but it's usually like in a dark time of my life.

The Weirdest Canned Food Taste Test

- [Voiceover] Brown bread, raisin flavored!

- You're gonna have to...

- Oh.

- Oh, it's coming.

I loosened it for you.

- Yeah, sure.

- I like it.

- Oh, it's so "raisin-y".

- It doesn't taste like raisins, though.

- I do feel, though, if they would serve this to me

on a plate at a fancy restaurant,

I'd be like "oh, chante, this is amazeur".

- You can can bread.

- I, for one, would rather die by zombies.

- [Voiceover] A sample of rattlesnake meat

in the purest form.

- Aah, no! I don't even want to eat normal rattlesnake,let alone in a can.

- God, it's awful looking.

- How we go from bread to rattlesnakes?

How did that happen?

- (laughs) This was a very quick escalation.

- That smells pretty damn good.

- Smell it, smell it, smell it.

- No, that's from a snake.

(man laughs)

- [Both] Cheers.

- Aah, I'm sorry, aah!

- I mean, it's more like venison, pork...

- Ew, the spine, it's a spine!

- There's a snake spine in here.

- We work hard, we deserve boneless canned food.

- And especially boneless rattlesnake.

- Like, you could definitely put this in foods

that a chicken would be in or something,

(man laughs)

and you could just pass off and get away with it.

- I hope there's a prize in here

and it's just a little rattle.

- [Voiceover] It's octopus. - [Man] It's octopus, oh!

- Ooh!

- [Both] Ugh!

- Don't waste time nor money in cooking it,

cutting it, or keeping it frozen.

- Oh, it's a tentacle!

- Yeah, tentacle!

- When they get calamari, all the white people are like

"oh, I want the rings, I don't want this stuff

"with the tentacles".

- You would hang out with people that say stuff like that.

- Freshy fishy.

- It's too chewy, it's like it never ends.

Like, I keep chewing it to get it to go away.

- I know, and then the flavor keeps coming out.

- I don't like it.

- I mean, if you're trying to improve your jaw strength--

- [Woman] Yeah, like that. - [Man] This is the best meal.

- It feels like gum.

- Ugh, stop it.

- [Both men] Fried chicken in a can.

- [Woman] Fried "chik'n".

- So you're giving me fried chicken in a can,

and it's not even real fried chicken?

- Ooh, how does it, it does not need to be that thick.

(man laughs)

- There's no reason it needs to be this big.

- It smells like dog food, like one you mix in.

- Oh yeah, it smells like Fancy Feast.

- Hmm.

- It became a liquid so fast.

- We can call it fried chicken, they're vegetarian,

they won't know, they don't know what fried chicken

tastes like 'cause they're vegetarians.

- It makes me feel lonely.

- Are you gonna give us a fake turkey now?

- It's Thanksgiving, you're gonna give us

a fake processed turkey in a can?

Jesus tap dancing Christ.

- [Voiceover] Alligator in Cajun-style gravy.

- We got some Cajun-style "alligata"!

(man laughs)

- That smells delightful.

- It look primordial as shit.

- Kind of smells like Cup O' Noodles

like with Sriracha in them.

- Really Cajun.

- Nice spice.

- If I had to have a choice during the Apocalypse

or whatever this would be it.

- Like, too soft, it's too soft.

- This opened up a whole new world for me

'cause this is not bad.

- I don't think most people have alligator and rattlesnake

canned foods, but, for a lot of people, canned food

is a reality, it's a part of life,

it's something you need eat to survive.

- Mm-hmm.

- The fact that I can sit here in a chair

surrounded by lights and say which ones I,

joke about which ones tasted disgusting to me,

I mean, that's coming from a place of privilege,

and I don't forget for a second how lucky we are.

- Yeah.

- Also, fuck this and I don't want to eat it ever again.

- True.

- How is smoke-flavor an ingredient?

- I don't know, maybe they just have a smoker standing there

at the end going (blows smoke).

- Ew.

- And now you "'ave" fried chicken with smoke "flava".

- So they're French as well?

- I mean, if I had to hire a person to smoke on my food,

I would hire a French person, 'cause at least it'd be sexy.