Justin from Just Indecerous dot com

and today as part of Adult Sex Ed Month we're gonna be talking about what BDSM is

so on your knees, look at me, and listen.

Epic guitar intro

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Generally speaking BDSM is a catch-all term a set of erotic practices

or a form of sexual expression where the idea of power is exchanged between the

participants involved.

and if none of that makes any sense to you I'll break it down for you now.

B - Bondage, basically tying your partner up,

restraining them in some way.

D - Discipline, the rules that your sub has to follow

and the correction of those by some means of punishment

D - Dominance, the Dominant person (role) with the power exchange

"Oh slave it's been such a long day, rub my feet

and fellate me." S - Submission

the submissive person (role) in the power exhange

"oh yes oh how would you like me to fellate you today?"

S - sadism enjoying the feeling of causing other people pain.

"my dick gets so hard when I hear you scream in pain"

M - masochism, enjoying the feeling of pain, getting off on being hurt

"Ouch Sir that really hurts please, may I have another?"

now wait a minute are you trying to tell me that somebody likes pain? Yes I'm

Trying to tell you that somebody likes pain

pain isn't necessarily a bad feeling of course if you break your arm or break your leg

or crack your

ribs, that's not the kid of pain you want. However controlled

use of pain can be very pleasurable for people as it releases endorphins into the

body and you get a feeling very similar to that

of "runners high" what you feel after orgasm.

And it's not all about pain although

many people tend to believe that it is (all) about pain, it's not all about pain

it's all bad and exposure to a mixture of different sensations

hot and cold, hard and soft, light, heavy impact

sensory deprivation, sense play. Can be anything.

As I said BDSM is all about power exchange that means there are two

(generally) defined, very distinct roles

You have the Top or the Dominant person, you have the bottom

the submissive person. The Dominant decides what's going to happen,

the submissive person has it happen to them. You also have switches

these are people who don't have an inclination one way or the other or

preference

they can either be Dominant or they can be submissive

they choose when they want to do it. It's up to them. A scene is the setting that your

BDSM activities take place in

so that could be your bedroom, your living room, could be anywhere.

some people go to professional dungeons, some people have their own dungeon.

I hate you if you have your own dungeon!

Some people have their fortress of fuckery, some people have their bastion of

buggery, Whatever you want to call it

this is the scene. Think of an actor, think of them

acting within a scene. Play is what you're doing within the scene

it's the acts that you are committing while you're in a scene.

Again think of an actor. Actor comes to do his scene

he has to act in that scene, he's performing his part.

play is the actual things that you are doing, a scene is the place that you

doing it in or the environment that you've created to do it in

or the setting that you have created to do it in. Types of play are numerous I

could list them all day and I would still only be at the tip of the iceberg but just

as few examples for you

you've got bondage, you've got control, you've got nipple play, you've got breast

torture, you got cock and ball torture

you've called spanking, flogging, caning you've got to light sensations, wax play

all of this is done, all of this play all these scenes are done with safety in mind in

fact safety comes before you cum ;)

and BDSM tends to follow two standard principles. The first being

SSC which is "Safe" i.e we know what we're doing

we practice what we do and we learn more about what we're doing in order to

create a safe environment when doing these things

that includes making sure that you're clear of STI's, make sure you practice safe sex

also use safe words in order to communicate what we want something

changed, when want something stopped

and this can be anything from banana to Apple

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, anything!

any kind of safe word to stop play immediately. "Sane"

we're not nuts, we're not trying to intentionally harm somebody

well we are trying to internationally harm somebody we're just trying to

not harm them too much

and make sure that they are within their limits and consensual

we are doing these things to a person who wants to have them done to them

everybody agrees what is gonna happen before it happens

and the limits are all laid out well in advance

or you also have the RACK which is risk

Risk Aware Consensual Kink which is the same thing with the onus a little bit

more on the individual

the most important thing to note is the fact that consent or consensual

exist in both of these standard principles it is the difference between

abuse and BDSM you have consented that is

BDSM you don't have consent that is abuse

and fuck you if you do that. Who does this?

anybody can do this you probably know some people that do this they just don't

talk about it

your coworker at work probably does this, a relative

of yours does this, the person sat next to you right now could possibly do this

your partner may do this have you asked them if not you should

okay so there you have it that's my basic

of what BDSM is so hopefully you've learnt something obviously there's a lot more

detail that you can go into and I will be in other videos on specific topics

in far more depth than what we've covered here this is just a brief overview

in the meantime I do encourage you to go to other adultsexedmonth.com

have a look at the articles that are going up throughout the month of June if

you want to get involved with the conversation you can on Twitter using the

hashtag

#AdultSexEdMonth I will put all of the links for everything that we've talked about today

as well as some recommended reading

in the description below and if you want to check out anymore of my stuff you can do at

justindecerous.com

so until next time be good

and if you can't be good be safe.