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  • HARRY Steal an anthem from The Who. LIAM Who?

  • HARRY Take Tenacious D's old concept. (Tribute)

  • LOUIS Swipe a character from Cruise. Little girls won't know the difference.

  • ZAYN We can't write or dance or play or sing, But we're pretty good at modeling.

  • 1D Here's a half ass track that they slapped together. If you just hit mute it'll sound much better.

  • We'd write our own songs, but we can't do better. If we just stay cute we can sing whatever

  • NIALL I could go bla bla bla

  • ZAYN I can go Fart fart fart fart

  • ALL We could go (GIANT BURP)

  • LITTLE GIRL Oh my god I could taste it!

  • DIRECTOR Don't forget do guy stuff.

  • NIALL Like football?

  • DIRECTOR No, Piggyback leapfrop and grabass (I'll show you)

  • LIAM Help me trash this ladies' desk

  • SECRETARY I just work here, wha?

  • ZAYN Throwing papers is so badass.

  • SECRETARY Hey why do you have to mess with me? As if this job weren't already shitty.

  • ALL Cus they make us play like we are rebellious.

  • We can't be bossed around, at least that's what they tell us. We're just really a bunch of polite young fellas.

  • If we disobey them, they're gonna geld us, And make us go

  • oh oh oh E e e While they touch our butthoooooles

  • DIRECTOR Whoooo.

  • LOUIS You know you know I know I know

  • LIAM Louis' finally lost it

  • Hee Haw, See saw, EEEEAWW

  • DIRECTOR Hey let's take his wallet.

  • SECRETARY 2 What the F. You little bitches wrecked my desk.

  • You better clean up this mess Or we're gonna kick your ass.

  • 1D Trying to be badass was a failed endeavor

  • HARRY I bet would could take them if we worked together

  • 1D We're running out of words we can rhyme with ever.

  • KOA TEAM This might be our last 1D Parody ever.

  • BIEBER But like the great Justin Bieber said "Never say Never."

  • All right enough. I'm sick of this boy band crap. Cut. Do the logo thing.

HARRY Steal an anthem from The Who. LIAM Who?

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