Sh*t! Have I ever washed this?

Secret Thoughts Women Have

Is that my period?

Oh, God! Am I bleeding through my pants?

Do I smell?

Oh, no, I was wearing this bra last time we hooked up too.

Now he's gonna think I only own one bra.

He thinks I'm disgusting.

Time to poop.

Of f*cking corpse!

Oh my... What? Do you two live here?

Can't you hang out outside of the bathroom?

Damn! I thought I had a hair tie.

I wonder what happened to all the hair ties I bought?

How on earth do I shed this much and still have hair?

Oh God! I just made direct eye contact with his penis!

I wonder what it would be like to have a penis.

Is one of my boobs bigger than the other?

Oh, yea, definitely is.

Oh my god, did I just pee a little or is that my period?

Or did I just get wet?

Am I secretly turned on?

This bitch thinks I don't know what she said about me three weeks ago.

Has he noticed my mustache?

Or maybe he is looking at that one extra long piece of hair on my chin.

Ooh! maybe I'll wear a dress today.

Ugh. Pants it is.

Damn, I should have washed my hair today.

Sh*t! Do my armpits smell?

Did I shave my armpits?

Am I pregnant?

Wait, I haven't had sex in two months, that's not possible.

Unless, I am the next immaculate conception.

Oh my god, no one would even believe me.