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♪ ♪ ♪ >> Stephen: HEY, WELCOME BACK,
EVERYBODY.
MY GUEST TONIGHT IS AN ACTOR YOU KNOW FROM "THE DA VINCI CODE,"
"MASTER AND COMMANDER," AND AS VISION IN THE MARVEL CINEMATIC
UNIVERSE.
HE NOW STARS IN "WANDAVISION."
>> SO...
>> YES, BUT IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE.
YOU ASKED HER TO DO IT.
>> WHY WOULD I HAVE DONE THAT?
>> TO SAVE THE UNIVERSE.
WELL, HALF OF IT.
>> DID IT WORK?
>> IT DID.
UNTIL THE BAD GUY REWOUND TIME.
THERE ARE A FEW EXTRA STEPS, BUT TO SET UP THE CONTEXT.
>> I CAME BACK AND DIED AGAIN.
>> AND SHE HAD TO WATCH.
OH, MAN, ANOTHER RED LIGHT!
OVERKILL OUT IN THE STICKS HERE, DON'T YOU THINK?
>> YES.
♪ ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE, I THINK, THAT ONE DAY
IS CREATING THESE IMPEDIMENTS TO STOP ME FROM RETURNING HOME.
>> Stephen: PLEASE WELCOME TO "A LATE SHOW," PAUL BETTANY!
>> Stephen: HI PAUL BETTANY, GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
>> NICE TO SEE YOU.
>> Stephen: I WANT TO GET TO "WANDAVISION" IN JUST A MINUTE.
I'M OBSESSED.
MY FAMILY AND I WATCH.
WE WATCHED THE "WATCH TOGETHER" FUNCTION ON THE DISNEY+, WHERE
EVERYBODY, WHEREVER YOU ARE, YOU CAN WATCH AT THE SAME TIME, AND
EVERYBODY CAN PAUSE AND GO, "WAIT, WAIT, GO BACK.
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?
WHAT WAS THAT EASTER EGG?" I WATCHED THE VIDEOS BREAKING
DOWN WHERE THE EASTER EGGS ARE, ALL THE FAN, YOU KNOW, FAN
THEORY VIDEOS.
I'M-- I'M COMPLETELY SWEPT.
IT'S THE ONLY THING PULLING ME THROUGH THE VERY END OF COVID
RIGHT NOW.
I CAN SEE THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL, AND YOU'RE--
YOU'RE MY CYBIL TAKING ME THROUGH THE DARK CAVES.
THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE, AND THANK YOU FOR DOING THE SHOW.
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH.
I FEEL LIKE-- I NOW FEEL SO MUCH PRESSURE ABOUT THE LAST EPISODE.
>> Stephen: YEAH, YOU SHOULD.
YOU SHOULD.
BEFORE WE GET TO THAT, THOUGH, ARE YOU ABOUT TO OR DID YOU JUST
TURN 50?
>> NO, I'M ABOUT-- I'M ABOUT TO TURN-- I'M ABOUT TO TURN 50,
YEAH.
>> Stephen: AND NOW, HOW LONG BEFORE YOU TURN 50?
DO YOU THINK YOU'VE GOT A SHOT AT CELEBRATING, LIKE, WITH AN
ACTUAL PARTY?
IT'S A BIG MILESTONE.
>> I GUESS IT'S-- I GUESS IT'S MAY 27.
>> Stephen: COULD BE.
>> I COULD GET THERE, I SUPPOSE.
I WAS-- I WAS QUITE ANXIOUS ABOUT IT, BUT THAT WAS LAST
YEAR, BECAUSE THE, YOU KNOW, LIFE PREPARES YOU FOR THESE
MOMENTS BY GIVING YOU SENIOR MOMENTS.
AND I THOUGHT I WAS TURNING 50 LAST YEAR.
LAUGH AND THEN I REALIZED I WASN'T, SO I ACTUALLY HAVE AN
EXTRA YEAR OF LIFE, WHICH IS GREAT!
>> Stephen: 49 IS A LITTLE YOUNG FOR A SENIOR MOMENT.
>> I DON'T KNOW.
I MEAN, MAYBE I WAS BURNING A CANDLE AT BOTH ENDS.
I DON'T KNOW.
>> Stephen: TOM HANKS TOLD A STORY ABOUT■ç YOU ON THE "GRAHAM
NORTON SHOW" ABOUT WHEN YOU WERE THE ALBINO ASSASSIN ON "THE DA
VINCI CODE."
DO YOU THINK THE STORY I'M TALKING ABOUT?
AND THAT YOU PUNCHED HIM IN THE STOMACH AND--
>> HE TOLD THE STORY OF ME MAKING HIM FART?
>> Stephen: I WANT TO KNOW IF THIS IS A TRUE STORY.
DID THIS REALLY HAPPEN?
>> YES, IT REALLY HAPPENED!
>> Stephen: PLEASE TELL THE PEOPLE-- TOM WAS FINE WITH
TELLING IT.
SO PLEASE, I WANT YOUR-- WAS THIS YOUR FIRST MOVIE?
>> IT WAS NOT MY FIRST MOVIE, BUT IT WAS MY FIRST SCENE WITH
TOM HANKS, THE BIGGEST MOVIE STAR IN THE WORLD.
>> Stephen: SURE.
>> AND I WAS VERY NERVOUS.
AND I CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S TOLD THIS STORY.
BUT NOW, LIKE THE SHACKLES ARE OFF.
YOU KNOW, I CAN-- I CAN TELL IT.
AND SO I-- I HAD TO GRAB HIM, AND I HAD TO PUNCH HIM IN THE
STOMACH.
AND IT'S VERY QUIET ON THE SET, RIGHT, BECAUSE THE SOUND AND
WHATEVER.
BUT IT'S ALWAYS MORE QUIET WHEN THERE'S A STUNT GOING ON BECAUSE
YOU'RE WORRIED SOMEBODY'S GOING TO GET HURT, SO EVERYBODY IS
LISTENING.
AND I PUNCHED HIM IN THE STOMACH, AND HE-- AND HE FARTED
REALLY, REALLY, REALLY LOUDLY EYE MEAN, BUT REALLY LOUDLY.
AND I-- I CAN'T-- I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THE FORM WAS.
LIKE, WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN THE BIGGEST MOVIE STAR IN THE WORLD
FARTS?
AND I KIND OF LOOKED AT HIM AND SAID, "WELL."
AND HE SAID, "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!
YOU JUST MADE ME FART."
I NEVER-- I NEVER REACHED THOSE HEIGHTS AGAIN.
>> Stephen: LET ME ASK YOU THIS: BECAUSE IT'S TOM HANKS WAS
THE FART REALLY RELATABLE.
>> IT'S AN EVERMAN FART.
>> Stephen: YOU'VE BEEN A BIG STAR FOR A LONG TIME NOW.
DO YOU REMEMBER THOSE EARLY, REALLY HARD AUDITIONS?
BECAUSE I-- I'M NO LONGER LIKE AN ACTOR, BUT I DID A MILLION OF
THEM MYSELF, AND THEY CAN BE ABSOLUTELY-- THE STRESS IS
CRUSHING.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: AND THEN SOMETIMES THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE TERRIBLE.
DO YOU REMEMBER PARTICULARLY HARD AUDITIONS WHEN YOU WERE A
YOUNG ACTOR?
>> YES, I DO.
AND THEY WERE ALL AWFUL.
AND I'M DYSLEXIC, SO I WORK REALLY HARD ON THEM.
AND THEN SOMETIMES, PEOPLE LIKE ROBERT DeNIRO, WOULD, LIKE,
MESS YOU AROUND AND THEY WOULD SAY, "HEY, COME AND AUDITION."
AND YOU WOULD PREPARE, AND THEN-- AND THEN THEY'D PUSH OFF
THE AUDITION DATE.
BUT I ALSO-- I HAD A BABY, AND SO I WAS GETTING, LIKE, MY WIFE
WAS WORKING.
>> Stephen: JENNIFER CONNOLLY.
>> YEAH, AND I WAS GETTING, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE TO COME IN AND LOOK
AFTER THE KID WHILE I WENT TO DO THE AUDITION.
AND THEN HE WOULD, AT THE LAST MINUTE, HE WOULD-- HE WOULD
RESCHEDULE.
SO FINALLY WHAT I DID WAS I JUST WORE MY BABY, AND I SHOWED UP.
>> Stephen: HOW DID IT GO?
>> NOT VERY WELL.
( LAUGHTER ) HE GAVE THE JOB TO MATT DAMON,
AND I GUESS MATT DAMON EYE SAW THE FILM.
HE PLAYED IT WITHOUT A BABY, WHICH I THOUGHT WAS WEIRD.
>> Stephen: IT'S AN EASY CHOICE.
IT'S A LAZY CHOICE, REALLY.
>> REALLY LAZY CHOICE.
>> Stephen: I WANT TO TALK ABOUT JARVIS AND VISION, WHEN
YOU FIRST, LIKE SAW WHAT VISION NEEDED TO LOOK LIKE, WERE YOU
SAYING TO YOURSELF, "GOD, GOD, PLEASE LET ME HAVE A GOOD BALD
HEAD?" BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO HAVE A
REALLY GOOD-SHAPED HEAD, LIKE A REALLY NICE, SYMMETRICAL HEAD.
DID YOU HAVE ANY DOUBTS THAT YOU COULD PULL OFF THE UNIFORM?
>> YES, I DID.
I THOUGHT THEY MIGHT HELP ME OUT WITH C.G., BUT IT TURNED OUT MY
BALT HEAD IS MY BEST FEATURE.
I'M LOOKING TO MY DOTAGE WITH, YOU KNOW, A LITTLE-- A LITTLE
OPTIMISM.
>> Stephen: WHAT ABOUT THE EARS?
BECAUSE THEY'RE COVERED UP.
I HATE PEOPLE TOUCHING MY EARS.
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE CUPS?
>> THAT'S SWEET OF YOU-- I WAS SAYING THIS TO YOUR PRODUCER.
I WAS SAYING THAT'S SO THOUGHTFUL OF HIM BECAUSE IT WAS
REALLY, REALLY PAINFUL.
IT'S FUN.
THEY'RE CLHSED OFF AND IT'S FINE.
AND THEN AFTER DAY TWO, IT BEGINS TO REALLY HURT.
SO THEN THEY MADE-- AND YOU CAN'T HEAR ANYBODY, WHICH IS
GREAT IF YOU'VE GOT, LIKE, A TERRIBLE DIRECTOR OR WHATEVER,
AND YOU JUST -- >> Stephen: SURE SURE, YEAH.
>> BUT THEN THEY POPPED OFF, AND NOW THEY JUST-- THEY JUST LEAVE
THEM OUT, AND THEY TAKE THEM OUT DIGITALLY.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE KIDDING.
SO IF I SAW YOU ON SET IT WOULD BE ALL VISION BUT THEN JUST...
>> THESE THINGS ARE HERE LIKE THIS, AND THEY SPEND LOTS AND
LOTS OF MONEY TAKING THESE OUT.
>> Stephen: NOW, EVERYBODY IN THE MARVEL UNIVERSE, OBVIOUSLY
ALL THE ACTORS, HAVE TO, LIKE, BASICALLY HAVE A SPOILER LOCK
BOX OVER THEIR MOUTH.
THEY CAN'T EVER GIVE ANYTHING AWAY.
I'M NOT GOING TO TRY TO, LIKE, MINE YOU FOR INFORMATION.
WHAT I WANT TO KNOW, IS THE SAME QUESTION I ASKED ROBERT DOWNEY
JR., ARE YOU GOOD AT KEEPING SECRETS?
>> I'M KIND OF-- I'M KIND OF GIFTED AT THAT, YES.
IT'S-- IT'S IT'S A STRONG SUIT OF MINE.
MY DAD WAS-- I COME FROM A THEATRICAL FAMILY.
MY DAD WAS ALWAYS LIKE, "YOU NEVER LET THE AUDIENCE SEE YOU
IN YOUR COSTUME AND YOUR MAKEUP BEFORE THE CURTAIN OPENS."
SO I SORT OF HAD THAT THING IN-- I DON'T WANT TO KNOW HOW THE
MAGIC TRICK IS DONE.
I DON'T LIKE DEG E.P.K., AND I DON'T LIKE EYE DON'T LIKE ANY OF
THAT BEHIND-THE-SCENES STUFF.
I WOULD RATHER IT WAS ALL JUST THE MAGIC TRICK AND NONE OF THE
WORKINGS!
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK, BUT WE'LL BE BACK
WITH MORE OF VISION HIMSELF, PAUL BETTANY.
♪ ♪ ♪