Parents who neglect their children or those  who are overly involved, achieve the opposite.

Their children often learn helplessness  — and hence believe that they can neither  

control their life, nor change their environment.

Learned helplessness was first discovered by  

two researchers who conditioned  dogs to endure electric shocks.

Martin Seligman and Steven F. Maier conducted  their experiment with three groups of dogs.

Dogs from the first group were caged and  made to wait for a period of time before  

being released. These dogs were  what's known as the control group.

The second group were also caged and got electric  shocks from below. When they pressed a button,  

the shocks stopped. They learned  that they could stop the pain.

The third group of dogs were exposed to the  shocks, but had no way of stopping them.

After the conditioning, all three groups were  

put into a box that gave shocks  on one side, but not the other.

The first and second group of  dogs quickly learned to avoid  

being shocked by jumping over the wall  that separated the two sides of the box.

The third group of dogs made no attempt  to avoid the shocks -they had developed  

a cognitive expectation that they  could not avoid the pain. Seligman  

and Maier attributed this to learned helplessness.

Children can also be affected, as  this oversimplified story attests.

This is the story of Joe. While  other kids were allowed to run,  

this cute little boy was put in a  walker so he couldn't hurt himself.

And so, from early on, Joe learned  that the world is a dangerous place.

On the rare occasions that his father was home, he  told Joe to toughen up, and become a strong boy.

But without a role model, Joe  lacked the motivation to live  

up to his dad's expectations.  He began to feel inferior.

Over time this feeling got stronger.

Whenever there was a problem his  mother would jump in to help.

Joe began to internalize the belief that he  

couldn't help himself when  confronted with challenges.

Whenever he had to make a major  decision, he'd ask his mom for advice.

Deep inside he resented her for not  allowing him to become more independent.

What are your thoughts? How can we help  those that fail to see the path out of  

their toxic life? How can we help them  to help themselves? Share your thoughts  

and your own experience with learned  helplessness in the comments below!

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