That was an essay I wrote when I was 11 years old

這是我在十一歲時寫的文章題目

and I got a B+. (Laughter)

我得到了B+ (笑)

What I'm going to talk about: nothing out of something, and how we create.

我要談的就是：我們要怎麼樣無中生有

And I'm gonna try and do that within

我要試著在大會規定的

the 18-minute time span that we were told to stay within,

18分鐘內完成這件事

and to follow the TED commandments:

並且遵守TED的嚴格戒律

that is, actually, something that creates

也就是實際上造成

a near-death experience,

某種瀕死的體驗

but near-death is good for creativity.

不過「瀕死」對創意是有益的

(Laughter) OK.

(笑) 好

So, I also want to explain,

所以我也會解釋

because Dave Eggers said he was going to heckle me

因為戴夫艾格思說他會猛烈詰問我

if I said anything that was a lie, or not true to universal creativity.

如果我說了任何謊話，或是不符合普遍的創意條件

And I've done it this way for half the audience, who is scientific.

而且是對著將近一半是科學家的觀眾這麼說

When I say we, I don't mean you, necessarily;

當我說我們的時候，我指的不必然包括你們

I mean me, and my right brain, my left brain

我指的是我跟我的右腦跟左腦

and the one that's in between that is the censor

而左右腦之間的是審查器

and tells me what I'm saying is wrong.

它告訴我我說錯了什麼

And I'm going do that also by looking at

我也會一併審視

what I think is part of my creative process,

我認為屬於我創意過程中的一部份

which includes a number of things that happened, actually --

包括許多發生過的事情，而事實上

the nothing started even earlier than the moment

沒有別的事情在這之前發生

in which I'm creating something new.

我正在創造新的東西

And that includes nature, and nurture,

包括先天的跟後天的

and what I refer to as nightmares.

我指得是噩夢

Now in the nature area, we look at whether or not

先天的部份，我們要看看

we are innately equipped with something, perhaps

我們自身是否俱備某種事物，或許...

in our brains, some abnormal chromosome

在我們的腦裡，一些不正常的染色體

that causes this muse-like effect.

會引發像是靈感的效果

And some people would say that we're born with it in some other means.

有些人說我們天生就有靈感

And others, like my mother,

其他人，像是我媽

would say that I get my material from past lives.

會說我是從過去的的生活得到靈感

Some people would also say that creativity

有些人也會說創意其實是

may be a function of some other neurological quirk --

神經突然接錯線

van Gogh syndrome -- that you have a little bit of, you know, psychosis, or depression.

某種梵谷症狀--當你有點，你知道，精神不正常，或是陷入低潮

I do have to say, somebody -- I read recently

我得說，有種人--我最近在書上讀到

that van Gogh wasn't really necessarily psychotic,

梵谷不見得是精神異常

that he might have had temporal lobe seizures,

他可能有癲癇問題

and that might have caused his spurt of creativity, and I don't --

那可能激發他創意湧現，而我--

I suppose it does something in some part of your brain.

假設那會在你的腦中某個部位引發某作用

And I will mention that I actually developed

我也會提到事實上我在幾年前

temporal lobe seizures a number of years ago,

也有癲癇問題

but it was during the time I was writing my last book,

就發生在我寫上一本書的時候

and some people say that book is quite different.

有些人就說那本書讀起來挺不一樣

I think that part of it also begins with a sense of identity crisis:

我認為其中一部份起因於認同的危機感：

you know, who am I, why am I this particular person,

我是誰啊，我怎麼會那麼與眾不同，

why am I not black like everybody else?

我到底是誰？為什麼膚色沒跟其他同學一樣黑？

And sometimes you're equipped with skills,

有時候，你就是具備一些技能

but they may not be the kind of skills that enable creativity.

但不是可以帶來創意的技能

I used to draw. I thought I would be an artist.

我以前還會畫畫。我曾以為我會成為一個畫家

And I had a miniature poodle.

這是我畫的迷你貴賓狗

And it wasn't bad, but it wasn't really creative.

似乎還不壞，但實在算不上什麼創意

Because all I could really do was represent in a very one-on-one way.

因為我所能做的不過是把它們一個個畫下來

And I have a sense that I probably copied this from a book.

而且我想我可能還是從一本書上抄下來的

And then, I also wasn't really shining in a certain area that I wanted to be,

當時我在我真正想要展現的領域以乎並不出色

and you know, you look at those scores, and it wasn't bad,

你知道，你看著那些成績，是不差

but it was not certainly predictive that I would one day make

但也絕不可能讓我預測到

my living out of the artful arrangement of words.

有天我竟然能用寫作來謀生

Also, one of the principles of creativity is to have a little childhood trauma.

創意的其中一項原則是擁有童年的心理創傷

And I had the usual kind that I think a lot of people had,

我想我有的創傷和一般人一樣

and that is that, you know, I had expectations placed on me.

你懂的，來自父母對子女過分熱切的期望

That figure right there, by the way,

那具人體模型，順帶一提

figure right there was a toy given to me when I was but nine years old,

是我在九歲的時候得到的一件玩具

and it was to help me become a doctor from a very early age.

它是從小培養我想成為醫生的物品

I have some ones that were long lasting: from the age of five to 15,

還有一些持續比較久的心理創傷：從五到十五歲

this was supposed to be my side occupation,

成為一個鋼琴家理應變成我的第二職業

and it led to a sense of failure.

但最終它只變成我感覺失敗的來源

But actually, there was something quite real in my life

但事實上在我人生中是有一些真實的心理創傷

that happened when I was about 14.

發生在我十四歲的時候

And it was discovered that my brother, in 1967, and then my father,

就是發現我的兄弟，在1967年，然後我的父親

six months later, had brain tumors.

六個月以後，雙雙長了腦瘤

And my mother believed that something had gone wrong,

我母親相信有些事情出錯了

and she was gonna find out what it was, and she was gonna fix it.

她想找出問題，然後解決它

My father was a Baptist minister, and he believed in miracles,

我父親是個牧師，他相信神蹟

and that God's will would take care of that.

他相信神會解決那些問題

But, of course, they ended up dying, six months apart.

但當然，相隔六個月，他們都過世了

And after that, my mother believed that it was fate, or curses

在那之後，我母親相信那是命運，是詛咒

-- she went looking through all the reasons in the universe

她找遍了宇宙間所有可能的理由

why this would have happened.

來解釋為什麼這件事會發生

Everything except randomness. She did not believe in randomness.

除了偶然以外所有的理由。她不相信偶然

There was a reason for everything.

每件事都有原因

And one of the reasons, she thought, was that her mother,

她相信其中一件原因出自於她的母親

who had died when she was very young, was angry at her.

她認為早年過世的母親一直怨恨她

And so, I had this notion of death all around me,

所以我總被死亡的陰影籠罩著

because my mother also believed that I would be next, and she would be next.

因為我母親還相信我會是下一個，或是她會是下一個

And when you are faced with the prospect of death very soon,

當你面對死亡的時候

you begin to think very much about everything.

你會開始認真思考每件事情

You become very creative, in a survival sense.

從一種為了生存的角度來說，你開始非常有創造力，

And this, then, led to my big questions.

這讓我想到一個大問題

And they're the same ones that I have today.

一些我今日仍然在想的問題

And they are: why do things happen, and how do things happen?

為什麼事情會發生，它們是怎麼發生的？

And the one my mother asked: how do I make things happen?

和我母親問的那句：我如何讓這些事情發生的？

It's a wonderful way to look at these questions, when you write a story.

在撰寫故事的時候，這都是一些很重要的問題

Because, after all, in that framework, between page one and 300,

因為你必須在三百頁的篇幅中回答這些問題：

you have to answer this question of why things happen, how things happen,

為什麼事情會這樣發生，它是怎麼發生的

in what order they happen. What are the influences?

事情發生的順序和影響

How do I, as the narrator, as the writer, also influence that?

我，身為一個敍述者，一個作者，對這個故事又有什麼影響？

And it's also one that, I think, many of our scientists have been asking.

我想這也是所有科學家所問的問題

It's a kind of cosmology, and I have to develop a cosmology of my own universe,

我在我的世界中發展出自己的宇宙觀

as the creator of that universe.

像一個宇宙的創造者。

And you see, there's a lot of back and forth

這中間有許多的反覆

in trying to make that happen, trying to figure it out

嘗試著創造，嘗試著理出頭緒

-- years and years, oftentimes.

年復一年，總是如此

So, when I look at creativity, I also think that it is this sense or this inability

當我想到創作力的時候，我也認為這是因為我無法

to repress, my looking at associations in practically anything in life.

壓抑對日常生活中幾乎每件事的看法。

And I got a lot of them during what's been going on

我在許多事件發生時做觀察

throughout this conference,

在這個大會中，

almost everything that's been going on.

幾乎是所有發生的事情。

And so I'm going to use, as the metaphor, this association:

讓我在這裡用量子力學做比喻：

quantum mechanics, which I really don't understand,

雖然我並不理解量子力學，

but I'm still gonna use it as the process

但我將以它做為一種過程

for explaining how it is the metaphor.

來解釋為何它是個比喻。

So, in quantum mechanics, of course, you have dark energy and dark matter.

在量子力學中，有著暗能量和暗物質。

And it's the same thing in looking at these questions of how things happen.

就像我們嘗試解釋事情為何會發生的時候

There's a lot of unknown, and you often don't know what it is except by its absence.

有許多未知，你不知道那是什麼，只知道它不在

But when you make those associations,

但當你嘗試找出關聯性時

you want them to come together in a kind of synergy in the story,

當你希望能在故事中把事件連接起來時而產生綜效時

and what you're finding is what matters. The meaning.

你突然發現了事物的核心。它的意義。

And that's what I look for in my work, a personal meaning.

這就是我在我的作品中所想要找尋的，對我而言的意義。

There is also the uncertainty principle, which is part of quantum mechanics,

在量子力學中還有測不準原理，

as I understand it. (Laughter)

至少我想是有的。（笑）

And this happens constantly in the writing.

這也時常發生在寫作中。

And there's the terrible and dreaded observer effect,

還有一種可怕的觀者效應，

in which you're looking for something, and

當你在找尋一些事情的時候，

you know, things are happening simultaneously,

那些同時發生的事情，

and you're looking at it in a different way,

你嘗試用不同角度去看它，

and you're trying to really look for the about-ness,

你嘗試找出它和其他事物的關聯性，

or what is this story about. And if you try too hard,

或是這個故事和什麼有關。如果你過分強求，

then you will only write the about.

最後你寫下的只是「關聯」。

You won't discover anything.

卻什麼也沒發現。

And what you were supposed to find,

而你應該找到的，

what you hoped to find in some serendipitous way,

你真正希望能找到的，在無意中，

is no longer there.

卻已經不在了。

Now, I don't want to ignore

我並不想忽略

the other side of what happens in our universe,

在宇宙另一邊發生的事，

like many of our scientists have.

像一些科學家所做的一樣。

And so, I am going to just throw in string theory here,

所以在這裡我也要順便談談弦理論，

and just say that creative people are multidimensional,

證明創意人不僅是多面向的，

and there are 11 levels, I think, of anxiety.

還有著十一種層次的焦慮。

(Laughter) And they all operate at the same time.

（笑）而且它們全部一起發生。

There is also a big question of ambiguity.

再來還有模棱兩可的問題。

And I would link that to something called the cosmological constant.

像是你們說的宇宙常數。

And you don't know what is operating, but something is operating there.

你不明白什麼在運作，但有些事情在運作。

And ambiguity, to me, is very uncomfortable

模棱兩可是一種非常不舒服的感覺，對我的人生來說

in my life, and I have it. Moral ambiguity.

但它仍然存在。道德的不確定性

It is constantly there. And, just as an example,

總是存在著。舉例來說，

this is one that recently came to me.

最近剛發生了一件事。

It was something I read in an editorial by a woman

我讀到一篇由女性寫的報紙的社論

who was talking about the war in Iraq. And she said,

內容是關於伊拉克戰爭時。她說，

"Save a man from drowning, you are responsible to him for life."

「救一個溺水者，你便得為他的一生負責。」

A very famous Chinese saying, she said.

她說這是一句很有名的中國諺語

And that means because we went into Iraq, we should stay there

意味著既然我們進入了伊拉克，我們便應該長駐

until things were solved. You know, maybe even 100 years.

直到事情解決。你知道，就算要上百年

So, there was another one that I came across,

還有另一個例子

and it's "saving fish from drowning."

就是「拯救溺水的魚」

And it's what Buddhist fishermen say,

來自信仰佛教的漁夫們

because they're not supposed to kill anything.

佛教徒基本上不該殺生

And they also have to make a living, and people need to be fed.

但漁夫卻仍得謀生，養家

So their way of rationalizing that is they are saving the fish from drowning,

為了將殺生合理化，他們聲稱自己是在救溺水的魚

and unfortunately, in the process the fish die.

但魚不幸地在過程中死了。

Now, what's encapsulated in both these drowning metaphors

暗藏在這兩個溺水故事中的比喻是

-- actually, one of them is my mother's interpretation,

其中一個說法來自我母親

and it is a famous Chinese saying, because she said it to me:

因為這是她對我說這是中國人常說的

"save a man from drowning, you are responsible to him for life."

「救一個溺水者，你便得為他的一生負責。」

And it was a warning -- don't get involved in other people's business,

那是一種警告：別管別人的閒事

or you're going to get stuck.

免得被纏上

OK. I think if somebody really was drowning, she'd save them.

但我想如果真的有人溺水的話，她還是會救他們的

But, both of these sayings -- saving a fish from drowning,

但這兩種說法，不管是救溺水的魚，

or saving a man from drowning -- to me they had to do with intentions.

還是溺水的人，這取決與你的意圖

And all of us in life, when we see a situation, we have a response.

我們在人生中，都得對我們身邊發生的事情做出反應

And then we have intentions.

懷抱著各自的意圖

There's an ambiguity of what that should be that we should do,

在我們應該做的，和最後真正做了的兩者之間

and then we do something.

有一些模棱兩可之處

And the results of that may not match what our intentions had been.

而結果也不一定符合我們原本的意圖

Maybe things go wrong. And so, after that, what are our responsibilities?

說不定事情搞砸了。若當如此，我們的責任又在哪？

What are we supposed to do?

我們該怎麼做？

Do we stay in for life,

我們該留下來負責

or do we do something else and justify and say, well, my intentions were good,

還是嘗試合理化我們的行為，說，我的本意是好的

and therefore I cannot be held responsible for all of it?

所以我不應當負全責？

That is the ambiguity in my life

這便是我人生中很難接受的模棱兩可

that really disturbed me, and led me to write a book called

甚至讓我因此寫了本書，就叫做

"Saving Fish From Drowning."

拯救溺水的魚

I saw examples of that. Once I identified this question, it was all over the place.

一旦你意識到這個問題，就發現它無所不在

I got these hints everywhere.

在哪裡都能看到它的痕跡

And then, in a way, I knew that they had always been there.

同時我也知道，它們一直都在那裡。

And then writing, that's what happens. I get these hints, these clues,

在寫作上，我看見這些暗示，這些線索

and I realize that they've been obvious, and yet they have not been.

我意識到它們一直都在那，但又隱身不見

And what I need, in effect, is a focus.

我需要的是焦點

And when I have the question, it is a focus.

當我有一個問題要問的時候，它就是一個焦點

And all these things that seem to be flotsam and jetsam in life actually go through

那些在人生中的災難都會過去

that question, and what happens is those particular things become relevant.

那個問題，和在那些事件中所發生的事都是有關聯的

And it seems like it's happening all the time.

而且它無處不在，不停發生

You think there's a sort of coincidence going on, a serendipity,

你以為它不過是偶發事件，或是碰巧發生的

in which you're getting all this help from the universe.

或許是來自宇宙的幫忙

And it may also be explained that now you have a focus.

也可以解釋成，心中有了焦點以後

And you are noticing it more often.

你更能發現它的存在

But you apply this.

當你開始應用它

You begin to look at things having to do with your tensions.

你開始檢視那些令你緊張的事情

Your brother, who's fallen in trouble, do you take care of him?

當你的兄弟遇上了麻煩，你該幫助他嗎？

Why or why not?

為什麼要，又為什麼不要？

It may be something that is perhaps more serious

它或許比你想像的更為嚴肅

-- as I said, human rights in Burma.

像緬甸的人權問題

I was thinking that I shouldn't go because somebody said, if I did, it would show

我本來想著我是否不應該去，因為有人告訴我

that I approved of the military regime there.

我在那裡出現意味著我支持當地的軍權統治

And then, after a while, I had to ask myself,

但一陣子以後，我自問

"Why do we take on knowledge, why do we take on assumptions

「為什麼我們要在意他人對我們的想法，

that other people have given us?"

或認知？」

And it was the same thing that I felt when I was growing up,

這和我在成長過程中的感覺很像

and was hearing these rules of moral conduct from my father,

我身為牧師的父親

who was a Baptist minister.

給我們的所有規則和道德指標

So I decided that I would go to Burma for my own intentions,

最後我決定照我自己的想法去緬甸

and still didn't know that if I went there,

而我仍然不知道，到了那裡

what the result of that would be, if I wrote a book --

寫一本書，結果又會如何