"LATE, LATE SHOW."

THANK YOU FOR STAYING UP AND HANGING OUT WITH US.

WE'RE SO HAPPY THAT YOU ARE HERE, WE HAVE A GOOD SHOW

PLANNED FOR YOU TONIGHT.

WE'LL BE JOINED BY THE DASHING KYLE CHANDLER.

LATER A PERFORMANCE FROM MEGAN TRAINOR -- MEGHAN TRAINOR SO

STICK AROUND, KIELD CHANDLER, FIRST TIME ON THE SHOW.

I'M EXCITED.

>> THAT GUY IS SMOOTH AS BUTTERMILK.

>> James: YOU'RE LOOKING SMOOTH AS BUTTERMILK, WHERE DID

THE STASH GO.

>> I HAD TO LEAVE IT IN THE PAST, I GOT AHEAD FOR 2020,

CLEAN SLATE, CLEAN FACE.

>> James: WILL YOU BE REALLY SHOCKED WHEN YOU HEAD INTO 2021.

>> I THE WHOLE YEAR.

>> James: HEY FRK THERE IS EVER A YEAR TO MISS, IT WAS THIS

ONE, IT REALLY WAS.

WHERE ARE WE AT HANUKKAH WISE?

WHAT NIGHT ARE WE ON NOW.

>> WE GOT FIVE ON IT.

>> James: WE GOT FIVE ON IT.

>> THAT'S RIGHT, YEAH.

>> James: DO WE DO ANYTHING ON THE FIFTH NIGHT?

>> IN IS SORT OF WHEN INTEREST TRAILS OFF FOR MOST JEWS.

LIKE-- PEOPLE PROBABLY FORGET TO LIGHT THEIR MENORAH TONIGHT, PUT

THE DREIDLE AWAY, SHAME EAT COLD COINS OVER THE SINK, THAT IS

NIGHT FIVE.

>> James: RIGHT, NOW THERE IS SOMETHING ON THE DESK HERE TRK

SAYS TOO JAMES,-- IT SAYS LOOK AT THAT.

LOOK WHO IS ON IT.

IS THIS REAL, LOU, OR DID YOU MAKE THIS, DID THEY REALLY SENT

THIS.

>> THEY SENT IT.

>> James: NO, THEY DIDN'T.

>> YES, THEY DID.

>> James: FOR REAL?

NO, LOOK AT THAT, HAPPY HOLIDAYS, HAVE A VERY DA VINCI

CHRISTMAS LOVE THE VORAK TWINS LACK AT THAT.

JUST AS WE STARTED TO FORE BET ABOUT THEM.

-- FORGET ABOUT THEM.

>> WELL PLAYED.

YZ THANK YOU, THANK YOU BROTHERS, ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS.

BLESS YOU.

>> DA VINCI?

>> James: ALL RIGHT, LET'S START WITH SOME HEADLINES.

LET'S JUMP IN, BIG NEWS, GUYS.

IT IS HAPPENING, THE FIRST CORONAVIRUS VACCINE HAVE BEEN

ADMINISTERED HERE IN THE UNITED STATES.

YEAH, IT'S HAPPENING.

GIVING OUT VACCINE.

MAKING THE VACCINE, THE SECOND HOTTEST ITEM TO GET THIS

CHRISTMAS BEHIND THE PLAY STATION 5.

THE VERY FIRST DOSE WENT TO A CRITICAL CARE NURSE IN NEW YORK,

NEEDLESS TO SAY HER TINDER IS BLOWING UP.

HERE IS HER GETTING A SHOT, LOOK THE AT, THAT I KNOW SHE IS

GETTING THE VACCINE BUT THE GUY IN THAT SUIT IS STANDING WAY

CLOSER THAN SIX FEET.

THAT'S-- JUST BACK OFF FOR LIKE A MONTH, BRO.

BUT LOOK AT THAT PICTURE.

YOU KNOW THAT 2020 HAS OPINION WEIRD BECAUSE I'M LOOKING AT A

PERSON IN A FACE MASK GETTING INJECTED AND I'M THINKING I

CANNOT WAIT FOR THAT TO BE ME.

ANG DONALD TRUMP WAS OBVIOUSLY EXCITED ABOUT THE VACCINE TOO

BECAUSE HE TWEETED FIRST VACCINE ADMINISTERED.

CONGRATULATIONS, U SRK ARC.

CONGRATULATIONSK WORLD.

>> IT IS THE FIRST VACCINE AFTER THE UNITED KINGDOM DID IT A WEEK

AGO BUT SURE, CONGRATULATIONS, WORLD.

ALTHOUGH IN TRUMP'S DEFENSE THIS WAS MAJOR WORLDWIDE NEWS, THERE

IS NO WAY HE WOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT THAT EVER HAPPENED.

ALTHOUGH YOU CAN TELL TRUMP WAS HAPPY.

YOU COULD.

HE THREW OPEN THE WINDOWS TO THE OVAL OFFICE AND HE TOLD AN

AWESOME BOY TO GO AND BUY THE BIGGEST CHRISTMAS GOOSE HE COULD

FIND.

MEANWHILE TODAY WAS A HUGE MILESTONE FOR THE PRESIDENTIAL

ELECTION.

THE LECH TRIAL COLLEGE GATHERED IN ALL 50 STATES TODAY AND

OFFICIALLY CONFIRMED JOE BIDEN'S VICTORY.

CONGRATULATIONS, U.S.A.

CONGRATULATIONS, WORLD.

(APPLAUSE) THIS IS THE RELIEF.

I WOULD HATE TO START ANOTHER WEEK OF SHOWS WITHOUT TALKING

ABOUT THE SAME ELECTION RESULTS WE'VE ALL KNOWN FOR THE LAST

MONTH AND A HALF.

(LAUGHTER) I MEAN IT'S ALL OVER

IT'S ALL OVER NOW.

AT THIS POINT, TRUMP'S ONLY REMAINING OPTION IS JUST KIND OF

GOING LIMP AND LAYING IN THE OVAL OFFICE FLOOR

THE OVAL OFFICE FLOOR LIKE MY THREE YEAR OLD DOES WHEN THEY

REFUSE TO LEAVE A TOY STORE.

COME ON, WE'RE GOING.

I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

I WILL NOT LEAVE.

MOVING ON, OVER THE WEEKEND, PRESIDENT TRUMP GAVE HIS FIRST

INTERVIEW SINCE THE ELECTION.

AND HE IS STILL THREATENING THAT HE WON, YOU KNOW, BECAUSE OF THE

BOOKIES.

>> THE ELECTION WAS OVER AT 10:00 IN THE EVENING, HI WOB, IT

WAS 97-9%, ALL OF THE BOOKIES ALL OVER THE WORLD WERE SAYING

THE ELECTION IS OVER, THEY WOULDN'T EVEN TAKE BETS ON IT.

ALL OF A SUDDEN AROUND 11:00, BALANCE ATS START GETTING

DROPPED.

>> James: THEY WOULDN'T EVEN TAKE BETS ON IT.

YOU KNOW WHAT WE GATHER FROM THIS?

I THINK YOU KNOW WHAT THIS HUNDRED PERCENT MEANNESS TRUMP

TRIED TO BET ON THE ELECTION.

AND IN TRUMP'S DEFENSE, WHY IS THIS SO HARD FOR DEMOCRATS TO

UNDERSTAND.

YOU KNOW, 11 P.M., WHEN A SWEATY GUY NAMED TINY RUNNING A NUMBERS

GAME IN THE PARKING LOT OF AN ARBIES SAYS THE ELECTION IS

OVER, IT'S OVER, GUYS.

BUT TRUMP IS TALKING THIS ISSUE VERY SERIOUSLY.

IS HE ALREADY PLANNING TO APPEAL THIS ALL THE WAY UP TO THE

SPORTS CLUB AT CAESAR PALACE.

ARE YOU A GAMBLER.

DO YOU GAMBLE EVER?

>> I AM A RAMBLING GAMBLING MAN EVERY NOW AND THEN.

>> James: YEAH?

>> YEAH.

>> James: WHAT SORT OF STUFF DO YOU BET ON.

>> WE GO TO VEGAS, I WILL BET SPORTS.

ONE TIME I BET MY BROTHER A KID ROCK CD THAT I WOULD EAT A STICK

OF BUTTER AND I WON.

>> James: WOW.

>> YEAH.

>> James: CONGRATULATIONS.

>> THAT'S RIGHT, YEAH.

>> James: ANY OF THE BANDS BETTING MEN.

DO YOU EVER LAY ANY MONEY DOWNK REG, I CAN'T SEE YOU BETTING.

>> Reggie: I DON'T LIKE IT, I DON'T TRUST ME.

>> James: YEAH, ME NEITHER, I DON'T GET IT ALTHOUGH I WOULD

LIKE TO GET INTO GAMBLING ATTIRE.

>> OH YEAH.

>> James: I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE A HAT WITH A LITTLE, YOU KNOW, A

CARD OR A BOX OF CIGARETTES IN IT AND-- ALWAYS SLAPPING A

NEWSPAPER, WHAT IS ON THE 4:00, JOE, WHOA, WE GOT A BIG ONE.

I LIKE THAT ASPECT OF IT.

IT IS THE PART WITH MONEY.

>> YOU LIKE THE LIFESTYLE.

>> James: I LIKE THE LIFESTYLE, I LOVE ALL OF IT, TO

JUST FULLY GET INTO IT, I GOT A SIGNIFICANT AR.

ONLY TALK LIKE THAT, COMING IN 5 TO 1, PUT YOUR MONEY ON A

BIG-- NOW, HEY DOLL FACE, DOLL FACE, ONE MORE PITCHER OF HARVEY

WALL BANGERS OVER HERE.

>> James: THAT'S RIGHT.

>> THEY'RE COMING IN JOE, THEY'RE COMING IN NOW.

>> James: I LIKE THE IDEA OF THAT BEING MY LIFE.

>> Reggie: BUT NOT ACTUALLY PUTTING ANY MONEY DOWN.

>> James: NEVER ACTUALLY RISKING MONEY.

>> Reggie: I'M WITH YOU.

>> James: WHAT I AM SAYING IS I WOULD LIKE TO BE ONE OF THE

CHARACTERS IN GUYS & DOLLS.

>> OKAY.

>> YOU KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT, THAT'S RIGHT, REGGIE

WATTS, THAT IS A GREAT NAME FOR THAT SORT OF ACTION.

WHAT YOU SAY, REG, WHAT YOU SAY WE PUT SOME MOOLAH DOWN ON THE

OLD 240.

>> Reggie: I SAY THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.

YOU KNOW WHAT, I GOT ANOTHER IDEA.

>> WHAT INJURE OTHER IDEA, REGGIE.

>> Reggie: WE ARE COULD PUT A COUP IL NUMBERS DOWN ON THAT GUY

THAT DOES THE THING DOWNTOWN.

>> James: YEAH, CUTIE PIE, RUN THAT THING DOWNTOWN, WE WANT A

COUPLE OF BUCKS DOWN.

>> YOU GUYS WANT A COUPLE OF-- .

>> James: HEY, HERE'S SOME DICE, CUTIE PIE, YOU HAVE ALWAYS

BEEN GREAT LUCK FOR ME.

HOW MUCH DID WE WIN.

NOTHING, WE ARE NOT ACTUALLY GAMBLING.

WE JUST LIKE THE LIFESTYLE.

>> WHAT IS THAT NOISE, IT'S THE FUDZ.

WE GOT TO SHUT THE WHOLE THING DOWN.

>> WOO WOO WOO.

DONK, GIVE ME A BREAK, OFFICER, YOU KNOW WHAT WE'RE LIKE.

HOW ABOUT A COUPLE OF HARD BUCKS AND YOU SAY NOTHING EVER

HAPPENED, HUH?

>> YOU KNOW THE PENALTY FOR BRIBING AN OFFICER OF THE LAW

IS, SON.

>> I DON'T KNOW, WHAT DO YOU SAY?

>> TECHNICALLY NOTHING BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT BETTING ANY MONEY.

>> EXACTLY.

YOU KNOW WHY?

WE JUST LIKE THE LIFESTYLE.

(LAUGHTER).

>> James: JUST HAVING FUN.

>> WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK ON THE COLGATE COMEDY HOUR.

>> Reggie: COLGATE.

>> James: AND ANOTHER POINT-- AT ANOTHER POINT DURING

THE INTERVIEW, TRUMP TRIED TO MAKE

THE CASE THAT HE WON THE ELECTION BY GETTING DEEP INTO

THE NUMBERS, AND I'M NOT SURE IT HELPED.

>> I JUST GOT 75 MILLION VOTES.

THE BIGGEST NUMBER OF VOTES IN THE HISTORY OF OUR COUNTRY EVER

GOTTEN BY A SITTING PRESIDENT.

I WENT FROM 63 MILLION TO 75 MILLION, A 12 MILLION VOTE

DIFFERENCE, THAT'S THE BIGGEST MARGIN IN HISTORY.

THEY SAY IF I GOT 67, THE SMARTEST PEOPLE-- IF I GOT 67

MILLION VOTES I COULDN'T LOOSE, I GOT 75 MILLION AND THEY SAY I

LOST.

I DIDN'T LOSE.

>> James: SO AS FAR AS >> James: SO, AS FAR AS GOING TO

THE INAUGURATION, I'LL JUST PUT YOU DOWN FOR A “NO.”

MAYBE?

IT'S A NO.

I LOVE HOW TRUMP ONLY TALKS ABOUT HOW MANY VOTES HE GOT.

HE CAN ONLY SEE THE VOTES, HE NEVER ONCE MENTIONED THAT

SOMEBODY ELSE GOT MORE VOTES THAN HIM.

THAT'S LIKE ME RUNG THE HUNDRED METERS AND GOING I DON'T

UNDERSTAND IT, THAT IS THE FASTEST I HAVE EVER RUN IT.

I HAVE NEVER, I'VE NEVER RUN A HUNDRED METERS THAT FAST AND YET

SHOW I LOST.

HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.

(LAUGHTER) TRUMP BASED HIS CLAIM ON WHAT HE

WAS TOLD BY QUOTE THE SMARTEST PEOPLE IN THE BUSINESS.

JUST TO BE CLEAR, TRUMP THINKS THAT THIS IS ONE OF THE SMARTEST

PEOPLE IN THE BUSINESS.

AND FINALLY HERE IS THE STORY FROM SWEDEN.

A MCDONALD'S THERE HAS OPENED THE WORLD'S FIRST GOLDEN M

BARBERSHOP WHICH SPECIALIZES IN GIVING PEOPLE THE GOLDEN M, A

'90S STYLE HAIRCUT YOU MIGHT REMEMBER.

HERE IT IS HERE.

LOOK AT THAT.

THANK GOD SWEDISH PEOPLE ARE ALREADY BEAUTIFUL.

( LAUGHTER ) DO YOU THINK YOU COULD PULL THAT

HAIRSTYLE OFF?

>> Reggie: YEAH.

>> James: REALLY?

>> Reggie: I WOULD WANT TO.

>> James: I WOULD LOVE TO SEE YOU WITH THAT HAIR.

LOOK, THERE IS HE.

LOOK.

>> THAT A GOOD LOOK.

>> James: THAT 100% WORKS.

>> Reggie: A GOOD LOOK, I LIKE IT.

>> James: BASICALLY IT IS NICK CARTER FROM THE BACK STREET

BOYS, THAT IS THE HAIR.

>> YEAH.

>> James: WHERE IS IAN, HAVE WE GOT IAN WITH THAT, CAN WE

SEE?

>> THAT LOOKS GOOD.

>> James: YOU LOOK LIKE GUY FIERI'S BROTHER.

>> YEAH, WE'RE REAL PROUD OF HIM, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

>> James: CAN WE SEE THE ORIGINAL MCDONALD'S' KID AGAIN?

>> OH.

>> Reggie: BEHIND BARS.

>> James: NO, NO, THAT IS A REAL, THAT IS A REAL PHOTO OF

HAGAR.

>> GUILTY.

>> James: FROM, THAT WAS WHEN I WAS IN MY BOY BAND.

WE WERE, MY BOY BAND INSATIABLES.

YOU KNOW WHY?

YOU KNOW WHY, CC?

BECAUSE YOU JUST COULDN'T GET ENOUGH.