This is all for you, my darling.

And also because...

Hello!

Oh, well, I guess I'll just have to wait for the 70s to come back into fashion.

Oh!

How long have you been standing there?

Long enough for curiosity to turn into regret.

Right! Any plans for the weekend?

Well, I was gonna go on a date with Penny, but maybe I'll just stay home and bleach my eyeballs.

Well, clear your diaries, gentlemen!

It's your turn to look after the school hamster, Chris Morris.

Oh, come on! This hamster's so old it should be classified as a mineral!

I don't wanna be the kid responsible for him when he turns into dust!

Well, I'm afraid it wasn't a request. It's an order.

He's been in this cage since he was born, six long years ago.

So please take extremely good...

Extremely good care of him.

Principal Brown, there's no way...

Just a moment.

It's four o'clock. I'm not a principal anymore. I don't care.

Romance! Now!

I think we've heard enough.

CHRIS MORRIS

My date with Penny!

Yeah!

Actually...

What are you doing?

I'm doing my hair for the date.

Oh, cool! What should I wear?

What do you mean?

For the date!

Dude, you're not coming to my date!

You'd be a third wheel!

Yeah, on your tricycle!

No way, man!

But I got nothing to do!

Well, you can look after Chris Morris.

What? No! I got stuff to do!

You just said you had nothing to do!

Fine! I'll look after him then!

But it's your fault if this drain-hair burrito uses his last breath to ruin my date!

Oh, he's so cute!

I think it's so cool that you're looking after him.

You do?

Well, you see, the thing you've got to learn about me, Penny, is that I'm a stand-up guy.

The kind of guy who takes care of school pets without being asked.

The kind of guy who welcomes responsibility.

The kind of guy you'd want to marry.

But, you don't believe me?

Then check out these dad skills.

There, there. I've got you, little fella.

I will always be there for you.

Ooh! He's so paternal!

Here, my son! I have provided!

Eat!

Dude!

Okay, all right, I believe you!

Maybe you are marriage material.

Well, please send your resume to my secretary.

Oh!

P-P-Penny!

P-P-P-Penny!

P-P-P-P-Penny!

Oh, no! You can't come!

Oh my gosh, dude!

You have to hang out with Chris Morris! He's the best!

I just had the most awesome date with Penny, and he was the perfect wingman!

I'm gonna ask Principal Brown if we can take care of him next weekend, and the weekend after, and the weekend after that, and the weekend...

I'm trying to give you the silent treatment, but it doesn't work if you don't notice!

Just try him!

Try Chris Morris.

Things have changed.

It used to just be me and him versus the world, but now all he cares about is...

Penny!

I mean, of course I want him to be happy.

I just wish I could be part of it.

Am I being too possessive?

I am being too possessive.

Do you mind if I lie down?

I think this all started a long time ago, back when I was still just a kid.

I don't know why I'm so worried!

It doesn't matter anyway!

I just don't want to be left alone, you see?

It's the silence.

The terrible silence.

You don't get to judge me, Chris Morris!

You're not one of my dad!

Oh, hey, Darwin.

Oh, hi!

You know what, Chris Morris?

I think I just realized that all this is coming from my fear of abandonment.

I'm projecting my anxieties onto my brother and forgetting to actually live my own life.

Dude, thank you.