We're in love.

Do not talk to him unless you want to feel whiter than you already are.

Oh, and that stain?

Not clam chowder.

Go marry the ketchups.

Marry the ketchups.

I'm on it. Okay, now divorce the ketchups.

Stop, stop, stop.

There's no such thing as divorcing the ketchups.

You've never waitressed a day in your life.

Yes, I have. You expect me to believe you after watching that whole Temple Grandin routine?

I'm telling Lee. Okay, okay, I may have enhanced my resume.

Enhanced?

What are we, in Paris?

Please, I really need this job, okay?

We lost all of our money.

My trust fund was taken for legal fees.

My dad is in jail. What are you, Martin Channing's daughter?

Where's the paper?

Martin Channing?

The guy who ripped off the entire city is your father?

He told us we were having a good year. You're Caroline Channing.

You're like a billionaire.

Was.

Was a billionaire.

They froze all our assets.

Everything's gone.

I only have what I could grab, and I grabbed all the wrong things. So, do you know the president?

I've met him.

He's hot.

He's the president.

Have you been to Switzerland?

Yes.

Do you have a horse?

Yes.

Do you know Paris Hilton?

No, she's a hundred. Excuse me, two hot chocolates, please.

Coming up.

Let me do that, please.

I'm a really fast learner.

I went to Wharton Business School.

I got 2,300 on my SATs.

Can you make a hot chocolate or not?

Oh!

Nailed it. We split the tips.

Give me yours.

Did better than I thought you would.

Listen, tonight I thought of a way we could make some extra money.

They've totally underestimated the price point on those red velvet cupcakes.

In Manhattan, the asking price is at least seven. So, we could sell them for seven and then pocket the difference.

Nothing about that sounds wrong to you?

It's not our fault that the idiot who makes the cupcakes doesn't know their worth.

I'm the idiot who makes the cupcakes.

New information. Look, that's stupid.

No one would pay seven dollars for one of my cupcakes.

Really?

Because...

Well, at least we know you're not adopted.