- Oh, whoa! I had that. - Is that you?

Yes. That's me.

That's just, it was a very different time.

Wow. That's the coolest picture anybody in our family's ever taken.

Yeah. Aunt Julia, you look so hot, and I love that outfit.

She broke all my friends' hearts.

Mine too.

I used to steal all of her clothes.

I mean, how were you always so on-trend?

She insisted.

You got your perfect skin from grandma, too.

Yes. Well, good genes.

So what the hell happened to me then, huh?

We'd all like to know that one.

No, but it's like I always say, eat well, sleep well, take care of your skin.

What?

Oh, sorry. I'm reading an article about how to ask out your Subway sandwich artist.

Oh, I like that for you.

What's the story with this one?

Yeah. Wait, where is that from?

Oh, oh, oh. Okay.

I was in London.

- I had just graduated college. - Yes.

And I was just wandering around.

I found myself in the Chelsea flower market.

Come on!

It says you're not supposed to order chips.

Jesus.

Esther, you always get chips.

Yeah.

That's my daughter, so back to the photo.

- Mm-hmm. - I was in the flower market.

- Uh-huh. - Minding my own business, looking at these beautiful flowers, and I get a tap on my shoulder.

Gentleman says, "May I take your picture?"

It turns out he is the famous photographer Richard Avedon.

- Ahh! - Richard Avedon!

♪ My mom is so pretty ♪

♪ Elegant and fine ♪

♪ Her hair looks perfect ♪

♪ Like, 100% of the time ♪

♪ Her features are small and delicate ♪

♪ She's hotter than your mom, I bet ♪

♪ But it only makes me sad ♪

♪ 'Cause I look more like my dad ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ I've got my dad's eyebrows ♪

♪ I've got my dad's nose ♪

♪ I've got my dad's shoulders ♪

♪ I've got hair on my toes ♪

- Gross. - Just the big ones.

♪ My mom's graceful as a swan ♪

♪ I look like a hobbit with overalls on ♪

♪ It's bad ♪

♪ I take after my dad ♪

♪ She's her father's daughter, daughter ♪

♪ She's her father's daughter, daughter ♪

♪ She's her father's daughter, daughter ♪

♪ She's her father's girl ♪

♪ I chew with my mouth open ♪

♪ Whenever I'm eating ♪

♪ My sideburns are out of control ♪

♪ And your hairline's receding ♪

Yeah, I know.

♪ Her mom's skin is smooth as glass ♪

♪ But I've got my dad's pores and his weird, flat ass ♪

♪ It's grim ♪

♪ I look more like him ♪

♪ She's her father's daughter, daughter ♪

♪ She's her father's daughter, daughter ♪

♪ She's her father's daughter, daughter ♪

♪ She's her father's girl ♪

Big forehead.

Fat calves.

Bad posture.

Athlete's foot.

It's not as if you're unattractive to men.

You're just a little bit uglier than you should have been.

- ♪ Ooh ♪ - Thanks, Grandma.

That helps. It does.

♪ Should have been a ten ♪

♪ But she's a seven ♪

♪ I go out in pajamas ♪

♪ My mom irons her clothes ♪

♪ Your dad's got beautiful legs ♪

♪ But I didn't get those ♪

What the f***?

♪ It's sad, but it's the truth ♪

♪ I look like the daughter with no lines ♪

♪ From "Fiddler on the Roof" ♪

♪ And my dad's to blame ♪

♪ 'Cause we look the same ♪

♪ We're exactly like one another ♪

♪ I look like my dad's little brother ♪

♪ But I'm bad at math and have mood swings ♪

♪ Like my mom ♪

Did you like my song?

God. You need a lot of attention, don't you?