and we've spent a lot of this series on how various gods created the earth,

but now it's time to look at one way they destroy it.

Today's topic..

is floods.

Oh!

Thoth put his swimtrunks on!

Thoth put his swimtrunks on! All right, we're all ready, let's get started!

(water noise)

(Mike's wearing defective water wings)

*Egyption myth-trivia*

*Greek myth-trivia*

*Indian myth-trivia*

*Norse myth-trivia*

You're probably familiar with the story of the flood from the Bible,

featuring Noah and the Ark, but

it turns out that alot of cultures have flood myths.

One explanation for this is the belief that myths are rooted in history.

--remember Euhemerism?

Plus many of the earliest, complex societies grew around rivers--

--which would flood. Most of the time, that flooding was neither predictable,

nor helpful; except for the Nile river, whose floods were regular,

provided water for irrigation, and-

-were thought to be of divine significance.

Just ask Sobek, crocodile-headed god of the Nile's floods.

Despite his frightening teeth, he also has a reputation for healing or protection in some stories.

-Anyway, flood myths may also reflect a common theme in some of the myths we've examined:

The idea that creation's source..

..is PRIMORDIAL WATERS.

if water can bring life, it stands to reason,

it can also bring...

it can also bring... DEATH.

You can see the symbolism in various purification rituals like baptisms,

or

prenuptial cleansings.

They serve as tiny reenactments of floods

-where an old life is destroyed and a new life begins.

A tiny made-to-order single-serving flood:

adorable..

and destructive

Let's begin in ancient Mesopotamia with one of our favorite mythical sources:

The Epic of Gilgamesh

Thought bubble?

What you got?

At the beginning of this particular story

the hero, Utnapishtim, is talking to Gilgamesh

about living in the city of Shurupakk on the banks of the Euphrates.

He explains that a group of Gods,

Anu,

Anu, Enlil,

Anu, Enlil, Ninurta,

Anu, Enlil, Ninurta, Ennugi,

Anu, Enlil, Ninurta, Ennugi, and Ea

Anu, Enlil, Ninurta, Ennugi, and Ea put their divine heads together..

..and decided to flood the place.

luckily for Utnapishtim, Ea has second thoughts,

and sneaks over to spill the beans.

Ea secretly tells Utnapishtim what's going down,

and orders him to leave his home,

all his possessions,

and to build a boat,

which will carry the seed of all living things.

Utnapishtim's boat is...

Utnapishtim's boat is... MASSIVE

--an acre in circumference, with six enormous decks.

Utnapishtim and his family loaded up with everything there was:

all the silver, gold, and seeds of every living thing;

his kith, and his kin and the wild beasts, and all kinds of craftsmen--

--and also shuffleboard!

--and also shuffleboard and a killer buffet!

--and also shuffleboard and a killer buffet! (I assume)

When the hour of destruction arrives, the gods send down a terrifying storm.

So terrifying that even the gods were afraid of the flood-weapon.

and when they see what they've done to their creation,

the Gods,

the Gods, humbled,

the Gods, humbled, sat there...

the Gods, humbled, sat there... weeping.

(Whoops!)

The storm rages for seven days before eventually blowing itself out.

Utnapishtim looks out of a porthole and sees that all of mankind has been destroyed

--and he weeps.

He's just become the world's first cruise ship captain..

under VERY unfortunate circumstances.

His boat comes aground on mount Nimush,

and Utnapishtim sends out birds to search for dry land.

First,

First, a dove comes back,

First, a dove comes back, because there was no place to perch,

then,

then, the swallow returns,

finally,

finally, he sends out a raven,

and when it doesn't return,

and when it doesn't return, he knows dry land is out there...

somewhere.

He makes a sacrifice to the gods,

and am-scrays off that oat-bay, lickety-split.

Thank you, thought bubble!

So,

So, the flood destroys mankind,

So, the flood destroys mankind, but..

..it doesn't end there.

..it doesn't end there. Enlil, the brains behind the decision to destroy humanity,

sees that Utnapishtim and his family,

sees that Utnapishtim and his family, and also probably the craftsmen,

-have survived! And he can't believe his eyes!

What sort of life survived?

What sort of life survived? No man should have lived through the destruction.

Ea, who had told Utnapishtim to build the giant boat, chimes in:

"You are the sage of the gods, warrior,"

"so how,"

"so how, oh how"

"so how, oh how could you fail to consult and impose the flood?"

"Punish the sinner for his sin,"

"Punish the sinner for his sin, punish the criminal for his crime, but-"

"-ease off, let work not cease, be patient..."

Ea tries to instill some moderation in Enlil,

and suggests that maybe, in the future, he could just send like

a lion,

a lion, or a wolf

a lion, or a wolf or a plague..

you know, something mild...

you know, something mild... like a plague.

Apparently this satisfies Enlil, because he shrugs,

pops on down to Utnapishtim's boat and

touches him on the forehead to make him

touches him on the forehead to make him immortal.

I guess it all works out in the end for Utnapishtim.

You know they say: All's Well that Ends Well

-or doesn't end at all, ever, because it's immortal.

So, this all probably sounds familiar to those of you who know the flood story from the Bible.

I don't remember Noah having room for every piece of gold and silver alongside all those animals, but

both stories have angry divinities who order

a chosen person person to build a big boat, and fill it with wildlife.

Then, birds are sent to find land after the boat gets stuck on a mountain.

There are a number of important differences though, too.

First of all, the reason the Babylonian gods decided to destroy humanity is..

well, its unclear.

well, its unclear. in one version it's because

humans are making too much noise which,

humans are making too much noise which, okay,

humans are making too much noise which, okay, fair,

humans are making too much noise which, okay, fair, Keep it down you kids!

Don't make me send a..

Don't make me send a.. deluge..

Don't make me send a.. deluge.. down there

Don't make me send a.. deluge.. down there and literally destroy you.

In the Old Testament the flood is punishment for mankind's sinfulness.

As the book tells it,

"God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the Earth,"

"and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart

"and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually."

"And it repented the Lord that he had made man on the Earth,

"And it repented the Lord that he had made man on the Earth, and it grieved him at his heart."

"And the Lord said,"

"I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the Earth;"

both man,

both man, and beast,

both man, and beast, and creeping things,

and the fowls of the air,

for it repenteth me that I have made them.

Which,

Which, I mean, man!

Which, I mean, man! I don't LOVE the creeping things, but...

I don't want them DESTROYED,

I don't want them DESTROYED, What about Anansi?

Yahweh commands Noah to build a boat, like Ea did with Utnapishtim, but

Yahwah gives Noah even more detailed instructions.

He's also less efficient when it comes to the rainstorm.

It takes Yahweh 40 days to do what the Babylonian gods did in seven!

Then again, those Babylonians were working as a team.

Like the Sumerian myth, Noah celebrates his survival with a sacrifice.

This seems to make Yahweh feel both relieved and...

sorry..

sorry.. for

sorry.. for destroying the world.

He says, "I will not again curse the ground any more for man's sake;

for the imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth;

neither will I again smite anymore every living thing

neither will I again smite anymore every living thing as I have done."

Whoops, again!

Yahweh doesn't make Noah immortal, like Utnapishtim, but--

--he does promise Noah that he and his sons will replenish the Earth,

and he gives them all the living things of the Earth for food,

along with some rules for how they should be eaten;

which,

which, I mean, that's got to be pretty disappointing for those animals,

which, I mean, that's got to be pretty disappointing for those animals, right?

Like, "YAY! We survived the floo-

Like, "YAY! We survived the floo- you're gonne do WHAT?!?"

Most important, at least for this episode, is that Yahweh establishes a covenant with Noah

and promises that he will never have another flood destroy the Earth again.

Somewhere in-between the inscrutable Babylonian flood,

Somewhere in-between the inscrutable Babylonian flood, and the sin-cleansing biblical flood,

is the Zoroastrian flood.

This is a myth that comes to us from ancient Iran.

It also features a lone survivor, named Yima,

who gathers two of each species to repopulate the Earth.

but, rather than building a boat,

Yima gathers the animals in his mountain-castle,

which is high enough to survive the rising floodwaters.

The creator God, Ahura Mazda, decides that the Earth needs a new beginning--not because of sin,

but because its overwhelmed by the constant multiplication of its immortal beings.

This suggests that, prior to the flood, Earth's inhabitants were immortal.

And it's only after this cleansing that we have a world in which..

stuff dies.

In yet another flood myth, this one from Ovid's "Metamorphoses,"

Jupiter decides to destroy mortals for their sinfulness.

Jupiter seems to be worried that humans might contaminate other Earthly beings.

which,

which, I mean,

which, I mean, yeah,

Same!

The gods don't all agree with Jupiter,

but they assent to his decision because..

but they assent to his decision because.. he's the boss.

They're sad because they'll miss all the delicious sacrifices that humans gave them,

but they agree that a flood is better than a fire,

because fires can get out of control,

and then reach up to Olympus.

Gods, only YOU can prevent heaven fires!

so Jupiter gets together with Neptune,

who pumps up the rivers, and whips up some high winds, and..

flood!

There's no chosen survivors for Jupiter, he's trying to just wipe the slate clean.

But, luckily for Humanity, two people:

Deucalion

Deucalion and Pyrrha

Deucalion and Pyrrha are fortunate enough to survive and so.. life carries on.

Jupiter obviously notices that these two

dodged his wrath but he's so impressed with Deucalion and Pyrrha's piety..

..that he spares them.

Like Utnapishtim and Noah, they give thanks in prayer,

--and, like Noah, they're tasked with repopulating the world.

They do that by throwing stones over their shoulders, which become more humans.

And that, kids,

And that, kids, is how babies are made!

And that, kids, is how babies are made. --no follow-up questions!

Today we learned that gods in the ancient Mediterranean world seemed...