*bryan groaning off camera*

Shut up Bryan!

I wrote this song for you

Bryan: You cheating swankified *bleep*

Hey I'm filming here!

Anyways, I-I hope this makes you happy.

*piano music plays*

I love your hair, your smile, your clothes

Bryan: I love your fat abnormally large toes

Shut up! You are ruining the video!

Bryan: Scoot over! Yah, Yah you remember me?

Bryan!

Bryan: Yah well you should, cuz you took my heart out and shoved it down my esophagus.

Bryan: Well, you should remember that. Okay? You cheated on me with my very own brother over here. You jerk!

Let it go! dude, okay? that was like three months ago

I'm trying to film something.

Bryan: Fine but i'm not moving

*starts to play again* I love your hair, your smile, your clothes

Bryan: I love your cankles and your elephant nose.

*plays again* I love your freckles and your eyes

Bryan: Don't forget about her thunder thighs

Girl, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

Bryan: It hurt, she landed on her face.

Girl I need to put on my to-do-list.

Bryan: or my hit list, whichever really works

If you were a booger I'd pick you first

Bryan: Well, I'd lick you first.

What?!? Thats- thats so wrong, that's disgusting

Bryan: I would lick her, as in I would punch her in the face

Bryan: I might make you look prettier

Both: Girl, your everything I,

Bryan: DON"T

Both: want, you're everything I

Bryan: DON"T

Both: need, without you I

Barely, Bryan: can finally

Both: Breathe

Bryan: You're so fat, you got arrested at the airport for 10 pounds of crack

Bryan: Not even Clinton would sleep with you, when trucks stop they beep like you

Bryan: No one wants to be with you. I never want to see you again

Bryan: your like the elephant men, you look like you seriously stopped a van with

Both: Your face

Is like the sun

Bryan: Yep, it burns my retinas

You got beautiful puppy dog eyes

Bryan: Maybe you should go to the vet, you smell like a pig, and look like a fish

Bryan: If you were a cow, i'd put you right on a dish, You're crazy like a monkey, you belong in a zoo

Bryan: If you were a horse i'd turn you right into glue

Your eyes are like a pond in which the fish of beauty swim

Bryan: You have a mustache like my dad, you really need a trim.

Both: All I really want to say is I

Love Bryan: hate

Both: You

Bryan: I hope you die, you stupid *bleep*

*Bryan slams on keys*