(gong)

(orchestral music)

Alcohol.

- Whoa.

I like getting drunk,

I hate hangovers.

- Everything hurts.

- Try Guys are gonna try different alcohols

and compare them.

- We wanna see how different alcohols affect us.

- Four weekends.

Four types of alcohol.

- Watch out.

- [Keith] This is science, ladies and gentlemen.

Barely science.

- There's a lot of myths about alcohol intake

and there are some tips that you could use to be safer

that are based on research.

- Chaos.

- How're we gonna measure the quality of our drunkenness?

- One: How turnt are you?

Did I say that right?

How turnt?

- Two: The hangover.

How (bleep) do you feel the next morning.

- And three: The personal factor.

- My third factor is how hungry I get.

- I notoriously get wild and crazy when I get drunk.

- When I go out drinking with my wife,

we go home early.

- How much I talk to girls.

(offscreen whooping)

Do I...

♫ Havin' fun with a bicycle ♫

- [Keith] My favorite thing is beer.

You can just sit back, drink beer,

have good conversations.

- [Voiceover] Oh come on.

- [Eugene] We decided to move our drinking to a brewery.

- Beer contains more carbohydrates and calories

than some of the other alcohols.

- It's a conversational drink.

- It's so nice.

- It's a drink to be had with friends.

- So silly.

- It's absorbed more slowly

because the other calories that're being worked on.

- I wanted to kick off a little steam,

but I wanted to take it easy.

- I was (bleep) bored out of my mind.

Let's just continue drinking

and see where the night takes us.

(yelling)

- [Zach] This is the thing that Eugene does

is that, when he's drunk he just (bleep) leaves.

- It's not that I'm bored,

it's just that people are boring.

- We're his friends.

- We're his friends and playing Jenga.

- (bleep) Jenga.

(bleeps)

- [Keith] Ned was barely drinking.

- [Ned] I'm turnt city.

- [Keith] He wasn't drunk,

but he was so like, drunk.

- I feel hammered.

- Keith's hunger factor was good.

- [Keith] I get hungry guys.

I love to eat.

- [Eugene] Zach had negative girl points.

I don't think Zach talked to one woman the entire night.

And I talked to maybe 50.

- [Zach] Beer night overall, it was okay for me.

I didn't get too drunk,

I wasn't too outgoing,

actually, now that I'm saying this out loud,

it was pretty awful for me.

But no hangover, hey.

- [Keith] Good beer night.

- Good beer night.

- So we're about to go meet

at Chris Reinacher's birthday party.

- [Ketih] Let's get crunkified.

- To really do the test to see which would cause

the worst hangover,

you've gotta make sure that you're giving the person

equal amounts of alcohol in that beverage.

- [Zach] That's definitely more than a shot.

Very scientific.

- [Keith] Vodka sucks.

It's just (bleep) rotten potato juice.

- [Eugene] But I always associate it with

a really hardcore college party.

There's a gong in this house.

- Vodka night got crazy.

Vodka night got too crazy.

- Everyone get in the tub with me.

- Binge drinking can be very dangerous

and that's where someone takes a large amount of alcohol

in one day, in one sitting, or in one evening.

(laughter)

- I don't actually know how many drinks I had.

- This is out of control.

- Are you guys doing a weird experiment

at my birthday party?

- Yes.

(gong rings)

- Everyone take a shot.

- Something went horribly wrong last night.

- Vodka, duh.

- [Dr.Keith] That's where accidents may happen,

people's judgement

and their physical coordination is impaired.

- Mango chutney.

- I ate four sandwiches.

I became activated immediately.

- How many girls have you talked to?

- [Zach] I have talked to a few.

By Eugene.

- Where did he go?

- [Zach] Where does he ever go?

- [Eugene] Goodbye try guys at house party.

- Do you wanna bring them?

- [Eugene] They are not gonna go to the strip club.

- Why?

I am going to a strip club, will you guys come?

- What, no, we can't go to a strip club.

- Oh God we went to a strip club.

- Well I woke up this morning

with all of my makeup still on.

And this in my purse.

On vodka, there's only one thing you can do.

And it's go to a mother (bleep) strip club.

- [Zach] Sure enough, Eugene and Kelsey disappear

within fifteen minutes.

- We're super (bleep) cool.

- Vodka makes you irresponsible.

I drank more than I expected to,

stayed out way later than I expected to.

Being in a party environment

encouraged me to rage more with my friends.

- Night phone.

- They took all of my covers.

Dogs, stop being dogs.

- Quite frankly we don't know

what the underlying cause of the hangover is.

(groans)

- I don't think I drank enough water.

- Your thinking and your judgement

and your motor skills are impaired.

- [Keith] The doggies keep running on my face

when I take my face out.

- I feel pretty great.

No hangover at all.

(groaning)

Headed to a workout.

- I myself was surprised to find out

that there's a fair number of automobile accidents

that occur when they're suffering from a bad hangover.

- [Eugene] Do you guys like sleeping with Keith?

- Yes we love to keep him awake.

(orchestral music)

- Wine makes me want to be fancy.

- It's our third Friday,

It's wine day.

- Something we actually do pretty often

is we start drinking at the office

before we go out.

So Zach and I went to the liquor store next door,

bought a couple bottles of red,

one bottle of white,

because (bleep) white wine.

You've gotta let it aerate.

- Cheers.

- Just hangin' out, let's relax,

destress with some wine.

- It's been a Friday.

- It's been a Friday.

- [Eugene] Got some wine at the office,

drank there, some wine at Quinta's wrap party,

we drank there.

- Teeth check.

And gotta do tongue check.

- [Eugene] Then of course we went to a restaurant.

And I felt that that was where it was most appropriate

to have wine.

Free bred is like when someone you meet

just shows you their privates.

- I've never thought that.

At this point I'm realizing,

Man, I'm spending way, way more money.

- I've just ordered about $100 worth of food and drinks

for myself.

Problem two with drinking wine all night.

- [Dr.Keith] Wine can make you sleepy.

All alcohol is sedating, it's a sedative.

- [Ned] When my wife get's sleepy,

that means it's time for me to get sleepy.

- [Keith] Then I got home and I think I ate some potatoes.

- [Zach] Eugene ditched us,

as he is want to do.

To be honest, I was pretty grateful

for a relatively tame night.

- The next morning.

- Red wine in susceptible people,

can cause a headache.

- I woke up with the worst wine headache ever.

- Chronic headaches like migraines,

they're susceptible to headaches

and the red wine triggers it.

- A relatively tame night.

Tame night.

- Tequila shots.

- [Eugene] The quickest way to go from point A to point

(makes noise)

- This is dumb.

- [Zach] This is the one that I feared the most.

It's a double.

- Watch out.

- From a biological perspective,

you're gonna get a faster effect

and a slightly greater effect

from a single shot of hard liquor

as compared to wine and beer.

- I have to go to the airport

and I think I'm still drunk, oh no.

- What a time.

- To mistakes that will be made.

- We had tequila shots

and put little dots on our hands.

- [Zach] We're dancing,

all in my living room with my dogs.

Four shots in a little over an hour.

I don't feel drunk yet, which is the problem.

- [Dr.Keith] It's easy to get in over your head

pretty quickly with shots.

- I didn't feel anything and now I feel a lot.

- [Keith] The more I think about it,

I think all we did was take shots and dance.

(upbeat electronic music)

- Maximum amount of alcohol intake

that's considered healthy,

no more than five drinks in a 24 hour period for men,

and no more than four drinks in a 24 hour period for women.

(inaudible yelling)

- If you feel like you drank so much

that you don't remember what happened,

or you've done things that you later regret,

those are some of the warning signs

that suggest you could have a problem.

- I realized that because of the way I party,

I didn't really know what happened

with the other three guys the other nights.

Hey guys, I'm gonna try something

for the first time in my life.

I'm gonna drink responsibly.

Tonight I'm gonna stay with you three

and I'm gonna help you all achieve your objectives.

- This was the first night that I've ever gone out

drinking with Eugene

that he actually was like,

"You know what, I'm gonna hang out with you guys."

- Don't drink so much, have a little water,

and you could help one of your best buds get some action.

- Zach is totally makin' out right now.

- She's got two cats.

Yo, my friend Zach likes cats.

- I'm not the kinda guy who's gonna kiss and tell.

- His tongue was just plunging in her throat.

- Ned is giving money to the go-go dancers

with his wife's support.

- [Ned] I'm not good at this.

- What happened by the end of the night?