Welcome to Sandwich Star, where the subs aren't the only thing that's a foot long.

Boy, I heard you guys lie about the LENGTH of your subs.

What?

As if!

My sub is huge!

Yeah, I'ma need some proof.

Want me to measure it?

See?

It's monster-sized!

Don't they got rulers for where you from?

You must REALLY want the full 12 inches.

Like, I know this be Subway, but I didn't expect you to be… the sub.

Sub!

As if!

I'ma top on top of this game!

You see this fit?

Am I REALLY supposed to be impressed by fake Timbs and last year's Gucci?

You keep this up, I'ma have to turn this Subway into an express train to a knuckle sandwich.

You wanna throw down?

You need to throw down some cash on a new outfit.

Boy, my fit fresher than your food!

Bruh, you're getting dominated up there.

I don't need your input!

Bruh, he's up there irradiating pure testosterone, bruh.

Like, I heard they pushovers at Quiznos.

You could probably handle that, bruh.

Yeah, more like quiz-no!

I'm getting my $5 footlong!

Bruh, you know the $5 footlong, $8 and 11 inches, right?

Boy, how is the $5 footlong not $5 and not a footlong?

Like, legally?

That's just what we call it.

And, come on, everyone adds an inch or two.

Boy, you got some predatory business practices!

We're actually 100% predator-free!

Now!

Just get me my Sub!

Sure!

What kind of bread you want?

What do you mean, what kind?

They make new bread or something?

Bruh, they really made a sequel to Bread?

Yeah, we got We-O Italian.

Boy, do I look Italian?

Maybe.

Uh, well, uh, is this gluten-free?

Nothing here is free!

You got money?

I got bread!

Then why you want mine?

Boy, just pick a Sub!

Okay, I pick you!

What?

You're the Sub!

Prepare to get subbed!

Finally, some customer service!

Wait, you actually want girly boys to dominate you?

Why do you think I come to Su- It was a joke, bro!