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  • Man, how are ever going to get girls like Usher and T-Pain?

  • We can't afford that expensive Patron they always drink.

  • Dude, we're never going to get girls

  • to drink this nasty stuff.

  • Ugh, yeah.

  • Maybe if it tasted like a gummy bear.

  • [DING]

  • [LIQUID POURING]

  • (SINGING) Girl, start real fresh.

  • I'll take you on a journey, shots so ill

  • you'll be leaving on a gurney.

  • So bottoms up, mama didn't raise a dummy.

  • Me and Jeff getting crunk, doing shots of gummy.

  • Girl, don't even fight it.

  • I know you want to bite it.

  • You sounded so excited before you even tried it.

  • Maybe I was wrong, and you know I'm going to ride it.

  • Send you gummy shots UPS, overnight it.

  • Girl, you make the champagne pop.

  • Pop, pop.

  • Oh, girl, I'm going to buy you a shot.

  • I say girl, On the couch, I'm going to save you a spot.

  • Oh, girl, you know I like the bathtub hot.

  • Well, you know I can't afford no expensive brandy,

  • so I pour an Old Crow and chase it down with candy.

  • Because it's breaking my heart that it caused you pain,

  • you can tell by the slow-mo yell in the rain.

  • Baby girl, say the word when you're home alone,

  • I'll be on your doorstep with a shot of Patron.

  • Then I'll take you to the beach in the Florida Keys or a real

  • nice dinner at an Applebee's.

  • Break down in the middle of the spot,

  • I'm going to buy another round while you're

  • checking these shots-- the money shot, the rim shot, butt

  • shot, body shot, not rapping shot, bad metaphor-- shot?

  • Yeah.

  • Girl, you make the champagne pop.

  • Oh girl, I want to buy you a shot.

  • I said girl, I want to take you on a cruise in my yacht.

  • Oh girl, got to admit it's not a real job.

  • It's not real.

  • Oh, yeah.

  • Gummy Shot Glasses.

  • Buy them now at Vat19.com.

  • Vat19.com, purveyors of curiously awesome products.

  • Vat19.com.

  • [MUSIC PLAYING]

Man, how are ever going to get girls like Usher and T-Pain?

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