Umm ... maybe if it's happy hour--I am so broke.

I know, I can't even afford Whole Food; I have to shop at Trader Joe's.

The only apartment I can afford is three buses and two hours away, but this is the only job I could get.

I am so broke.

-Look at my phone. - Is that a 6 plus?

Yeah! I dropped it when I did "molly" at the music festival in the desert that we all flew to.

I'm just too broke to fix it.

Dude, that's nothing.

My parents kicked me out of the family plan.

That's like my nightmare.

I'm just start getting bills.

(Speaking Spanish) I've finally saved enough money to talk to my wife in Honduras for ten minutes.

We're sorry, the number you have reached is ...

I am on the juice cleanse for spring break, Cancun.

But the only thing that's cleansing is my bank account.

I know it's not healthy but fast food is the only way I can feed my kids.

Why are smoothie so expensive?

Well my broke ass can't even afford Spotify Premium.

I have to listen to an ad every 30 ...

Years I worked at that plant, then it shut down.

And I'm too old to be hired anywhere else.

My friends actually like, "Do you want to see a movie?"

And I'm like, "Yeah, if it's on Netflix, or Hula Plus or HBO Go." I am just so...

Broken--the whole leg.

And I don't have insurance, so I hope it just stay like...

This weekend when I went to Palm Spring, I have to rent a room on Airbnb instead of the whole apartment.

After Jeff lost his job, we got foreclosed on.

Now, we're squatters in our own home.

There's just so many weddings this year.

I can't afford to divorce my abusive husband.

I can't afford a gym membership and Soul Cycle.

Can I get a venti double sea salt mocha chai frappa latte skinny soy chino.

Same.

I'll take a medium--I'm broke.

Ok, that will be 40 dollars.

Oh my god, I think I'll need to put it on the emergency Amex my dad gave me.

Same.

Oh! Don't forget this, I need the purchase. I just want to get a free coffee.

Sometimes I leave the maggots on.

Because it's fresh protein.

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