If self-love feels like the hardest thing to do and you don't even know where to start, well, in this video, we'll provide a step-by-step guide on how people typically learn to love themselves again and uncover which stage most people fall into the trap of getting stuck.

如果你覺得自愛是最難做到的事情，甚至不知道從哪裡開始，那麼，在本視頻中，我們將一步步指導你如何重新學會愛自己，並揭示大多數人在哪個階段會陷入困境。

Stage one, self-awareness.

第一階段，自我認識。

Self-love begins with self-awareness.

自愛始於自我意識。

It involves understanding your feelings and recognizing your patterns.

這包括瞭解自己的感受，認識自己的模式。

For instance, maybe you notice that you constantly put others first and end up feeling drained, or perhaps you catch yourself procrastinating on things that are actually good for you and realize it's tied to fear of failure or negative thoughts telling you that you're not good enough.

例如，也許你發現自己總是把別人放在第一位，最終感到身心疲憊；也許你發現自己在一些對自己有好處的事情上拖拖拉拉，並意識到這與害怕失敗或消極的想法有關，這些想法告訴你，你還不夠好。

Self-awareness is the stage where you learn to pause and ask yourself, what am I feeling?

在這個階段，你要學會停下來問自己：我的感受是什麼？

What do I need right now?

我現在需要什麼？

To help with understanding your emotions, you can start a reflection journal.

為了幫助瞭解自己的情緒，你可以寫一本反思日記。

At the end of each day, write down moments when you felt drained or unhappy and why.

每天結束時，寫下你感到疲憊或不開心的時刻以及原因。

Over time, you'll spot patterns that help you understand yourself better.

隨著時間的推移，你會發現一些有助於更好地瞭解自己的模式。

Always remember that awareness is the first step toward change.

始終牢記，認識是改變的第一步。

Self-acceptance.

自我接納。

Once you're aware of your patterns, the next step is accepting yourself.

一旦你意識到自己的模式，下一步就是接受自己。

This doesn't mean ignoring your flaws.

這並不意味著忽視自己的缺點。

It means embracing all of you, the good, the bad, and the messy without judgment.

這意味著擁抱你的全部，好的、壞的、混亂的，不加評判。

Self-acceptance says I may not be where I want to be yet, but I'm still worthy of love and respect.

自我接納說，我可能還沒有達到我想要的境界，但我仍然值得被愛和尊重。

Maybe you struggle with time management or getting things done.

也許你在時間管理或完成工作方面有困難。

Instead of calling yourself lazy, acknowledge it as a habit you can work on, not a reflection of your worth.

與其說自己懶惰，不如承認這是你可以努力養成的習慣，而不是你價值的體現。

Replace self-criticism with affirmations like I'm learning and growing every day.

用 "我每天都在學習和成長 "這樣的肯定來代替自我批評。

Self-compassion.

自我同情。

Self-compassion is about treating yourself with kindness, especially during tough times.

自我同情就是善待自己，尤其是在艱難時期。

Think about how you'd comfort a best friend on a hard day.

想想在艱難的日子裡，你會如何安慰最好的朋友。

You wouldn't criticize them, right?

你不會責備他們吧？

You'd offer support and understanding.

你會給予支持和理解。

According to Dr. Nachka Duke, a registered psychotherapist, self-love starts with this same approach.

註冊心理治療師納奇卡-杜克博士認為，自愛也是從這種方法開始的。

It's about showing up for yourself, understanding your emotional needs, and facing challenges with kindness instead of self-criticism or shame.

這就是要為自己著想，瞭解自己的情感需求，以善意而非自我批評或羞愧的態度面對挑戰。

For example, if something doesn't go as planned instead of saying I'm such a failure, try, this didn't work out, but I'm proud of myself for trying.

例如，如果某件事情沒有按計劃進行，與其說我是個失敗者，不如試著說，雖然沒有成功，但我為自己的嘗試感到驕傲。

I'll learn to do better next time.

下次我會學著做得更好。

When you notice negative self-talk, pause and ask, would I say this to someone I care about?

當你注意到消極的自我對話時，停下來問一問：我會對我關心的人說這些話嗎？

If not, rephrase it with the same compassion you'd show them.

如果沒有，請用你對他們的同情重新措辭。

Before we go to stage four, here's a little something to support you on your mental health journey.

在我們進入第四階段之前，這裡有一些小東西可以在你的心理健康之旅中為你提供支持。

Brain sigh wherever you go is a reminder of your own mental health.

無論走到哪裡，腦中的嘆息都是對自己心理健康的提醒。

We'll be here for you whenever you need.

只要您有需要，我們隨時為您服務。

Link in bio.

生物中的鏈接。

Stage four, self-coddling, where most people stop.

第四階段，自我編碼，大多數人都會在這一階段停止。

Being kind to yourself and treating yourself to the finest things in life is great, but what happens when it goes too far?

善待自己，讓自己享受生活中最美好的事物固然很好，但如果太過分了，會發生什麼呢？

Here's the tricky part.

棘手的問題來了。

Self-coddling can feel like self-love, but it's not.

自我編纂會讓人覺得是自愛，但其實不然。

Self-coddling is when you comfort yourselves in ways that hold you back, like making excuses to avoid discomfort.

自我暗示是指你們用阻礙自己的方式來安慰自己，比如找藉口逃避不適。

It prioritizes short-term relief over long-term growth, keeping you stuck.

它優先考慮短期緩解，而不是長期發展，讓你無法自拔。

For example, you plan to exercise but hit snooze, telling yourself, I deserve rest.

例如，你打算鍛鍊身體，卻打起了盹，告訴自己：我應該休息。

While rest is important, constantly using it as an excuse prevents progress.

休息固然重要，但一味以此為藉口就會阻礙進步。

Instead of skipping your workout entirely, say, I'll do 10 minutes instead of a full session.

與其完全放棄鍛鍊，不如說：我只鍛鍊 10 分鐘，而不是一整節課。

Unlike self-love, which empowers you to grow, self-coddling keeps you in a cycle of self-pity and stagnation.

自愛讓人成長，而自我溺愛則讓人陷入自怨自艾、停滯不前的怪圈。

It feels good in the moment, but limits your potential in the long run.

當下感覺良好，但從長遠來看卻限制了你的潛力。

Remember, self-love is about doing what's best for your future self, not what's easy right now.

記住，自愛是為未來的自己做最好的事，而不是現在做容易的事。

So how do you prevent yourself from falling into this trap?

那麼，如何防止自己掉入這個陷阱呢？

This leads us to the next point.

這就引出了下一個問題。

Stage five, accountability and growth.

第五階段，問責與成長。

This is where you realize that indulging too much in comforting things and staying in self-pity or a victim mindset isn't getting you anywhere.

這時你就會意識到，過分沉溺於安慰性的東西，沉浸在自怨自艾或受害者的心態中，是不會有任何結果的。

This stage is about appreciating your progress while staying committed to the person you want to become.

在這個階段，你既要欣賞自己的進步，又要致力於成為自己想要成為的人。

It means celebrating your strengths and small wins, like handling a tough conversation better than you would have a year ago.

這意味著要慶祝自己的優勢和小勝利，比如比一年前更好地處理了一次艱難的談話。

That's real growth.

這才是真正的增長。

At the same time, it's about taking responsibility for the areas you need to improve.

同時，也要對自己需要改進的地方負責。

If you've been avoiding a difficult conversation with a loved one, accountability means addressing it because it's essential for a healthier relationship.

如果你一直在迴避與夫妻進行艱難的對話，那麼責任感就意味著要解決這個問題，因為這對建立更健康的關係至關重要。

Start small.

從小事做起

Each week, write down three things you're proud of to remind yourself of your progress.

每週寫下三件你引以為豪的事情，以提醒自己取得的進步。

Then set one daily goal that helps you grow, whether it's journaling, making that call, or keeping a promise.

然後設定一個有助於你成長的每日目標，無論是寫日記、打電話，還是信守承諾。

Every small step builds a self-trust and brings you closer to the person you want to be.

每一小步都能建立起自我信任，讓你更接近自己想要成為的那個人。

Stage six, self-discipline.

第六階段，自律。

The final stage is self-discipline.

最後一個階段是自律。

Be practical application of accountability.

切實實行問責制。

This is where you consistently show up for yourself, even when motivation fades.

在這裡，即使動力消失，你也要始終如一地表現自己。

Growth doesn't happen without effort.

沒有努力就不會有成長。

Self-discipline ensures you follow through on what matters, whether that's exercising, journaling, or setting boundaries.

自律能確保你堅持做重要的事情，無論是鍛鍊、寫日記還是設定界限。

A good way to start is by creating a simple routine of small steps that align with your goals and building consistency over time.

一個好的開始方法是，根據自己的目標制定簡單的日常小步驟，並隨著時間的推移保持一致。

Remember, the self-love journey is not straightforward.

請記住，自愛之旅並非一帆風順。

Some days you're making progress, and on other days you slip back into old habits, and that's okay.

有的時候你在進步，有的時候你又回到了舊習慣中，這都沒關係。

What matters most is you keep moving forward, even when it feels tough.

最重要的是，即使感覺困難重重，你也要勇往直前。

If you find yourself stuck in the self-coddling stage, don't be discouraged.

如果你發現自己停留在自我編纂階段，不要氣餒。

Recognizing it is a step towards growth.

認識到這一點是邁向成長的一步。

Treat yourself with kindness as you work on self-appreciation and self-discipline.

在自我欣賞和自我約束的過程中，善待自己。

Progress takes time, and every step, no matter how small, brings you closer to the person you want to become.

進步需要時間，每一步，無論多麼微小，都會讓你更接近你想成為的那個人。

So what stage are you in in your self-love journey?

那麼，你的自愛之旅處於哪個階段？

What's the most difficult part of loving yourself?

愛自己最困難的部分是什麼？

Share your stories and thoughts in the comments section.

在評論區分享您的故事和想法。

It could be helpful for someone who might be struggling.

這可能會對正在苦苦掙扎的人有所幫助。

And if you found this video helpful, like, subscribe, and share.

如果您覺得本視頻對您有幫助，請點贊、訂閱和分享。

You can also watch this video for more insights on self-coddling.

您還可以觀看這段視頻，瞭解更多關於自我編碼的見解。