BECAUSE THEY WANT TO ASK YOU--

WELL, LAUREN O'BRIEN FROM ATLANTA, GEORGIA,

WANTS TO KNOW IF WE WORK OUT TOGETHER.

- WE WALK TOGETHER.

WE WALK IN SANTA BARBARA A LOT.

WE DO A LOT OF HIKING, WHICH IS REALLY NICE,

'CAUSE WE CAN GET TO CHAT AND WALK AND--

IT'S MUCH HARDER TO WORK OUT TOGETHER

AND WALK AROUND OUR NEIGHBORHOOD

'CAUSE THERE ARE TOUR BUSES EVERYWHERE,

SO, YOU KNOW, IT'D BE KIND OF WEIRD FOR US TO WALK--

- BUT IT'S NICE.

WE'VE STOPPED AND TAKEN PICTURES.

AND THE TOUR BUS HAS STOPPED. - WE HAVE.

- AND WE'VE BEEN FRIENDLY WITH THE TOUR BUSES.

- WE HAVE, AND ACTUALLY, THE OTHER DAY,

I WAS DRIVING HOME, AND I COULD SEE WHERE WE LIVE.

I WAS AT THE LIGHT.

AND THERE WAS A TOUR BUS, AND I COULD HEAR...

[mumbling] "ELLEN DEGENERES."

SO I THOUGHT, "I WONDER WHAT THEY'RE SAYING?"

SO I ROLLED DOWN THE WINDOW, AND OVER THE P.A.--

THAT LOUDSPEAKER THING-- THE GUY DRIVING SAID,

"IS THAT YOU, PORTIA?"

LIKE, HE COULD SEE STRAIGHT THROUGH THE--

[laughter]

AND I WAS LIKE, "YEAH, IT IS."

AND HE SAID, "I WAS JUST SAYING THAT ELLEN OWNS THAT BUILDING"--

WHICH WE DON'T.

BUT IT WAS JUST HILARIOUS.

- SO NOW THEY THINK WE OWN THE BUILDING?

WE DON'T JUST LIVE IN IT, WE OWN THE BUILDING?

- NOW WE OWN A BUILDING. - WOW.

- WHICH IS GREAT.

- WE SHOULD COLLECT RENT FROM THOSE PEOPLE.

- IT WAS REALLY EMBARRASSING THOUGH.

- GWEN RAGLAND FROM SPOKANE, WASHINGTON,

WANTS TO KNOW WHICH ONE OF US IS A BETTER DRIVER.

AND I THINK WE BOTH KNOW.

- [sighs]

WELL, HERE'S THE THING.

IF YOU EVER LET ME DRIVE... - I DO.

- I THINK THAT YOU WOULD DISCOVER

THAT I AM ACTUALLY THE BETTER DRIVER.

- I HAVE LET YOU. - SHE DRIVES SO FAST.

I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU.

- I DRIVE FAST BUT VERY SAFELY.

- YES.

SHE'S A VERY GOOD DRIVER,

BUT NOT EVERYBODY ELSE ON THE ROAD

IS AS GOOD AS YOU, AND--

- THAT'S WHY I'M ALWAYS LOOKING AT OTHER PEOPLE,

TO MAKE SURE THEY SEE THAT I'M COMING.

- SO FRIGHTENING.

[laughter]

- I DRIVE VERY, VERY SAFE.

I'M ALWAYS LOOKING IN FRONT OF ME.

I'M CHECKING MIRRORS.

I'M-- YOU--

- IF YOU EVER ARE ON THE FREEWAY AND YOU SEE--

YOU THINK YOU SEE SOMETHING SHOOT BY YOU, IT'S HER.

- NO.

- SO FAST. - THAT'S NOT TRUE.

IT'S JUST, COMPARED TO HOW SLOW YOU DRIVE,

YOU THINK THAT FEELS FAST.

BE HONEST. - I DO DRIVE VERY SLOWLY.

I DRIVE LIKE A GRANNY.

- YOU DRIVE SLOW, AND YOU CAN ONLY DO ONE THING AT A TIME.

YOU CAN ONLY FOCUS ON DRIVING. - [groans]

- SO THAT'S WHY-- - REALLY?

- YEAH. - YES, IT'S TRUE.

I'M NOT A GREAT MULTITASKER. HUSH.

- YOU KNOW WHEN I'VE LET YOU DRIVE?

IS WHEN I'M SICK, REMEMBER? - THAT'S TRUE.

SICK AND GRUMPY ABOUT BEING SICK.

IT'S NOT A GOOD COMBINATION. - WELL, NO ONE WANTS TO BE SICK.

OF COURSE YOU'RE GRUMPY. - TERRIBLE.

LAURA SZEKELY FROM-- SEE, THESE ARE THE--

YOU KNOW HOW I'M ALWAYS STRUGGLING?

WHERE IS THIS IN HUNGARY? SAY THAT WORD.

- [laughs] - SAY THAT WORD.

- UM, "MAJ-I"--

- "MAJIA"-- MAGYAREGRES, HUNGARY.

- HUNGARY.

- SHE WANTS TO KNOW HOW YOU'RE ENJOYING TWITTER.

- OH, I LOVE TWITTER. - YOU JUST JOINED TWITTER.

- YEAH, LIKE, THREE WEEKS AGO, I JOINED TWITTER,

AND THE FIRST WEEK, I JUST HAD MY HEAD IN MY PHONE.

LIKE, I COULDN'T DO ANYTHING OTHER THAN--BEYOND TWITTER.

I ACTUALLY REFER TO IT AS THE WEEK I LOST TO TWITTER.

IT WAS THE FIRST WEEK.

BUT SO I'M CALMING DOWN A LITTLE BIT NOW,

BUT THE FIRST COUPLE OF DAYS WERE SO EXCITING

BECAUSE I GOT SOME FOLLOWERS, LIKE, STRAIGHT OFF THE BAT,

WHICH WAS GREAT.

AND REMEMBER WHEN I TOLD YOU THAT FIRST WEEKEND--

I SAID, "BABY, I'VE GOT 32,000 FOLLOWERS."

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU SAID TO ME?

DO YOU REMEMBER? - I THINK I DO.

- YEAH, YOU SAID, "OH, THAT'S GREAT, HONEY.

I HAVE 32 MILLION."

[laughter]

- GUESS HOW MANY I HAVE NOW?

- I DON'T KNOW, .8--32--

- 33 MILLION. - OH.

- YEAH. BUT YOU'VE GONE UP TOO.

- WELL, I HAVE 70 NOW.

- NOW YOU HAVE 70...THOUSAND. - MAYBE .1.

- THOUSAND. - SO THAT'S GOOD.

PEOPLE SHOULD FOLLOW PORTIA,

BECAUSE SHE'S FUNNY AND CLEVER, AND YOU...

- AND I TWEET OUT PHOTOS OF HER WHEN SHE'S NOT LOOKING.

- YOU'RE CONSTANTLY TAKING PICTURES OF ME.

I TURN AROUND, AND I'M LIKE, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

AND YOU'RE TWEETING OUT PICTURES OF MY BACK.

[laughter]

- IT'S TRUE. - ALL RIGHT.

- CHECK MY LAST TWEET. IT'S HER BACK.

- WE'RE GONNA--OH, DID YOU TAKE ANOTHER ONE OF MY BACK?

- NO, NO, JUST THE ONE. - OKAY.

ALL RIGHT, SO WE'RE GONNA TAKE A BREAK.

AND THE LAST QUESTION IS JUST--

SAMANTHA FROM HIGHLAND, NEW YORK,

SAID, "ARE YOU ENJOYING 'SCANDAL'?"

ISN'T--YOU'RE LOVING "SCANDAL." - LOVING "SCANDAL."

- CAN I JUST SAY-- 'CAUSE PEOPLE GET REALLY INTO

THESE CHARACTERS, AND SHE'S THE SWEETEST,

NICEST PERSON THAT YOU'LL EVER, EVER MEET.

DON'T GET MAD AT HER,

'CAUSE IT TURNS OUT SHE'S GONNA BE EVIL.

I THINK SHE'S GONNA BE--

LIKE, I THINK THEY'RE MAKING YOU OUT

TO BE A REALLY BAD PERSON,

AND I DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO CONFUSE THE CHARACTER.

YOU'RE THE SWEETEST, MOST ADORABLE

CHARMING PERSON I KNOW.

- WELL--AW.

- AND DON'T-- DON'T HATE ON HER, BECAUSE...

[laughter]

IF I DIDN'T KNOW HER, I'D BE SO MAD AT HER.

I THINK YOU'RE GONNA--

- OH, YOU'RE GONNA GET MADDER TOO.

- YOU'RE GONNA RUIN EVERYTHING. - YEAH.

[laughs]