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Since my ex-wife Auntie Helen left
Uncle Roger always trying to find love
Don't get me wrong, rice cooker is good
But Uncle Roger need something less intimate
Today we gonna watch this show Love Island
And see if Uncle Roger can pick up tip for dating
One of you must suck the toes of the other for 30 seconds
Haiya
No no no no toe sucking on TV
Please don't do it, please
This week shows sponsored by Skillshare
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Uncle Roger very bad at taking photos
See? Terrible, terrible! That's why I take this course
Portrait photography
Shoot an epic instagram-worthy shot with Jessica kobeissi
So many of my friend has expensive camera
But their photo still look like shit, haiya
Expensive camera won't make your photo good
But this course will
You can take something that some people don't see as being pretty
and really make it into something cool
Fuiyoh, that look so cool!
See, she can even make white wall interesting
So put away your selfie stick
And take this course now
The first 1,000 niece and nephew to click the link in the description
Will get a one-month free trial of skillshare
So you can start exploring your creativity today
Go click link and now we start video
The sun is shining
This island look so nice
the villa's had a complete makeover
This villa looks nice also
The kitchen's still there
This kitchen looks so useless
See? Induction stove. Cooking on here so not satisfying
Use you some real fire!
How can you impress women If you don't use real fire
All the people will spend whole summer here
And the winning couple take-home 50,000 pounds
fuiyoh So much money
This is about time we say hello to the class of 2021
Hands up who wants to be on the telly!
What
What they wearing
Why you just
Why you just wear that, stop
Stop, you wear too little
Stop go back to Jeep and take a T-shirt
Haiya you showing too much
You're trying to find boyfriend
Not customer
This video just starting and it's so dirty already
3,2
Come on this can't be that difficult
We need a man!
You don't need man, you need common sense
Champagne bottle also cannot open
These people must not have anything worth celebrating in their life before
I'm Liberty, I'm 21 I'm a waitress and a marketing student from Birmingham
I could never be vegetarian, I love meat
A nice big sausage
Oh, Uncle Roger like nice big sausage also
I see this niece Liberty has good taste
She like Lap Cheong
Been too many cantonese restaurant before
Okay, not bad
Not many people know this
but I got nine As and an A* at school.
Haiya nine As and an A*
Why not all A Star? In Asian family, you a failure
I'm Kaz, I'm 26, I'm a fashion blogger from Essex
I love sex!
What she say
What she say
I love sex!
No no no
Don't say that kind of thing on TV, haiya
This show so dirty
When I see guys that I really like, I just kinda give them the eyes
The I? What the I stand for
Infection
What's she doing
Haiya, wear your seatbelt
You gonna get stopped by police
If you ride like this
This girl don't know how car work
What what
What she wearing, what is this?
Did a dog chew up half of your swimsuit? Haiya
This kind of thing making all my nephew third leg standing up
Sorry children
I'm Devon. Where are you girls from?
I'm from Oxford
Oh are you? I'm like right down the other end
It's good
Yeah.It's by a beach, so you know...
No fit men, though. Shame.
I'm Faye, I'm 25 years old
This woman
Why her lip look like this?
Look like two strips of bacon
Earlier, niece Liberty say
I love meat, A nice big sausage
Niece Liberty, don't need to get sausage from store
Just eat niece faye's lip
Yes, I'm a good girlfriend.
I'm buying you presents, I'm cooking you dinner
Actually, no, I don't do that
I don't actually know what I do, I don't know what I bring to the table!
I'm great in bed!
Being great in bed is not bad
But what about the other 23 hours and 58 minutes of the day?
You need to be about 6ft or over
Bring me a bit of comedy and someone that can control this
Control what?
Those boobs look so fake they not going anywhere
Can't believe I'm here, This is crazy!
Hey, I'm Kaz
I'm Shannon
Nice to meet you, babe
Lovely to meet you
Sharon, nice to meet you.
I'm Shannon
Oh, God, you're Sharon?
I'm Shannon, Sharon.
They both common names, no need to act so surprised
I wanna know, so what's your type?
I like quite an old soul
Old soul? okay Uncle Roger stand a chance with this woman
Uncle Roger soul so old
The only social media I'm on is ouija board
Niece Shannon, hit me up
I'll tell you what more
Whitmore
I like her, she dress the most classy
Welcome to love island
Ah, she the host
Excited?
Oh yeah
She my favorite celebrity so far
You all look absolutely incredible
But how are you feeling
Look at this, look at this!
Niece Faye boob looks so fake she make the grass look real
I think now they gonna introduce the men
Bring on the men!
I'm Jake, I'm 24 years old
I'm a water engineer
What is water engineer?
Water don't need engineering
Water you just drink
I think he just means he is a plumber
I love my job
Nowadays, you don't see a hairy chest
His shirt too tight, haiya, don't wear shirt from primary school
If you can't afford new shirt, how can you afford a woman
I've been single for about 15 months
His jeans so tight also
It look like leggings
Don't shrink wrap your balls haiya
Ball Is like wine
They need to breath
My type, all I ask for is
blonde, blue eyes, little feet
I like sucking toes
He what?
I like sucking toes!
Don't say that to people in public
Now the whole world know you like to suck toe
This is what happened when your culture don't have bubble tea
Then you need to find something else to suck on
If you want unchewable disgusting thing in your mouth
why not try Jamie Oliver boiled pork belly
I just want to find a nice little blonde, petite
Don't wink, and what with the tongue
Haiya so gross
Now every guy gonna chose to pair up with a woman
And if the woman interested she can step forward also
Please step forward
Oh, niece Liberty like him
Liberty why have you stepped forward for Jake?
I think he's quite cheeky, which I quite like
But look at this guy
His skin more orange than Uncle Roger Polo
Is he radioactive?
Did he just shower in Chernobyl
Hey, girls, you all right?
I'm Aaron, I'm 24, I'm from London and I work in high-end events.
My flirting never fails
It's always eye contact
Strong eye contact and a smile
Why that winking so many guy winking now
Is this what dating in 2021 is?
Is this what I need to do to become daddy Roger
When Uncle Roger dating nobody wink like this
we just think you have lazy eye
I think I'm a good boyfriend
Obviously, you know, you'd have to ask my exes
Correct
You'd have to ask my exes
Nephew Aaron Uncle Roger feel the same
I feel I'm good husband, Just don't ask auntie helen
Actually, don't ask Auntie Helen anything
Unless question is Why you such a cheating bitch
My name's Hugo, I'm 24, and I'm a PE teacher from Hampshire
Haiya PE teacher
That mean he not good enough to be actual teacher
He just teaching gym
Hugo
Yes
Who would you like to couple up with?
I'd like to couple up with..
I don't like this
Why it always the guy choosing the woman
Why not the other way around? It feel a bit backward
This less like dating, more like auction
Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 22
I'm from Essex and I'm a semi-pro footballer
Semi-Pro footballer
Just like how Jamie Oliver Semi-Pro chef
Never been in a relationship
Girls, face to face? Stop it!
Eww, again with the winking
This guy need to shave his beard also
That look like pubic hair
Okay now they all couple up now
Sharon and Hugo
Kaz and Toby
Faye and Brad
And Shannon and Aaron
Oh, hi, everyone. Are you OK?
Hi, darling, how are you?
Haiya There are black people
There are white people, there even a Puerto Rican
But why no Asian?
Why no Asian?
Get one Asian guy on there we need love also
They should have one Asian guy, he get on with black girl
Because last time uncle roger saw Asian and black people together
It was Rush Hour
That Uncle Roger favorite film
For Kaz and Toby and Sharon and Hugo
This is where they gonna live?
Of a man who's never seen a bed
Haiya they are going to expensive villa
And they still have to have roommate haiya
10 people sleeping in one room?
It's less like love Island more like love refugee camp
So nice
This is so nice
What do you do?
Fashion blogger
So what do you have to do?
"Hey, this is my YouTube channel."
Haiya, doing youtube is not that easy
This Puerto Rican guy insulting Uncle Roger job
Skip him
Time for the first night time montage of the series!
They are so excited about a bathroom
Why they all have same luggage?
How they gonna know whose is whose at airport?
Haiya so impractical
What
What she doing? what she doing?
Why? She's using mirror and then phone camera on her head
She live streaming her forehead?
Who do that?
This literally what she doing
I suppose the good thing with the early days is everyone can just crack on with
with who they want
straightaway you are like especially your outfit,
I was like, "Jesus Christ, like, blue and with a tan
Haiya these conversation so boring
Personality, for me, it's always personality
You're never gonna find out someone's personality if you're not attracted to them in the first place
Because usually I'm not going to give him the time of day
You're not though, are you?
Uncle Roger falling asleep
and then he talks himself in a circle
And then I come out the conversation a lot more confused than what I went into the conversation
Same niece faye, same
End up hitting it off mint
But you start finding other things,
Why her face like this all the time
She look like she don't know how blinking work
Niece Faye
Blink sometime, blinking is free
Oh, she actually blinks
So How are you feeling
I'm feeling good
What's your usual type? You haven't said.
I'm like
You didn't step forward for anyone.
I'm not funny, but, like,
I don't really know, like,
That's not me
I'm struggling with Aaron
I think he's amazing
Not just you, niece Shannon, Uncle Roger struggling also
Is that a bad thing?
If you're quiet, that's boring
No but I think it I'll just like take my time
This nephew Aaron is driest person uncle roger ever know
He has more teeth than personality
Okay
Now they gonna do few challenge
I'm not doing that!
I'm not doing that!
One of you must suck the toes of the other for 30 seconds.
Haiya no no no no toe sucking on tv
You need to apologize to children please don't do it
Please don't do it, please
Please don't, No
No no no
Don't! Stop!
Haiya
What dating show is this?
This not dating show, this more like weird fetish thing
Uncle Roger so upset
I put my leg down from chair
Niece Kaz you should put your leg down from chair also
don't let the Puerto Rican suck your toe
That nephew Jake with the foot fetish
I like sucking toes
He recording the video, what you gonna do with it?
He saving it for later haiya
That's my first time sucking toe as well, if anyone took note
What did it taste like?
Toes
So far this show nothing happening
Just bad conversation and toe sucking
What they gonna do to stir up drama
You and your partner must try to stop your jaws dropping to the floor
When you see who's heading into the villa!
New contender?
Hi, I'm Chloe, I'm 25 and I'm a marketing specialist from Oxfordshire
Most men are married or have girlfriends that means they're off limits
But they are not really off limits
I mean I'm partial to a married man
She partial to married man?
Uncle Roger and Matt Hancock both stand a chance
I'm a bit mushy, I do tend to absolutely fall in love
I just want someone fit and funny, that's not too much to ask for is it
This woman look like a hot scarecrow
Hey boy
How are you
Chloe here
I'd like to take you all on a date
but I'll let you guys decide who wants to come and join me
Hopefully I'll see you soon
When Uncle Roger dating it's so innocent
Just go get dinner, watch movie, holding hand
This is not a good dating instructional video for middle-aged Asian men like me
Haiya Uncle Roger not gonna do that weird winking tongue shit
And then suck your toe
Rice cooker is good
But Uncle Roger need something less intimate
Rice cooker is good
But Uncle Roger trying to have affair with real woman also
The I
What the I stand for
Infection
This is a really good line
The line was writted by Morgan Rees, a comedian friend of mine
He help me on my uncle roger video, so if you like the videos he's played a big part in it
Go check out his Instagram link down below
And go give him a follow
Control what?
Those boobs look so fake they not going anywhere
Uncle Roger's soul so old
The only social media I'm on is ouija board
This such a stupid joke
10 people sleeping in a room
It's less like love Island more like love refugee camp
So bad
Niece faye, blink sometime
Feel free to blink
Blinking is free, just blink