There's a candied pen heading straight for your eye

due to my act of swatting it away without first considering the trajectory!

Oh, I wish I could get my words out faster,

but everything's in slow motion!

[screaming]

And if SpongeBob does not pass this one,

it means another whole year of boating school!

Oh.

What happened?

Oh, nothing, SpongeBob, you just struck another pedestrian.

Come on, come on, come on! Bring 'em, bring 'em! Jellies, jellies!

Let's go, let's go! Keep doing it!

Come on, let's get moving!

Hurry up! What do ya think I'm paying ya for?

You don't pay me. We don't even exist.

We're just a clever visual metaphor used to personify

the abstract concept of thought.

One more crack like that and you're outta here!

No, please! I have three kids.

You know what I don't understand, though.

[grunting]

- What? - What's a gorilla doing under water

in the first place?

[grunting]

Uh, well, it's funny, you should-- I mean, you see that--

George, they're onto us!

Let's get outta here.

Ah!

Blood thirsty bikers!

And they're headed straight for Bikini Bottom!

I've got to warn everybody!

I'd better take the shortcut. Mr. Krabs!

SpongeBob, where in the blue barnacles, did you come from?

There's no time for that, Mr. Krabs!

Oh, Fred, I'm so sorry I drove that freight train onto your leg!

Ah!

- Ah, like, choo-choo. - My leg!

La, la, la, la, la. Flashbacks tickle.

Now, please go away.

Home of the Krabby Patty with a help wanted sign in the window.

For years I've been dreaming of this moment.

I'm going to go in there, march straight to the manager,

look him straight in the eye, lay her on the line and I can't do this!

Have you forgotten what you're looking for

knee deep in yesterday's top forty songs?

- Yes. - I'll give you a hint, two words.

First word, "my". Second word, "name tag".

Could I have another hint?

[screaming]

Well, it can't get any worse.

Oh!

I guess I spoke too soon.

Will SpongeBob learn to fly? Stay tuned.

Uh, Betty.

What? Oh, sweetie, I'm not Betty.

I just borrowed a uniform while mines at the cleaners.

Huh? Patrick!

[mumbling]

- Oh focus, Patrick, focus! - Okay.

Sunset?

The way I see it, the lad's got until sunset

before that bomb hits his lower intestine.

Hey, it's Mr. Krabs! Hi, Mr. Krabs!

[crying]

Okay, see ya later!

I'll give you stars.

[laughing]

Beautiful stars!

Oh, I want some.

Boink.

[laughing]

- Give me those. Ah! Ah! - Oh!

Uh.

[screaming]

Me appreciation is depreciating.

Ah! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

One dollar!

[crying]

Hello SpongeBob.

He's supposed to be here, somewhere. Ah ha!

Safety first.

[crying]

[crying]

All that glitters is not gold.

[crying]

Gee, pretty... Uncle Sherm won't let me watch TV back at home.

Why not?

That's why. What's that?

Ah, that's okay. There's nothing good on TV anyway.

Nothing.

[crying]

[crying]

Uh! Look, it worked!

Alright!

I guess crying does solve your problems, after all.

Ah! There is nothing better than the taste of natural jelly

from a jellyfish. See ya' later.

80,000 impressions later.

Would you please stop imitating me?

It is starting to get very annoying.

I figured a little good cop, bad cop would get his jaw flapping so I--

Oh! Can I be the bad cop? Please, please, can I, please?

Yes, if you get out of my hard-boiled narration!

Sorry.

Okay, I'm ready.

[breathing heavily]

I thought ya said we were riding through the park, Sandy!

[mumbling]

Go, Patrick, get those words! Get 'em good!

[mumbling]

At least it can't get more annoying.

[mumbling]

Hello!

[laughing]

[cheering]

Err!

[humming]

- Mr. Krabs. - What is it, lad?

Oh, all this fresh air feels great in my holes.

[whistling]

Oh, do I know you, young man?

Patrick, it's me! Remember?

♪ Who lives in a pineapple Under the sea? ♪

I don't know, ah, a wizard?

♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he? ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪

The one and only.

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪

Happy birthday to me.

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪

[cheering]

By the way, SpongeBob, how old are you?

Well, as of today, I am--

Don't worry, you'll see.

Ahem.

♪ Who lives in a pineapple Under the sea? ♪

- You do. - Ah!

[screaming]

Thanks for the pants Hans.

But could you help me with another problem?

Oh, hey, SpongeBob. I've got something for ya.

Yes, Patrick.

[cheering]

Gary, this is really one for the books, ay?

[laughing]

[meowing]

[laughing]

[laughing]

Just give away the big surprise, didn't I?

Oh, well, merry early Christmas!

Ho ho ho, you're a menace!