in mental health around the world,

在世界各地的心理健康方面。

which is why we're so committed to creating more content

這就是為什麼我們如此致力於創造更多的內容

than we ever have.

比我們曾經有過的更多。

Thanks for being a part of our journey.

感謝你成為我們旅程的一部分。

Hey, Psych2Goers.

嘿，Psych2Goers。

We're about to get real deep today,

我們今天要真正深入瞭解。

so this is your invitation to mentally prepare.

所以這是你的邀請，讓你在心理上做好準備。

Are you single,

你是單身嗎。

and you feel like you'll never be in a relationship?

而你覺得你永遠不會有一段感情？

Why do you feel that way?

你為什麼會有這種感覺？

If you're watching this,

如果你正在看這個。

it might be that you believe your appearance

可能是你認為你的外表

is the reason for your single status.

是你單身狀態的原因。

A lot of us have felt the same at some point,

我們很多人在某些時候都有同樣的感覺。

but this is not fact, it's perception,

但這不是事實，是看法。

both your perception of yourself

既是你對自己的看法

and how others perceive you.

以及別人對你的看法。

So let's talk about why you are not too ugly

是以，讓我們來談談為什麼你不會太難看

for a relationship

為一個關係

and how to change this perception.

以及如何改變這種看法。

Here are four things you can do

以下是你可以做的四件事

to help you not feel too ugly to be in a relationship.

以幫助你不至於覺得自己太過醜陋而無法進入一段關係。

Number one, question, where did these feelings come from?

第一，問題，這些感覺是從哪裡來的？

Negative feelings about physical appearance

對身體外觀的負面感受

can come from a multitude of places.

可以來自許多地方。

It can be something you are genuinely insecure about,

這可能是你真正沒有安全感的事情。

something your ex told you they prefer or don't prefer,

你的前任告訴你他們喜歡或不喜歡的東西。

or maybe someone made fun of you for that thing.

或者也許有人因為那件事取笑你。

Identifying if this is something you feel

識別這是否是你的感覺

or something you were told

或者有人告訴你的事情

can help to determine your true feelings.

可以幫助確定你的真實感受。

If you were always told that brown eyes were ugly,

如果有人總是告訴你，棕色的眼睛是醜陋的。

it would make sense that you don't like your own brown eyes.

你不喜歡自己的棕色眼睛也是有道理的。

But what if someday someone takes a picture of you

但如果有一天，有人給你拍了一張照片呢？

in amazing light that makes your eyes sparkle?

在驚人的光線下，讓你的眼睛閃閃發光？

You might see the true beauty.

你可能會看到真正的美麗。

Think about any insecurities you may have,

想一想你可能有的任何不安全感。

then ask yourself, why do I feel this way?

然後問自己，為什麼我會有這樣的感覺？

This can be the first step to turning your outlook around.

這可能是扭轉你的前景的第一步。

Number two, what do I do with these feelings?

第二，我應該如何處理這些感覺？

Identifying the issue is the first step.

識別問題是第一步。

Once you've figured out

一旦你搞清楚了

where your negative feelings come from,

你的負面情緒從何而來。

you can figure out what to do with them.

你可以想出如何處理它們的辦法。

You can write everything down in detail

你可以詳細地寫下一切

to work through these feelings

來解決這些感受

with a trusted mental health professional.

與一個值得信賴的心理健康專家合作。

As you go through your thoughts,

當你經歷了你的想法。

take note of which things are facts and which are opinions.

注意哪些事情是事實，哪些是觀點。

An example would be, I have red hair,

一個例子是，我有一頭紅髮。

versus, the color of my hair is gross.

與此相反，我頭髮的顏色很噁心。

Once you've found the things that are opinions,

一旦你發現有意見的事情。

decide if you agree with them.

決定你是否同意他們的觀點。

You can also talk to a loved one

你也可以和你的夫妻談談

who you can be completely open and honest with.

你可以完全開誠佈公的人。

Dissecting these thoughts and feelings

剖析這些想法和感受

will help you identify what you believe about yourself.

將幫助你確定你對自己的看法。

Coming up with small actions

想出小行動

can help you be in control of how you see yourself

可以幫助你控制你如何看待自己

and help change how others see you.

並幫助改變他人對你的看法。

Number three, why you should care.

第三，為什麼你應該關心。

When you feel icky about yourself,

當你對自己感到噁心的時候。

you portray that to others.

你向別人描繪了這一點。

Because of the negative vibes,

因為有負面情緒。

people may not wanna spend too much time with you.

人們可能不想花太多時間在你身上。

When you're confident and have a positive self-image,

當你自信並有一個積極的自我形象。

that radiates from you, too,

這也是從你身上散發出來的。

and that increases the odds of them being attracted to you.

這就增加了他們被你吸引的機率。

And not all physical attractiveness

而不是所有的身體吸引力

is based on what you see.

是基於你看到的東西。

(laughs) Mind blown.

(笑)心花怒放。

In 2015, a group of researchers

2015年，一組研究人員

found that physical attraction isn't just what you see,

發現身體的吸引力不僅僅是你看到的。

but also what you pick up with your other senses,

但也包括你用你的其他感官收集到的東西。

things like the sound of your voice, your smell,

像你的聲音，你的氣味。

the way the person feels when you touch them,

當你觸摸對方時，對方的感覺。

and you being confident.

和你的自信。

These are just as important in determining

這些在決定以下方面同樣重要

if someone is physically attracted to you.

如果有人對你有生理上的吸引力。

Added bonus, relationships are like dominoes.

補充說明，關係就像多米諾骨牌。

If one gets knocked over, the rest usually go with it.

如果有一個被撞倒了，其餘的通常也會跟著倒下。

When your self-image and confidence go down,

當你的自我形象和信心下降時。

so does your mental health, quality of relationships,

你的心理健康、人際關係的品質也是如此。

issues with work or school, et cetera.

與工作或學校有關的問題，等等。

When you build that confidence back up

當你重新建立起這種信心

by changing your perception,

通過改變你的認知。

it makes to improve those other areas of your life.

它使你的生活的其他領域得到改善。

Number four, long story short,

第四，長話短說。

you are beautiful inside and out.

你從裡到外都很美。

If you weren't, you wouldn't care how others see you,

如果你不是這樣，你就不會關心別人如何看待你。

and you wouldn't be watching this.

而你就不會看這個。

You're not too ugly for a relationship.

你並不是太醜，不適合談戀愛。

Make some time to sit with yourself, a loved one,

騰出一些時間與自己、親人坐在一起。

or a trusted mental health professional

或一個值得信賴的心理健康專家

to explore these thoughts and feelings

來探討這些想法和感受

and where they come from, create an action plan,

以及它們的來源，創建一個行動計劃。

and work towards a more confident you.

並努力使自己變得更加自信。

It's so important that we're comfortable

讓我們感到舒適是如此重要

and confident in ourselves

並對自己有信心

in order to live a healthy, positive life,

以便過上健康、積極的生活。

not for the sole purpose of finding a relationship.

不是為了尋找關係的唯一目的。

Once you love yourself,

一旦你愛自己

the relationship will fall into place.

關係將落到實處。

If you found comfort in this video

如果你在這個視頻中找到安慰

or you have something you like to do

或者你有你喜歡做的事情

when you're not feeling your best,

當你感覺不是最好的時候。

share it with us in the comments below.

在下面的評論中與我們分享。

And please share this video

並請分享這段視頻

with others you think it might help.

與其他你認為可能有幫助的人分享。

The references and studies used

所用的參考資料和研究

are listed in the description below.

在下面的描述中列出。

Thanks for watching, friends.

謝謝你的觀看，朋友們。

Have a beautiful day, and see you next time.

祝你有個美好的一天，下次再見。

Need more info to see if it's your insecurities

需要更多的資訊來看看是否是你的不安全感

turning people off?

把人拒之門外？

Watch "9 Signs of Insecurity That Turn Others Off."

觀看 "令他人反感的9種不安全跡象"。