the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues.

寫在簡歷的美德跟寫在悼詞中的美德的區別

The résumé virtues are the ones you put on your résumé,

顯而易見，放在簡歷中的優點

which are the skills you bring to the marketplace.

是你向公眾展示你的技能

The eulogy virtues are the ones

然而，悼詞中出現的德行

that get mentioned in the eulogy,

那些人們在喪禮中提到的特質

which are deeper: who are you, in your depth,

你更深層的本質，

what is the nature of your relationships,

人際關係的模式，

are you bold, loving, dependable, consistency?

你是否勇敢、有愛心、值得信賴、持之以恆？

And most of us, including me, would say

大部分人中，包括我在內，會覺得

that the eulogy virtues are the more important of the virtues.

悼詞中的美德比其他形式的美德更重要。

But at least in my case, are they the ones that

但是依我看來，它們是我最常想到的嗎？

I think about the most? And the answer is no.

其實不是

So I've been thinking about that problem,

所以我一直在思考這個問題，

and a thinker who has helped me think about it

而一名思想家幫助了我

is a guy named Joseph Soloveitchik, who was a rabbi

他的名字是約瑟夫 .斯洛維奇克，一名猶太神學家

who wrote a book called "The Lonely Man Of Faith" in 1965.

他在1965年寫了一本書，名字叫《孤獨的信仰之人》

Soloveitchik said there are two sides of our natures,

斯洛維奇克講述說每個人都有兩個特性

which he called Adam I and Adam II.

一個是亞當第一，另外一個是亞當第二

Adam I is the worldly, ambitious,

亞當第一是追逐名利，有野心的

external side of our nature.

代表我們表露的特性

He wants to build, create, create companies,

亞當第一想建立事業，

create innovation.

開創創新。

Adam II is the humble side of our nature.

亞當第二代表著人性中謙遜的一面

Adam II wants not only to do good but to be good,

他不僅僅想做好事，而是想做好人，

to live in a way internally

這是一種内在的生活方式－－

that honors God, creation and our possibilities.

敬重神明，這大千世界跟我們的無限可能。

Adam I wants to conquer the world.

亞當第一想要征服這個世界

Adam II wants to hear a calling and obey the world.

亞當第二想要傾聽並服從內心的召喚。

Adam I savors accomplishment.

亞當第一傾心於成就，

Adam II savors inner consistency and strength.

亞當第二欣賞內在的堅持與力量。

Adam I asks how things work.

亞當第一會關心事情如何運作，

Adam II asks why we're here.

亞當第二會問”我們為何在這裡"。

Adam I's motto is "success."

亞當第一的座右銘是“成功”

Adam II's motto is "love, redemption and return."

亞當第二的座右銘是“愛，救贖與給予”

And Soloveitchik argued that these two sides

斯洛維奇克認為，

of our nature are at war with each other.

人性的兩面會發生衝突。

We live in perpetual self-confrontation

我們生活在永久的自我對峙中：

between the external success and the internal value.

外在的成功跟內在的價值是衝突的。

And the tricky thing, I'd say, about these

而對我而言最難以捉摸的事情，

two sides of our nature is they work

人性的兩面

by different logics.

是靠不同的邏輯方式運轉的。

The external logic is an economic logic:

外在的邏輯是顧全經濟效益的邏輯:

input leads to output, risk leads to reward.

輸入帶來輸出，冒險引導出獎勵。

The internal side of our nature

我們的內在一面

is a moral logic and often an inverse logic.

是一種道德的邏輯，常常不合乎常理。

You have to give to receive.

要施捨才能獲得。

You have to surrender to something outside yourself

你必須要放棄外在東西，

to gain strength within yourself.

才能讓自己的內在更強大。

You have to conquer the desire to get what you want.

你要征服自私的欲望。

In order to fulfill yourself, you have to forget yourself.

為了滿足你自己，你要去忘掉你自己

In order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself.

為了找到你自己，你要先去迷失你自己

We happen to live in a society that favors Adam I,

我們當今生活在一個對亞當第一有利的社會中，

and often neglects Adam II.

並且經常疏忽亞當第二。

And the problem is, that turns you into a shrewd animal

問題是，這讓人變成了精明的動物，

who treats life as a game,

把生活當成了一場遊戲，

and you become a cold, calculating creature

然後人們變成了一種冷酷，會算計的生物，

who slips into a sort of mediocrity

不知不覺的就變成了一個平庸的人：

where you realize there's a difference

你會發現你渴望的自己

between your desired self and your actual self.

和現實中的自己不大相同。

You're not earning the sort of eulogy you want,

你不在積攢你想要的悼詞，

you hope someone will give to you.

你希望其他人會給你的那種。

You don't have the depth of conviction.

你沒有堅定的信念，

You don't have an emotional sonorousness.

沒有動人的情感。

You don't have commitment to tasks

在那些需要花一輩子去經營的任務中，

that would take more than a lifetime to commit.

你並沒有投身於其中。

I was reminded of a common response through history

這讓我想起歷史中常見的，

of how you build a solid Adam II,

建造一個扎實的亞當第二的方法。

how you build a depth of character.

你怎麼去發掘亞當第二的深度

Through history, people have gone back

回歸歷史

into their own pasts,

人們回到自己的過去

sometimes to a precious time in their life,

回到很珍貴的那段時期，童年

to their childhood,

經常

and often, the mind gravitates in the past

思緒會被牽引至過去的

to a moment of shame,

曾經羞愧的那一刻，

some sin committed, some act of selfishness,

回到你犯下錯誤的時候，

an act of omission, of shallowness,

你自私自利的時候。

the sin of anger, the sin of self-pity,

你忽略其他人的時候,淺薄的時候

trying to be a people-pleaser, a lack of courage.

生氣的時候

Adam I is built by building on your strengths.

自憐自哀的時候

Adam II is built by fighting your weaknesses.

跟不停的取悅他人,

You go into yourself, you find the sin

迷失自己的勇氣的時刻。

which you've committed over and again through your life,

亞當第一

your signature sin

是在我們的優勢上建立而成

out of which the others emerge,

亞當第二

and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin,

是在我們與我們的弱點戰鬥時建立而成

and out of that wrestling, that suffering,

你要反省你自己，

then a depth of character is constructed.

找到你根深蒂固的罪惡，

And we're often not taught to recognize

那個最屬於你的，

the sin in ourselves,

帶來其他罪惡的根源。

in that we're not taught in this culture

然後你去與你的罪惡搏鬥

how to wrestle with it,

除了搏鬥以外

how to confront it, and how to combat it.

你要去忍受。

We live in a culture with an Adam I mentality

最後，深刻的個性才開始成形

where we're inarticulate about Adam II.

我們沒有被教導如何學習認知

Finally, Reinhold Niebuhr

我們人性中的罪惡

summed up the confrontation, the fully lived

我們在這個文化中也沒學習到

Adam I and Adam II life, this way:

怎麼與我們的罪惡搏鬥

"Nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime;

怎麼去面對罪惡

therefore we must be saved by hope.

跟怎麼戰勝我們的罪惡

Nothing which is true or beautiful or good makes

我們生活在一個崇尚第一亞當的社會中

complete sense in any immediate context of history;

也是對第二亞有者模糊概念的社會。

therefore we must be saved by faith.

最後，雷茵霍爾德 尼布爾

Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone;

對亞當第一和第二的對立

therefore we must be saved by love.

給予了這樣的總結：

No virtuous act is quite as virtuous

“沒有一件值得去做的事情，可以在你這一生中完成”

from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own standpoint.

“因此我們必須心存希望。”

Therefore we must be saved by that final form of love,

“沒有一件美麗，真實的東西，”

which is forgiveness.”

“會馬上被人欣賞，”

Thanks.

“‘因此我們要心存信念。”

(Applause)

"我們不能獨自完成任何一件事情，就算是善意的，"