Well, well, if it isn't sammy baker...

Davis, junior. [ chortling ]

Hi, grandpa. Oh, I've got one for ya.

Knock, knock. Who's there ?

Who. Who, who ?

Helen, we've got an owl out here in the hall. [ chortling ]

Oh, fred, fred, leave her alone.

You'll make her tinkle. Oh, come on, helen.

Oh, sam, let me look at you.

Oh.

Fred, she's gotten her boobies.

[ fred chortling ] I'd better go get my magnifying glass.

Oh, and they are so perky !

[ sighing ] I can't believe my grandmother actually felt me up.

[ gong clangs ]

What's happenin', hot stuff ?

His name is long duk dong. [ gong clangs ]

What ? Long duk dong.

He came down with grandma and grandpa baker.

He's an exchange student that's living with them.

Yeah, well, he's totally bizarre. He is not.

He is a very sweet boy.

I just hope you boil the sheets and mattresses after he leaves.

I don't suppose it makes any difference to you,

But there's a very weird chinese guy up in mike's room.

Ginny dumped rudy. He's her new fiancee.

[ brenda ] mike, stop it.

Sam, honey, do you think you could help the grandmothers with supper ?

Dad and I have to go to the club for dinner with the rice chex.

Rizczechs. Oh. Rizczechs.

Uh, do you think that there's any reason...

That I should possibly stay home tonight ?

Well, it might be nice if you'd visit...

With your grandparents and long duk dong.

Who ? [ gong clangs ]

The weird chinese guy in mike's room. Oh.

- I think I have a dance to go to. - Well, that's okay.

Oh, can you remember to turn off the stove in 20 minutes ?

I can remember lots of things.

[ chuckling ]

[ sighing ] this is the single worst day of my entire life.

What the hell are you bitchin' about ?

I gotta sleep under some chinaman named after a duck's dork.

Well, where am I sleeping ?

Sofa city, sweetheart.

ś [ heavy metal ]