What?

什麼？

Cute naked guy's really starting to put on weight.

可愛的裸男真的開始發胖了。

Eww, eww, eww, eww, eww, eww, eww, eww.

哎呦，哎呦，哎呦，哎呦，哎呦，哎呦，哎呦。

What?

什麼？

Ugly naked guy got a thigh master.

醜陋的裸男有了一個大腿高手。

Eww.

噁心

Me, I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor, but Bob is...

我一個月參加三次試鏡，自稱演員，但鮑勃...

Oh, God help us.

上帝保佑我們

What?

什麼？

Ugly naked guy's laying kitchen tile.

醜陋的裸男正在廚房鋪瓷磚。

Eww.

噁心

Eww, look.

噢，看

Ugly naked guy lit a bunch of candles.

醜陋的裸男點燃了一堆蠟燭。

That had to hurt.

那一定很疼。

Oh, my God.

我的天啊

Oh, my God.

我的天啊

Guys, you gotta come see this.

夥計們，你們一定要來看看

There's some creep out there with a telescope.

外面有個拿著望遠鏡的怪人。

I can't believe it.

我簡直不敢相信。

He's looking right at us.

他正看著我們。

Oh, that is so sick.

哦，太噁心了

I feel violated and not in a good way.

我覺得自己受到了侵犯，而且不是好的方面。

How could people do that?

人們怎麼能這樣做呢？

Oh, you guys, look.

你們看

Ugly naked guy got gravity boots.

醜陋的裸男穿上了重力靴

Eww.

噁心

What?

什麼？

Ugly naked guy's taking his turkey out of the oven.

醜陋的裸男正在把火雞從烤箱裡拿出來。

Oh, my God.

我的天啊

He's not alone.

他並不孤單。

Ugly naked guy is having Thanksgiving dinner with ugly naked gal.

醜陋的裸男與醜陋的裸女共進感恩節晚餐。

You gotta see this.

你一定要看看這個。

All right, ugly naked guy.

好吧，醜陋的裸男。

Oh, ugly naked dancing.

哦，醜陋的裸體舞蹈。

It's nice that he has someone.

他有人照顧真好

Oh, my God.

我的天啊

There's an unattractive nude man playing the cello.

有一個不好看的裸體男人在拉大提琴。

Yeah, well, just be glad it's not playing a smaller instrument.

是啊，幸好它演奏的不是小型樂器。

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

哦，哦，哦，哦

Ugly naked guy is decorating his tree.

醜陋的裸男正在裝飾他的聖誕樹。

Oh, my God.

我的天啊

You should see the size of his Christmas balls.

你應該看看他的聖誕球有多大。

Woo-hoo.

嗚呼。

The curse is broken.

詛咒被打破了

I called everybody I know, and everyone is alive.

我給所有認識的人都打了電話，他們都還活著。

Huh.

咦？

What?

什麼？

Ugly naked guy looks awfully still.

醜陋的裸男看起來一動不動。

Oh.

哦。

Oh, my God.

我的天啊

I killed him.

我殺了他

I killed another one.

我又殺了一個

And this curse is getting stronger, too, to bring down something that big?

這個詛咒也越來越強，能讓那麼大的東西倒下嗎？

Well, maybe he's just taking a nap.

好吧，也許他只是在打盹。

I'm telling you.

我告訴你

He hasn't moved since this morning.

他從早上開始就沒動過。

We should call somebody.

我們應該打電話找人

And tell them what?

告訴他們什麼？

That the naked guy we stare at all the time isn't moving?

我們一直盯著的那個裸男不動了？

Well, we've gotta find out if he's alive.

我們得知道他是否還活著

Yeah, but how are we gonna do that?

是啊，但我們該怎麼做呢？

There's no way.

不可能

Well, there is one way.

有一個辦法

His window's open.

他的窗戶開著

I say... we poke him.

我說......我們戳他。

Hey.

嘿。

You know how we, uh, save all those chopsticks for no reason when we get Chinese food?

你知道我們在吃中餐的時候，會無緣無故地留那麼多筷子嗎？

Yeah.

是啊

Well, now we got a reason.

現在我們有理由了。

What?

什麼？

Well, we're fashioning a very long poking device.

我們正在製作一個很長的戳穿裝置。

All right.

好吧

Something this big and long is gonna be very difficult to maneuver.

這麼大這麼長的東西很難操控。

Fortunately, I have a lot of experience in that area.

幸運的是，我在這方面有著豐富的經驗。

Can we please focus here?

我們能把注意力集中在這裡嗎？

A naked man's life hangs in the balance.

一個赤身裸體的男人命懸一線。

I'm telling you, he's dead.

我告訴你，他已經死了。

What we're about to have here is a dead fat guy on a stick.

我們即將看到的是一個死在棍子上的胖子。

All right.

好吧

Ladies and gentlemen, let's poke.

女士們，先生們，我們開始吧。

Steady.

穩定。

Steady.

穩定。

Okay, a little higher.

好吧，再高一點。

Careful of the angle.

注意角度。

Okay, okay.

好吧 好吧

We're approaching the window.

我們正在靠近窗戶

Thread the needle.

穿針引線

Thread the needle.

穿針引線

He's alive!

他還活著

He's alive!

他還活著

And yet, we're still poking him.

然而，我們還是在戳他。

Okay, retract the device.

好了，收回裝置。

Retract the device.

收回設備。

He does not look happy.

他看起來並不高興。

Hey, hey!

嘿，嘿

Now he's showing us his poking device.

現在，他向我們展示了他的戳戳器。

Hey, that's never gonna make it all the way over here, buddy.

嘿，那是不可能傳到這裡來的，夥計。

Oh, hey, you guys.

你們好啊

Look, a naked guy's putting stuff in boxes.

看，一個光著膀子的傢伙正在往箱子裡裝東西。

I'd say from the looks of it, our naked buddy is moving.

看樣子，我們的 "裸男 "要搬家了。

Ironically, most of the boxes seem to be labeled clothes.

具有諷刺意味的是，大部分箱子似乎都貼著衣服的標籤。

Oh, I'm gonna miss that big old squishy butt.

哦，我會想念那個柔軟的大屁股的。

And we're done with the chicken fried rice.

雞肉炒飯也吃完了。

Hey.

嘿。

Hey, if he's moving, maybe I should try to get his place.

嘿，如果他要搬家，也許我該去搶他的位置。

Oh, good idea.

哦，好主意。

It would be so cool to live across from you guys.

如果能住在你們對面，那就太酷了。

Yeah, hey, then we could do that telephone thing.

那我們就可以打電話了

You know, where you have a can, we have a can.

你知道，你們有一個罐子，我們也有一個罐子。

And it's connected by a string.

它由一根繩子連接。

Or we could do the actual telephone thing.

我們也可以打電話。

Oh, my God, I love this apartment.

天啊，我愛死這間公寓了

Isn't it perfect?

是不是很完美？

I can't believe I never realized how great it is.

真不敢相信，我從未意識到它有多棒。

Well, that is because your eye immediately goes to the big naked man.

那是因為你的視線會立刻投向那個光著身子的大個子。

It's amazing.

太神奇了

You better hurry up and fill out an application, or I'm gonna beat you to it.

你最好快點填好申請表，不然我就不客氣了。

Oh.

哦。

Well, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm gonna go use ugly naked guy's bathroom.

好吧，我從沒想過我會這麼說，但我要去用醜陋裸男的浴室了。

Hey.

嘿。

Hey, Ross, any word on the apartment yet?

羅斯，公寓有消息了嗎？

Well, I called over there, and it turns out ugly naked guy is subletting it himself.

我打了電話過去，原來那個醜陋的裸男正在轉租。

And he's already had, like, a hundred applicants.

他已經收到了上百個申請。

Oh.

哦。

No, no, I've got the edge.

不，不，我有優勢。

I know it's not exactly ethical, but I sent him a little bribe to tip the scales in my direction.

我知道這不道德，但我還是給他送了點賄賂，讓他把天平向我這邊傾斜。

Yeah, check it out.

是的，去看看。

You can probably see it from the window.

你可能從窗戶就能看到。

Oh, is it that pinball machine with the big bow on it?

哦，是那個有大蝴蝶結的彈球機嗎？

No.

不

That new mountain bike?

那輛新的山地自行車？

No.

不

Well, what did you send?

你寄了什麼？

A basket of mini muffins.

一籃迷你鬆餅

There's a whole table of mini muffin baskets.

有一整桌的迷你鬆餅籃。

Which one did you send?

你寄了哪張？

The small one.

小的那個

What?

什麼？

You actually thought that basket was gonna get you the apartment?

你真以為那個籃子能讓你得到公寓？

Well, yeah.

是啊

Someone sent us a basket at work once, and people went crazy over those little muffins.

有一次，有人給我們公司送了一籃子，大家都為那些小松餅瘋狂。

It was the best day.

這是最棒的一天。

Your work makes me sad.

你的作品讓我感到悲傷。

Oh, man.

天啊

I want that place so much.

我太想去那個地方了

And I was so sure that was gonna work.

我還以為會成功呢

There's 12 bucks I'll never see again.

這 12 塊錢我再也見不到了。

Good evening, sir.

晚上好，先生

My name is Ross Geller.

我叫羅斯-蓋勒。

I'm one of the people who applied for the apartment, and I realize that the competition is fierce, but...

我是申請公寓的人之一，我知道競爭很激烈，但是...

I'm sorry.

對不起

I can't help but notice that you're naked.

我不禁注意到你赤身裸體。

What?

什麼？

I applaud you.

我為你鼓掌。

Man, I wish I was naked.

天啊，我真希望我沒穿衣服。

I mean, this looks so great.

我是說，這看起來太棒了。

That is how God intended it.

這就是上帝的旨意。

Hey, hey.

嘿，嘿

Check it out.

看看吧

Check it out.

看看吧

Ugly naked guy's got a naked friend.

醜陋的裸男有個裸體朋友

Oh, yeah.

哦，是的

Oh, my God!

我的天啊

That's our friend!

這就是我們的朋友！

It's Naked Ross!

是 "裸體羅斯"！

Hey.

嘿。

Hey, look.

嘿，你看

Ugly naked guy's back.

醜陋的裸男背影

I haven't seen him in so long.

我好久沒見到他了。

Oh, God.

哦，上帝啊

I really miss that fat bastard.

我真的很想念那個胖雜種。

Wow.

哇

This is so weird.

這太奇怪了。

I just realized this may be the last time we're all hanging out together.

我剛剛意識到，這可能是我們最後一次一起出去玩了。

It's almost as if he knew.

好像他早就知道似的。