President Trump's attorney, Rudy Giuliani, has tested positive for Cove in 19, a bad break and what has otherwise been a flawless month.

Giuliani took a break from brushing only his top teeth to tweet.

Thank you to all my friends and followers.

For all the prayers and kind wishes.

I'm getting great care and feeling good, recovering quickly and keeping up with everything.

We should note that the pandemic death toll is now being compared to a 9 11 every day.

So Giuliani contracting the virus could be an attempt to once again capitalized on that.

Rudy is just one of the record 100,000 Americans in the hospital tonight, most of whom, unlike Giuliani, are not that Joey Chestnut of ingesting covert spores.

Here's the chief adviser for Operation Warp Speed talking about when we'll start to see vaccine results.

Well, I think we may start to see some impact on the most acceptable people, probably in the month of January and February, but on a population basis for for for our lives to start getting back to normal.

We're talking about April or may.

Obviously, I should be in the front of the line.

But as a precautionary measure, I have gone through the painstaking task of going to the Halloween store and buying a hunky doctor costume.

Clarence, what sort of high jinks do you plan apart taken to make sure you get that vaccine first?

Well, let me say, First of all that I wish really Giuliani a speedy recovery as I say that everybody who has Kobe as's faras my own hijinks are concerned or masks.

I have planned to wear one that says, uh, make America whole again after the Trump Administration.

You know, this vaccine can't come soon enough.

The first thing I'm going to do post vaccine is walking to a Macy's and spend one full hour trying to decide between buying a blouse and cream or get him both.

Girl, you deserve it.

Well, what we talked about was a covert.

That's right, James and I got to say I'm excited for a vaccine, but I'm blessed to be as healthy as I am.

It's important to me that essential workers, the elderly and the immuno compromised have access to the vaccine.

Before I do.

They need it more.

That's just the way the distribution works.

He's trying to claim selfless, something he has no choice in felt like for a brief second that I just died there now.

Meanwhile, Axios reports that President Trump is preparing for an exit plan if for some reason his hospitalized goon can't invalidate the Constitution, President Trump is considering a made for TV grand finale, a White House departure on Marine One and Final Air Force One flight to Florida for a political rally opposite Joe Biden's inauguration.

Trump, of course, smearing Jimmy Carter's graceful post presidency of building houses that say, Eat my, it's on the roof.

Clarence.

If Biden loses in 2024 should he outdo Trump, it just set the White House on fire.

Well, that may be all that's left.

I'm still thinking about how, for last couple of months I have been able find anybody who thought that Donald Trump was going to show up for the inauguration, and sure enough, he is promising that he will not.

I don't buy the hype that he's going to be some anarchist troll.

I think Trump's going to take up normal post presidential hobbies of trying to make a much money as possible without going to prison.

Well, I'm going to point this out.

It zits tradition in America that the loser of a presidential election dedicates their post presidential life to seeking revenge.

That's why John Kerry is always sitting on a hill overlooking George W.

Bush's house with binoculars and a stupid little henchman who just can't get anything right now.

Look, when I didn't win prom King, I just held my own prom in my parents garage, blasted Sean Paul and grinded with a vacuum cleaner.

You know, Awesome.

We kind of open this conversation on the floor.

You don't have to say something, you know, actually, I kind of prefer if you just kind of turn your chair around for the rest of the show.

Well, you don't need to worry about me.

I've been taking minoxidil.

You can zoom in on that bad boy.

Hold on.

Here yours is Okay, But I got a really nice thick of going back here.

You lost on that jungle.

That's shiny.

Take a look at the back of my head here.

What do you think the oh, look, I have got is as a bump on it.

I'm for sure.

I feel like I'm I feel like I'm winning.

Whatever this is, I don't know.

The bloom bump is when many of blue ribbon at many a state fair.

And what do you think is the secret to your success?

Well, I don't try too hard.

I just try Thio Let the bump be what it wants to be.

I do want to note that all my dandruff that's actually nutmeg I put that there myself with a little micro plane every morning.

Just felt like I died again.

Now, before we go on our first episode of big news, we called Rudy Giuliani to address a rumor.

We started that while he was at the Grand Havana room, he left an extremely toxic stain on a chair that at one point appeared to growl.

As much as I want to follow up on that story, I consider myself a journalist second and a human first.

So let's call Rudy and see how he's holding up.

Given his recent Kobe diagnosis, your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system.

Yes, okay.

Is not available at the tone.

Please record your message.

Hey, Mr Mayor James Smart would from CBS all access just had a couple questions for you.

First of all, how you holding up?

Have the other viruses in your body teamed up to kill Covad yet?

Also is that hospitals?

I see you facing a bed shortage.

Now they have to burn yours when you're done with it.

So anyways, about this chair that you left a stain on at the Grand Havana room the latest I've heard is a stain actually melted through the foundation through Manhattan shell bedrock.

And now lava is squirting all over members extra wide Florsheim shoes and yellow zirconium cufflinks.

EPA and Interpol are now sniffing around, so if you get back to us, everyone would really appreciate it.

Alright.

Later, pal.

You gotta feel better.

Okay?

Mhm.

Yeah.