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Have you ever had
an uninvited guest?
Why did you wear sweatpants
the day she wore that dress?
You put a book on it.
Your woodie wouldn't quit.
Think of disgusting things,
and don't encourage it.
And then it starts to ache.
Zipper's about to break!
You're using every trick to try to train your trouser snake.
Listen and listen good.
Don't cover up your wood.
A woody never should
ever have to be caged or blocked.
Unlock your jock.
Just let it pop
Like a jack in a box!
Show 'em that your willy works!
A stiffy shouldn't have to hurt!
Make 'em scream
OH!
MY!
GOD!
as you shock 'em with your lightning rod!
Baby, let you mojo rise!
It doesn't matter what the size!
You don't have to feel
ashamed!
Like Miley, it just can't
be
tamed!
Boing, boing, boing.
Even bigger than a
boeing, boeing, boeing!
Sometimes, it can be annoying, -noying -noying,
But, now you confidence is gro-oh-wing!
Put your package on
display!
Even if they scream and run
away!
You're the jockey of your one
eyed
horse!
I'm talking 'bout your dong
of
course!
Someday, when you're old
and bored,
You'll wish that you had shown
it more!
It's the reason that the world
was
born!
Every girl believes in u-ni-corns!
Doing, ding, dong.
Someday, random chubbys will
be
gone!
Doing, ding, dong.
'Can't believe I wrote a whole
schlong
song!
THE KEY OF AWESOME!
Hey, everybody.
Thanks for watching The Key of Awesome.
You can get all our songs on iTunes, check us out on Facebook, and don't forget to subscribe.
*nurse tries to put fireworks out*
You can't put it out.
It's never goin' out.
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