit flavored Doritos.

We vowed to never play again, But now RNC chair Ronna McDaniel is telling us to get back out on the field way.

Should go there crazy numbers and they should have won.

But then there's still Yeah, we have toe.

We didn't see that in the audit, so we've got to just that evidence I haven't seen.

So we'll wait and see on that.

I would study and work.

It's not decided with the certification.

So if you lose your faith and you don't vote, people walk away.

That's that.

Will decided.

This reminds me of varsity blues.

When James Vandersloot Beak said, yes, the game is 100% rigged, but risk getting a deadly virus toe win.

Ronan, have you seen the 1999 movie Varsity Blues?

So you understand what's happening in 2020 Georgia electoral politics?

You know, I've never seen varsity blues, roads, heads and an expert on this.

What I can say is the point that that was made earlier, that, you know people are at risk of losing faith in electoral institutions.

There's some truth to that.

There is a dangerous thing happening here.

People with political motive are calling into question institutions.

They're actually up and running pretty well right now.

You know, Georgia is a place where democracy is working pretty much as it should Right now, I mean, this is war.

And as stated in the Third Amendment, Georgians have two quarter pole watches in their houses and stock up on frozen pancakes.

Everybody, because every morning I wake up starving.

Just donate the Super PAC that I've co founded with Calista Gingrich that promises to challenge the Georgia election results as soon as we finish remodeling our kitchens.

Now I've been followed in the night by the ethereal specter of a young woman for so long that she is surely of legal voting age now.

So let's not complain about dead people voting and start having real conversations with these shadow demons about why the Republican platform is right for them right now.

I want everyone to look at this is Arizona's Republican governor was certifying the fake election results when he got a call from the commander in beef requesting one horsey sauce soaked battleground election, please.

And here's what he said.

What he did.

No one sends the president to voicemail unless you're me and this is your outgoing message.

Tyler is unavailable at the moment, probably lifting weights or flipping my car 30 times.

But if this is my ripped Dewey I commander in chief, I will call you back and become your bro for life.

And I want Ben Carson just so our heads together.

My guy is another trumpet guy.

He president.

He's my guy.

I love you.

That's how you respect the office.

A ronin.

You rose to prominence for your intrepid journalism in the war on men, helping to spur a me too reckoning in Hollywood media and politics.

But one industry has avoided the microscope, and that's those nasty mo fo's on Wall Street.

It seems like the only Brooks brother who got dragged was this little crazy guy here.

At least I didn't have a boss who said to me, kill it the way that Mayor Bloomberg never have, said Toe one of pregnant employees.

Ah, billionaire who calls women fat broads and horse faced lesbians.

And no, I'm not talking about Donald Trump.

I'm talking about Mayor Bloomberg.

Democrats are not going to win if we have a nominee who has a history off hiding his tax returns off harassing women.

So a Wall Street guy got called out, but only because he ran for president and was the most charmless cyst in the universe.

Now I didn't think the me too movement mattered until I realized my daughter is eyes pop out of your head sexy, and she just got an internship at a bank, So I am freaking out badly.

So what is it about Wall Street that allows people to get away with this look power and money can be a shield.

We've seen that in story after story, and it's unfortunate that in a lot of cases it's taken investigative journalism, not just for me, from a whole community of of reporters who've worked on these kinds of stories to break through inaction by authorities that should have investigated serial crimes.

So what Elizabeth Warren says about the way that you know Mayor Bloomberg talked about women is certainly true whether there's something worse behind that, you know, we don't know.

There haven't been those kinds of disclosures about Mayor Bloomberg.

There was a substantive discussion about his use of non disclosure agreements.

You know, I'm not saying this is true in Bloomberg's case, but in a lot of cases, powerful people use legal instruments like nondisclosure agreements to evade accountability.

That's something that should change and Wall Street and beyond.

Ronan.

I am concerned that holding Wall Street to account for their lawless treatment of women is a slippery slope towards holding them to account for their lawless treatment of the economy, government and all life on Earth.

What do you say to average voters like May I think that it's pretty indisputable that there's a need to hold Wall Street accountable much more than it's being on the whole range of issues.

All right, life is short, and if I don't eat 100 wasabi mustard packets in the next five minutes, I will regret it.

So let's wrap it up with I'm not done.

I am disgusted that incoming Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen signature will be on the money now for all those who wish to join me in protest, I am issuing my own currency called Patriot Books, which, as you can guess from the name, is made entirely of my own bodily fluids.