Where?

Australia?

Yes, 100%.

Please.

Please.

Absolutely buzzing out there.

Yeah, we should do it, shouldn't we?

Yes, but by the time we've done the mandatory quarantine, we'll have all been fired.

It's the network would be like one.

Although that would be fun.

Do the show from a hotel room in quarantine, Coming fun for, like, an hour.

Well, that's how long the show is.

So they were after that.

What are you Are you saying that we have a fun hour every night?

I think the audience at home would disagree.

I think if you piece up the best bits of the week, we scraped 48 minutes of fun and the rest the rest is just like the best we've got is a bow talking about sizzle.

Do you want to do the headlines, Ian?

You What do you?

Your co head writer on the show Permanent fixture in that corner.

Do you want to do the headlines now?

Uh huh.

Wow.

Co head and Cambria says no.

Lauren is the other co head writer.

Lauren joins in the headlines.

No, go ahead.

I honestly thought you were gonna save me.

Then you looked at me like, come to me because he's really put you in a corner.

I'll save you.

You don't want to do the headlines either.

Really?

So no headlines.

Yeah.

No, that's fine, John.

How do you feel about it?

You were very involved in the writing of the headlines today.

I think my part of it's done.

My mom was done.

Read it or don't, Buddy, I'll get paid.

Either way, I'll be here tomorrow.

Doesn't matter.

All right, Well, you were doing them because Donald Trump gave the keynote address at the Conservative Political Action Conference yesterday and he started his speech like this.

Well, thank you very much.

And hello, CPAC.

Do you miss me yet?

Do you, mister?

And I think I speak for everyone when I say no.

Mhm.

Miss you been gone a month.

That hasn't even been enough time for Mike Pence's hair to return to his natural pre campaign length.

Trump said, Did you miss me?

Which is literally what every movie villain says when they come back.

Did you miss me?

Did you miss me?

Did you Did you miss me, Richie?

Because I've missed you.

Did everybody see this?

Japanese billionaire Yusaku Miyazawa is seeking eight volunteers for the first SpaceX flight around the moon in 2023.

Applications are now open for the trip, which will be completely paid for by the billionaire.

So that guy is definitely hunting these people on the moon.

Right?

We thought this was interesting.

In order to protect vaccines from being stolen, shipping companies are now using quote James bond level security measures, including panic buttons, kill switches and undercover guards.

The name's chance Johnson.

I don't know why I put an American accent.

Why don't do that?

It's like we're doing Bond, in case you didn't.

Yeah.

Why don't do that?

The most iconic British character outside of Paddington.

You're predicting the next James Bond won't be British?

I think he will be British.

You really think so?

I think so.

I don't know.

Who do you think the next bond will be?

You've got to put your money right now on someone.

Who is it?

You know, I wanted it to be interesting because I think that that would have been cool.

But gosh, it's a hard one, man.

It's really I think it might be a British man.

He's almost too beautiful to be James Bond.

You're absolutely right.

He's absolutely right.

He's so gorgeous that it's like I feel bad enough to get beat up.

But then if it was by a guy that good looking, he wouldn't have to kill anybody.

They do it to themselves.

He doesn't have the eyes.

He doesn't have the eyes of a killer like Daniel Craig.

He's hot.

Don't get me wrong.

He's like, but he's rugged, you know?

He's hot.

But he could.

He could.

He could be an uber driver.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Five.

Wrong turns in his life and he's an uber driver.

Three.

Wrong choices.

Three.

Wrong choices.

You're like tipping 20%.

He was pretty hot.

Okay, I'm always shocked in bond that when he says the name is Bond James Bond, nobody goes.

Oh, from the films.

Yeah, not one character, not one character in bond Just watched a bond movie.

I'm constantly amazed.

They're like, Oh, my God, From their films based on the inflaming books.

You're that guys, Not one.

So anyway, back to the original show.

Okay?

The name is Johnson, Johnson and Johnson.

Wow.

a really itchy nose.

I'm trying to itch it in a discreet way when actually what I really need to do.

You ever get that?

You have, like, a full nose attack.

That was your discrete itch.

No, I Here's your whole arm.

What?

I didn't use my whole arm.

I was trying to do it at moments when I thought they might have cut you guys.

I'm trying to do it as I throw it out.

Quick it back.

So you know what I mean?

Like I go, Don't you think in?

Yeah, yeah.

Thinking in the edit.

But what I really need to do is go.

Yeah, yeah.

Ah, I stayed up all night watching videos on YouTube and learning new things I will now share said things with you.

This is tonight.

I learned.

Do not I learned that was appalling.

Mm.

That was appalling.

That was absolutely appalling.

That I mean, that is that is that was a disgrace to jingles.

Yeah.

How did that happen?

I don't think we remember.

We were supposed to do it.

Oh, really?

To be creative.

You don't think you remembered you were supposed to do or you were just for all of us.

So shut out of the show.

You don't try again?

Yes.

Give it, please.

Yeah.

Are you gonna say your thing?

Did you say it, or are you gonna say it again or we just play?

How do you want to do?

Is this the same plane?

Are you going to say it?

And then we do it?

Uh, what am I gonna kill us?

Classic.

Stay in place.

All cars.

Oh, gosh.

Technically, this is a This is a T V show.

And here's some big international use.

Former French President Nicolas Sarkozy was sentenced to jail today on corruption charges related to campaign finances.

The judge told Sarkozy his biggest mistake was not committing these crimes in America.

It sounds harsh a year in prison, but you've got to remember French prison is done entirely with mine.

Okay, I wonder what French prisons like what you like in French prisons?

Like, I bet it's like Paddington two level prison.

I bet it's correct.

You think Paddington two level prison.

Ah, yeah.

There's a lot of chains.

Do you think Rachel and Cheese?

Yeah, it's like I mean, but like the lowest quality cheese, which is still higher than most other countries.

Yeah, it's low quality French cheese, which here in America, you can only get in Whole Foods for $500.

How do you eat that stuff?

Yeah.

Oh, I can do French.

Yeah.

No, Absolutely not.

Okay.

I felt I felt with the French.

You just have to debase yourself in front of him immediately.

And then they're nice to you.

When I went to France, I was like, I'm so sorry.

I'm a stupid American.

I don't speak French.

I'm an idiot.

I'm the worst.

And then they're like, Come on me.

And it's all right.

Yeah.

Mexican restaurant, Was it?

Yeah, that's right.

Italian restaurant, Italian.

Are you sure you're in France?

Is there?

It's like, Come on in.

Let's hit your Madonna.

Yeah, you can do an English accent.

They can Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

So it's Go on.

Yeah, it's all right.

Yeah, It's a bit of English accent.

It's an Englishman who just inhaled a helium balloon.

That it's all right.

It's all right.

You all right?

They don't know.

Yeah.

Yeah, Well, that was fun.

Amazing headlines.

Mhm.