Name: 白宮將在特朗普離開時進行消毒｜《今夜秀》｜《今夜秀》雜誌社 (White House to Be Disinfected When Trump Leaves | The Tonight Show)
Uploaded: 2020-12-17T18:25:53.000Z
Duration: 8 min 48 s

-Thank you very much, everybody. Welcome, welcome, welcome

-非常感謝大家歡迎，歡迎，歡迎

布魯斯-斯普林斯汀在這裡的工作室。

我在後臺看到了布魯斯。我說：

"Thank you so much for being here on the first night

[ As Springsteen ] "Jimmy, for the last time, I'm not Jewish."

"吉米，最後一次，我不是猶太人"

[ Normal voice ] Let's get to the news and jokes.

好了，夥計們，事情不是很順利。

for President Trump lately, but that didn't stop him

為特朗普總統最近，但這並沒有阻止他。

from throwing a party last night. Watch this.

從拋出一個黨的最後一晚。看這個。

-Overnight, President Trump hosting a Hanukkah party

-一夜之間，特朗普總統舉辦光棍節派對。

at the White House using the holiday gathering to once again

falsely claim he can still win the election.

Even the dreidel was looking at Trump like,

就連德瑞德也像看特朗普一樣。

I like how everyone whipped out their phones

我喜歡每個人都拿出手機的樣子

to record Trump like it was a drunken fight

記錄特朗普就像它是一個喝醉了的戰鬥。

"Oh, this is going to go viral. This is going to get some hits."

"哦，這是要去病毒。這是要得到一些點擊率。"

It's probably good that Trump talked about the election.

特朗普談及大選，可能是好事。

I feel like him winging the story of Hanukkah

我覺得他就像在講光明節的故事一樣。

Jewish Santa would visit all the good little Kushners."

猶太聖誕老人會拜訪所有善良的小庫什納。"

[ Normal voice ] Speaking of the White House,

officials are going to disinfect the whole building

I have a feeling this is going to be necessary

There's a half-eaten Baconator between the cushions here.

墊子中間有一個吃了一半的培根捲餅

"Turn on the black light. Good God! Oh, my --"

"我的視網膜在燃燒！哦，我的--哦，我的--"

Biden's going to be the first president to be sworn in,

拜登將成為第一位宣誓就職的總統。

then spend the next week crashing at a La Quinta.

然後花一個星期的時間在拉昆塔酒店過夜。

Apparently, the CDC told Biden it would be safer

很明顯，疾控中心告訴拜登這樣做會更安全。

That doesn't sound -- That doesn't sound right, does it?

這聽起來不... 這聽起來不對，是嗎？

Speaking of Biden, I heard that he might take

說到拜登，我聽說他可能會拿下。

一輛美鐵列車去參加他的就職典禮。

which is slightly different than what other presidents have done.

這與其他總統的做法略有不同。

That brings us to our new educational segment called

這就給我們帶來了新的教育環節，叫做

"Presidential Inaugurations: Betcha Didn't Know!"

"總統就職典禮，你肯定不知道！"總統就職典禮：你不知道！"

-Joe Biden might travel to his inauguration by Amtrak,

喬-拜登可能會坐美鐵去參加他的就職典禮。

This has been "Presidential Inaugurations:

Betcha Didn't Know!" -Yeah, it's amazing.

Betcha Didn't Know！"-是啊，太神奇了。

Listen to this -- a pharmaceutical company

had to issue a recall after two of their drugs got mixed up.

不得不發出召回後，他們的兩個藥物得到了混合了。

-There is a recall this morning after a drug

-今天早上，在一種藥物之後，有一個召回事件。

used to treat depression somehow got bottled up

以前治療抑鬱症的方法，不知怎麼就被憋壞了。

and sent out with the generic form of Viagra!

-People knew something was up when, well...

-人們知道有什麼事情發生了，當... ...

All right? Ah, come on. [ Cymbals playing ]

好嗎？ - 啊，來吧。啊，來吧。[鐃鈸演奏]

Yeah, the people in depression commercials were like,

是啊，人們在抑鬱症的廣告是這樣的。

"Why do I have the sudden urge to sit in an outdoor bathtub?"

"為什麼我突然有種想坐在室外浴缸裡的衝動？"

Samsung just announced its new 110-inch microLED TV,

三星剛剛發佈了新款110英寸microLED電視。

Yep, so now you have a 110-inch TV playing

是的，所以現在你有一個110英寸的電視播放。

while you scroll through Instagram on your phone.

當你在手機上滾動瀏覽Instagram時。

And finally, I saw that Jay-Z just launched

his own premium brand of weed called Monogram.

他自己的優質品牌的雜草叫Monogram。

它必須是好的。今天，Jay-Z很喜歡。

"I got two problems and forgot the other 97!"

"我有兩個問題，卻忘了另一個97！"

You know, some things happen to you in life,

你知道，有些事情發生在你的生活中。

Well, last night, we just got home from doing our show,

好吧，昨晚，我們剛做完節目回家。

and everyone just started sending me texts and they go,

每個人都剛開始給我發簡訊，他們去。

"Dude, Dionne Warwick just tweeted at you."

"哥們，Dionne Warwick剛剛在推特上對你說了一句話。"

So Dionne Warwick is on Twitter now, and she's like owning.

Dionne Warwick現在在推特上，她就像擁有。

-And it's so fun. And it's her. And she tweeted,

-而且它是如此的有趣。而且是她她在推特上寫道：

字幕列表影片播放

白宮將在特朗普離開時進行消毒｜《今夜秀》｜《今夜秀》雜誌社 (White House to Be Disinfected When Trump Leaves | The Tonight Show)

depression

audience

treat

applause