We’re here in San Diego State University

我們現在在聖地牙哥州立大學，

and we’re asking college girls the age-old question,

我們要來問大學女生一個老問題：

“Does size matter?”

「你會在意男生老二的大小嗎？」

You’re watching SimpleSexyStupid

你現在正在收看「簡單性感的蠢蛋」

Does size matter?

你會在意男生的大小嗎？

Size of what?

什麼大小？

Penis

老二

Yes

對

Yes… yes

對…對

Yah

對啊！

Yeah! Oh…

對啊！喔…

Oh no. I don’t know.

喔不，我不知道。

Just be real with us.

就誠實跟我們說吧！

We all know it does matter.

我們都知道妳們會在意。

A little bit

一點點

I thought you’re telling me about the height.

我覺得妳正要告訴我長度。

Yeah! We’re all talking about the height.

對啊！我們正在討論長度啊！

Penis height

老二的長度

I’d say it matters only if like it’s that small.

我會說我在不在意在於它是不是真的那麼小。

If they don’t know how to work it.

如果他們不知道要怎麼用它

Okay. So even if it’s like one inch?

好，所以甚至只有大約一英吋？

No… (You’re cool with it?)

不，妳是認真的嗎？

No…No…

不…不…

Oh, damn it! What am I gonna do?

喔，該死！那我到底該怎麼做？

What do you think? (I think it matters.)

你覺得呢？(我覺得我會在意。)

Like not that much (Okay so…)

不要太大(好，所以…)

Because guys can make things work

因為男人可以把那件事情做好。

Does penis size matter?

會在意男生老二的大小嗎？

Absolutely but it doesn’t even if you know what you’re doing with it.

絕對會在意啊，但如果你知道你在做什麼，那就不是很重要了。

Even if it’s one inch penis?

甚至只有一英吋？

If he knows what he’s doing, he can make it work.

如果他知道他要做什麼，他就可以讓那件事情順利完成。

Put down that Starbucks and let me ask you a question.

放下那杯星巴克，讓我問你一個問題。

Does size matter?

會在意男生老二的大小嗎？

Oh yeah, it does matter.

喔，會啊，會在意啊！

So what do you think is the perfect penis size then?

所以你覺得什麼大小是最合適的？

Average and above as long as they know how to use it.

如果他們知道怎麼使用它的話，一般長度就好了。

Above normal as long as it is not scary.

只要不要太恐怖，比一般長一點比較好。

Seven and a half

7.5英吋

Give me your hands.

借我你的手

Ahm…

啊…

Now we’re holding hands.

我們牽手了，

Now we’re a couple.

我們是情侶了，

So what’s the perfect penis size?

所以你心目中的完美尺寸是多少？

Give me inches

以英吋為單位

Seven

7英吋

Six and a half

6.5英吋

Six… Six? Oh no, I still like seven.

6…6？喔不，我還是喜歡7英吋。

Well, I read in Cosmo that the average is like six.

嗯，我讀過太空學，書上說平均是6英吋。

That big

那樣大

Six inches up if you’re not experienced

如果沒有經驗的人要6英吋以上，

but if you’re good, then it can be smaller.

但如果你技術很好，就可以小一點。

What’s the perfect penis size?

完美的老二長度是多少？

Oh! Really not beating around the bush there

喔！真直接啊！

I don’t want it to be so big that it hurts.

我不想要太大，那樣會受傷。

You gotta have some meat to it.

你必須要有點肉

Some meat? (It can’t be a pencil).

一些肉？(不可能是鉛筆)

Like some girth?

你是指周長嗎？

Girth… girth

周長…周長

So you like huge chodes?

所以你喜歡大雞雞？

No, I didn’t say that.

不，我沒有那樣說。

So what’s the perfect penis size?

所以完美的老二長度是多少？

I’m sorry. Was there something I said?

對不起，我剛剛有說什麼嗎？

What is your worst penis experience?

可以說說你最爛的經驗嗎？

It being very very small.

對方的那裡非常非常小。

No small penis experiences in my life

我不允許小老二在我的生活中出現。

So you only date black guys?

所以你只和黑人約會嗎？

Pretty much

幾乎是

Way too small… It wasn’t pleasurable.

太小的話，不能讓人心情舒暢。

Uhh! I’m very sorry to hear that.

噢！我很遺憾聽到那事。

Maybe I can make it pleasurable for you.

或許我可以讓你開心一點。

Maybe after this interview. Yeah?

或許在這個採訪之後，好嗎？

Oh yeah yeah

喔，好啊！好啊！

Yeah?! I’m in!

好？我被錄取了？

Yes! Whooo!

耶！太好了！

Worst penis experience

最爛的老二經驗

Nothing there

沒有

Kind of like soft on you?

對你來說，會不會太軟？

That’s like sad for me.

那對我來說好像有點難過

Uhh! I swear if I was ever with you, I would never be soft.

啊！我發誓如果我和你在一起，我絕不會軟掉。

Okay, like right now, I’m fully erect right now.

好，像現在，我就非常硬。

Let’s say things are getting hot and heavy with this guy

如果來了一個性感又壯碩的男人，

your boyfriend or whatever

你男朋友或是其他男人，

Things are getting hot and you pull down his pants and you see his two-inch penis.

你們越來越火熱，而當你拉下他的褲子，你卻看到他的老二只有2英吋，

What will you do?

你會怎麼做？

Pull his pants back up and walk away.

把他褲子穿回去並掉頭就走。

Scream and run away

尖叫，然後跑走

Say peace and walk out

說和平，然後走出去

I mean I guess you’re kind of obligated.

我的意思是說我覺得你也有點責任。

You know you can look pasta.

你知道你可以看著麵條

What’s the biggest penis you’ve ever had to deal with?

可以說說你見過最大的老二嗎？

Oh God… I… Besides mine

喔天啊！我…除了我的

Seven is like the biggest

7英吋是最大的

What is the smallest penis you’ve ever had to deal with?

可以說說你見過最小的老二嗎？

Not as long as my iPhone

沒比我的手機長

So what happened? You walked out?

所以發生什麼事了？你掉頭就走嗎？

No. I had to use the restroom and then I walked out.

沒有，我必須要用廁所，之後我就走掉了。

How big do you think my penis is?

你覺得我的老二多大？

Five to six

5到6英吋

It’s actually pretty generous.

你真的非常慷慨

Maybe like four and a half (4 ½) to five and a half (5 ½)

大概4或4.5英吋到5或5.5英吋

Oh, that’s so pretty generous for me.

喔，你對我真是慷慨啊！

Alright. Thank you so much for watching this video.

好啦！非常感謝你收看本節目。

If you enjoyed it, please make sure to hit that subscribe button.

如果你喜歡，請訂閱我們的節目。

Drop me like and drop me comment

請說喜歡，並回應我的留言，

and let me know if you like the video.

並讓我知道你喜歡這部影片。

Until next time!

下次見！

I will see you!

下次見！