Ready to go here?

Uh, yeah, come on in.

It's over here.

Thanks, we would've had trouble finding it.

I changed my mind!

You can't have him!

Okay, okay, Alan, Alan,

what about the kids?

Screw 'em!

We're gonna need another minute.

Oh, Charlie, why?

Why, why, why, why, why?!

Why?!

White people.

Hello, Dad?

Right here.

Oh, hey.

Something's different.

Your uncle's piano is gone.

Oh, yeah.

Were we robbed?

Yes, we're the latest victims of the piano thieves

that have been plaguing the beach.

Damn, they got my good bong.

What?

Oh, man, that is so wrong.

No, it wasn't a robbery.

Walden's redecorating.

Cool.

You know, for some reason,

your uncle's death is really starting to hit me.

I mean, I don't know if I was in de...

What are you doing?

Um, a toast to Uncle Charlie?

Nice try.

You're not the only one who misses him, you know.

Really?

You never talk about it.

I need a beer to loosen up.

Not gonna happen.

Now, come on, talk to me.

I don't know, Uncle Charlie just never treated me

ike I was some stupid kid.

That's nice.

He treated me more like a stupid person.

Well, I know he loved you.

Then how come he didn't leave me anything?

Well, you don't measure love by things.

I disagree.

Nothing says "I love you" like a Mercedes CL600.

Hey, the Mercedes was leased.

And is that all your uncle meant to you- a nice car?

Of course not- I learned a lot from him.

Like what?

Well, let's see.

If it doesn't fit, don't force it.

It's always better to say sorry afterwards

than ask for permission before.

And if it's burning, bleeding, or oozing,

go to see a doctor ASAP.

Oh, God.

But probably the most important thing I learned

is that by the time I'm his age,

want to be married and have a family.

You know, there was a time

when I would have found these things disgusting.

And now?

There's a certain wistfulness

mixed in with my revulsion.

Really?

Yeah, Uncle Charlie was very lonely, Dad.

Yeah, yeah, he was.

And I don't want to be like him.

Well, good for you.

Of course, I don't want to be like you either.

Even better.

By the way, do you have a number for this Dr. Asap?

He's not listed anywhere.

What?

I mean, I don't need him right now,

but I want to have him on speed dial, so if I do,

I can get him as soon as possible.

ASAP?

Yeah, him.

A-S-A-P?

I know how to spell it, Dad, I'm not an idiot.