Lady, give me tonight Here's what you'd do if you caught your wife cheating on you When most men get caught in this situation they'd freak out and confront their wives But you're here to play chess, not checkers Since you know that your wife is a cheater you're going to go to your local high school find the captain of the football team and give him $100 to follow your wife on Instagram Your wife will see this follow request and be intrigued and this young man will start to flirt with her in the DMs A couple of weeks pass and eventually they decide to meet up in person to grab a cup of coffee So your wife leaves the house She tells you that she's going to go to her yoga class But really, she's driving to the coffee shop to meet up with this jock When she arrives there, she'll find you and two of your friends who are holding cameras And you'll run up to your wife, screaming This woman is trying to meet a 17-year-old boy She'll freak out and tell you that they're just friends and that nothing really happened But you'll just serve her the divorce papers and threaten to release this footage and her chat logs with this 17-year-old If she doesn't let you keep 100% of your assets and pay you $50,000 in a month Here is the fastest way to get $1,000,000 Follow this plan if you want to get rich First, go to the busiest restaurant in your city Walk in without a reservation and ask for a table The host will likely say I'm sorry, there's a 30-minute wait I can take your name You reply I see some tables right there Why can't I sit there?

They will say those tables are reserved Look upset After about 30 minutes of waiting and making the staff uncomfortable you will be seated When your server comes she will start to explain the specials Interrupt her after a few words and say Yeah, yeah, yeah I don't care Let me order The server will feel uncomfortable Order only two appetizers When your food arrives take out a DNA sampling kit from your pocket Because you were rude the staff might have spit in your food so you will test it for any traces If no one spit in your food spit in it yourself and say it was someone else At the end, sue everything out of the restaurant until you get rich and repeat it to make even more money Here's what to do if you catch your kids sneaking out at night The first thing you need to do is to not mention it Let them think you don't know Then, book a hotel room outside of town On a random day go about your usual routine but don't come home Your kids will start to worry and call you Ignore their calls and texts Your spouse will also act worried and pretend to search for you around 11pm but they'll actually join you at the hotel Leave your kids alone for two days while you think of a story to explain your absence After two days come back home and tell your kids a made-up story like you were stuck at work or in a hospital Act relieved to be back Then, look up home security systems and have a salesman come to your house Pretend you didn't call them and let them sell you a security system with cameras at every entrance Tell your kids you never want this to happen again and ask if you can all install Life360 Your worried kids will agree and now you'll have their location 24-7 and know who comes in and out of your house DJ Kara is back with another question for you What's the similarity between a woman and a tornado?

At first, there's a lot of blowing but in the end, you lose your house Here is your daily dose of jokes Little Timmy was sitting in class and he was behind a girl called Susan The teacher asks the class who created the Earth and Little Timmy pokes Susan in the back with his sharpened pencil and she jumps and says, My God!

And the teacher says, Yes, Susan, God did create the Earth Susan sits down Then the teacher asks, Where do you go after you live a good life?

And Little Timmy pokes Susan again and she jumps up and says, Heavens to Betsy!

And the teacher says, Yes, Susan, you will go, go to heaven after you live a good life Susan sits down, knowing full well that Little Timmy was poking her Susan gave Little Timmy an angry glare and she turned around And then the teacher asks the class, What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?

And Little Timmy pokes Susan harder this time in the back and she jumps, turns around and says, If you stick that thing in me one more time I swear I'm going to lose it Here is your daily dose of jokes One day in school at the end of class the teacher tells the students to go home and come back with a story that has a moral The next day, Susie goes first and says, My dad sells eggs One day, the eggs fell out of the basket The moral is, Don't put all your eggs in one basket Then, Lucy says, My dad has an incubator Last week, only 8 of 12 eggs hatched The moral is, Don't count your chickens before they hatch Finally, Kenny says, My Uncle Ted fought in Vietnam His plane crashed but he took a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete He drank the beer, shot 70 soldiers, cut 20 more and killed the rest with his hands The teacher, shocked, asks, And what is the morale of your story?

Kenny replies, Well, don't mess with Uncle Ted when he's been drinking For more UN videos visit www.un.org