I make all this stuff work through him.

I work real good.

My title is I am the head of receiving.

Receive what?

I don't know.

You know, I do what I can.

Nobody ever speaks to me.

I don't even think they know I speak English.

They can't get by without me.

Who wasn't talking to you?

I'm the head of IT.

They just brought in some new girl and she's a slacker.

She doesn't even do half of the stuff she's supposed to do and, you know, am I supposed to look at you or the camera?

I'm new at this.

I don't know if, uh ...

Well, she works in the office with me and I actually sit right behind her.

So, uh, sometimes I just watch what she's writing and copy what she's writing and write it down on my own post-it notes because I don't have anything better to do.

You know what?

She is.

She's that one that sits on the other side of my plant.

How about the sweater crow?

Part scare crow, part sweater, all blonde, her.

Can't remember her real name.

But she uses a lot of, uh, company time doing inappropriate things on the internet.

Somebody did get fired for internet usage before.

Like, I think the person before her, like, got fired because they were online all the time.

What's up with her?

Why did she get in trouble for doing it?

Because she sits next to the boss's son and he likes her.

Oh, that's right.

Cat videos.

Lots of cat videos.

Every once in a while puppies to mix it up.

Wild girl over there.

Cat videos.

I run the place.

I can choose to make her or break her, which I may or may not have left my phone number on her desk.

I'm always in the mail room.

I've got to do something else.

So I ride the elevator.

Confiscated this from her.

Third time this week.

Paperclip chains.

This is a particular irritant because people have to use these.

Having to unclog every one of them takes up company time.

This does not take an IT degree.

You can't even play cat's cradle with this stuff if you cut yourself.

So, like, we've kind of heard her talking about, like, this guy, but, I don't know, he never calls.

The guy that she talks about all the time, who we don't know who he is.

I mean, so.

We've never seen him, so, I don't know.

I don't think he exists, actually.

The boyfriend.

I hear she has a boyfriend, but, I mean, I'm used to that.

So, girls I go after usually already have boyfriends, generally.

Have they been pictured together?

It's hard to say.

She's got a boyfriend?

That's what I hear.

Who?

Somebody here?

Jinja?

Nobody's ever seen him.

They call me Jinja, too, and I take karate.

I don't know.

I haven't ever seen her with anybody.

She always seems like a loner to me.

I don't really know.

I'm the Jinja Ninja.

Surprise, a little office trivia there.

Not a lot of people know it, but it's on the bulletin board.

I give lessons.

They said he looked kind of sketchy.

It could be, like, drugs or something.

I don't know.

Drugs?

You know, I'm not spitballing or anything like that, but I heard he's been cheating on her a little bit.

What I heard, and this is just hearsay, but I heard that he's in jail right now.

His gang brothers betrayed him or something like that.

I don't know.

I could be in a gang.

I thought about it a few times, but, you know, just not right now.

I think he's a figment.

I think he's a figment.

We don't use that word.

We need to find out.

Yeah.

We need to investigate.

Yeah.

You know, maybe on our break we can do that.

This is our break.

Oh.

Can we go?

Well, most people don't know this, but he's in the service, serving in Afghanistan.

Yeah.

Uh-huh.

She thinks about him all the time.

And no, I don't know kung fu.