Can I have your pay stubs?

能給我你的工資單嗎？

Sure.

當然。

I'm so sorry, you make too much to live here.

我很抱歉，你賺得太多了，不能住在這裡。

Maybe try the luxury apartments.

也許可以試試豪華公寓。

You might qualify over there.

你可能符合那邊的條件。

Hi, welcome to luxury apartments.

嗨，歡迎來到豪華公寓。

Can I see your pay stubs?

我能看看你的工資單嗎？

Before I give you that, really quick question, um, why are they considered luxury?

在回答這個問題之前，我想問一個非常簡單的問題：為什麼它們被認為是奢侈品？

They look like every other apartment complex in the area.

它們看起來就像該地區的其他公寓樓一樣。

Good question.

問得好。

Nothing but the name, actually.

事實上，除了名字，什麼都沒有。

We haven't updated anything in at least ten years, but with having the name luxury in the apartment complex name, we don't have to accept Section 8 or any type of government-funded assistance.

我們至少有十年沒有更新過任何東西了，但由於我們的公寓大樓名稱中包含了 "豪華 "二字，所以我們不必接受 "第 8 款 "或任何政府資助的援助。

Let me take a look at your pay stubs.

讓我看看你的工資單。

So sorry, you don't make three times the amount of any of the rent, even the minimal, so we're not gonna be able to help you.

所以很抱歉，你掙的錢連房租的三倍都不夠，哪怕是最低的房租，所以我們幫不了你。

Have you tried buying a house?

你買過房子嗎？

So the low-income housing just told me that I make too much.

所以，低收入住房部門就告訴我，我掙得太多了。

How can I not make enough here?

我怎麼能在這裡賺不到錢呢？

I don't understand that.

我不明白。

I really don't think that I am in a position in my life to buy a house at this moment, especially because you're telling me I can't rent, so how can I buy?

我真的不認為我現在有能力買房，尤其是你告訴我我不能租房，那我怎麼能買房呢？

I don't, like, I can't afford a $3,000 rent, but I can afford a $400,000 loan for a house.

我不會，比如，我付不起 3000 美元的房租，但我付得起 40 萬美元的購房貸款。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

The good thing is, that's not my problem.

好在這不是我的問題。

Here you go.

給你

Hi, welcome to buying a house.

嗨，歡迎您買房。

Do you have your pay stubs, your credit report, your firstborn, and the doppelganger?

你有工資單、信用報告、長子和二重身嗎？

The lighting is, it's very different in here from everywhere else I've been.

這裡的照明與我去過的其他地方截然不同。

Oh yeah, the lighting is very different.

對了，燈光也很不一樣。

We do that on purpose in hopes that the lighting is so dim that you can't really read all the contract papers that you're signing, but let me look through your stuff and see what we got going on.

我們故意這樣做，是希望燈光太暗，讓你看不清你要籤的所有合同文件，但還是讓我看看你的東西，看看我們有什麼好辦法。

Okay, so no, this is not gonna work.

好吧，不，這行不通。

You use your credit card to pay groceries, and yes, I know a lot of people are doing that because people can no longer afford groceries, but we cannot sell you a house.

你用信用卡支付食品雜費，是的，我知道很多人都這麼做，因為人們再也買不起食品雜費了，但我們不能賣給你房子。

I'm so sorry.

真對不起

So can you tell me more about the builder?

那麼，你能告訴我更多關於建築商的資訊嗎？

Like, are these, are these homes well built?

比如，這些房子建得好嗎？

So basically, the bones are great.

所以，基本上，這些骨頭都很好。

It's concrete block, which is fantastic, but it's gonna be super flat paint, so any scuff marks, they're just gonna, you're never gonna be able to clean them, if I'm being honest.

這是混凝土砌塊，非常棒，但油漆會非常平整，所以任何擦痕都會留下，如果我說實話，你永遠也擦不乾淨。

All of your doorknobs are gonna fall off within the first year, and you're probably going to have to replace some of the appliances, because even though it's a new house, we kind of got them in like a wholesale kind of thing with like not so reputable appliance.

你所有的門把手都會在第一年內脫落，你可能還得更換一些電器，因為雖然這是一棟新房子，但我們是以批發的方式買的，電器的信譽也不是很好。

Listen, you can't, you don't qualify anyway, so none of this matters, but, but I do have another option that I think might work for you.

聽著，你不能，反正你也不符合條件，所以這些都不重要，但是，但是我有另一個選擇，我覺得可能對你有用。

So there is a new bridge being built, and we are selling tents for under the bridge, if you're interested in that.

是以，有一座新橋正在修建，我們正在出售橋下的帳篷，如果你對此感興趣的話。

At this point, I guess, yes, I'll take an application for a tent.

此時此刻，我想，是的，我會接受帳篷申請。

I am happy to put you on that waitlist.

我很樂意把你列入候補名單。

There's a waitlist to live under a bridge.

要住在橋下還得排隊。

Are you kidding me right now?

你現在是在跟我開玩笑嗎？

Oh yeah, nobody can afford to buy a house right now, so it's called the Tent Palace, and we are monetizing the shit out of that.

哦，對了，現在沒人買得起房子，所以就叫 "帳篷宮"，我們要把它貨幣化。

Don't tell anyone I said that, um, but I can put you on the waiting list.

別告訴別人是我說的 但我可以把你列入候補名單