What do we need to do to get out of the Kelp Forest?

I'm lost!

[music playing]

[music playing]

[music playing]

[giggling]

Wey wook, it's Widward.

What? [SpongeBob, Patrick laughing]

What's that supposed to be? Some kind of stupid secret code?

We can't tell you 'cause you're not a member of the club.

What does it take to be a member,

besides being a moron?

Sorry, Squidward,

but you couldn't get in even if you tried!

Huh? You should be begging me to join!

You can't join! Can't join!

You can't get in!

[grunting]

Well, this is stupid. There's no room up here!

That's what we've been trying to tell you!

We've been stuck up here for three days.

I do not now, nor will I ever,

want to be a member of your stupid club!

[screaming]

Oh, no. We're stuck... in the middle of nowhere...

with SpongeBob and Patrick!

We have this!

Oh, Magic Conch Shell,

what do we need to do to get out of the Kelp Forest?

Nothing.

The shell has spoken!

Nothing?! We can't just sit here and do nothing!

I'm gonna find my way back to sanity!

Oh, I'm lost!

[panting]

[laughing]

Huh?

[Squidward] There's no way out of here.

Mmm-mmm-mmm. I wonder what's on the menu

for Club Squidward tonight?

Ahh.

[sizzling]

Doesn't that smell good, SpongeBob?

You haven't eaten in days.

If you had listened to me, you'd have food, shelter,

and a roaring fire.

But instead, you listened to a talking clam.

As if the answers to all your problems

will fall right out of the sky! [laughing]

Praise the Magic Conch!

To the club!

Uh, yeah.

Now, uh, if you'll excuse me... What shall I eat first?

The spaghetti, the turkey, the soup, the canned meat?

Why don't you ask... the Magic Conch, Squidward?

Right after I consult the Magic Toenail.

The conch is the one who gave us this banquet.

This copyrighted conch is the cornerstone

of our organization.

Maybe he's not a brother.

Hey, y-you guys have it all wrong.

Magic Conch, uh, I was wondering...

uh, should I have the spaghetti or the turkey?

Neither.

Oh, then how about the soup?

No.

Here, let me try.

Magic Conch,

could Squidward have some of this yummy, delicious,

super-terrific sandwich?

No.

Hmm... Could I have this yummy, delicious,

super-terrific sandwich?

Yes.

Alright!

[vacuuming]

[burping]

- Could I have something to eat? - No.

- Could I have something to eat? - No.

Can't you say anything else but no?

Try asking again.

Can I have something to eat?

No.

[grumbling]

Hello? Anyone there? Hello? Hello?!

[gasping]

You don't know how happy I am to see you.

I have been stranded out here for weeks

with-with- with these two barnacle heads

and their Magic Conch Shell!

Magic... Conch Shell?

You mean like this?!

Abra.

My conch told me to come save you guys.

All right, Magic Conch... what do we do now?

Nothing.

All hail the Magic Conch!

All hail the magic conch!

[music playing]

[music playing]