As a matter of fact, 94% of you are gonna take jobs where they're gonna teach you dumbass shit or stuff that you already know.

說實在的，你們 94% 的實習只會教你們沒有意義的東西或者你已經會的東西。

They are... they're mailing in their internships.

學生們忙著到處投履歷申請實習。

Interns, it's not about what you're going to learn this summer, my friends,

但各位實習生，我的朋友們，實習的重點真的不是在於你這暑假會學到什麼，

it's going to be who you meet.

重點在你這暑假認識了誰。

Please understand as you go into this internship,

在你踏入實習生涯之前，請了解，

maximize networking, shake hands, kiss babies.

你必須極力拓展你的人脈，和人們握手，博取他們的芳心。

If you're a wallflower, don't even do internships.

如果你是個邊緣人，不擅長社交的話，那就不要去找實習。

Like... like... not the classic way, like... like... obviously, you have a skill to learn.

至少不要找一般的實習，很明顯的，你得在實習中學會某個技能。

You're lucky enough to be a developer or something like that but fine.

如果你很幸運的，學的是技術專業，那沒事。

But like if you're an intern,

可是，如果你是個實習生，

please understand it is the human connections that you're gonna make.

請了解在這過程建立人脈才是你的必修學分。

Way too many people roll in and think they're going to learn something about advertising or marketing or media or startups.

有太多的人認為實習之後他們就會學到有關廣告、行銷、媒體，新創等的知識。

You're not. You're just not.

你不會， 你不會學到這些。

You're not. Just saving you time.

你真的不會學到這些，我先跟你講清楚，免得浪費你的時間。

And if you do, it's just this much.

就算你學到東西了，也就只有這麼多。

It's 3% of the equation.

它只佔了成功方程式的 3%。

Please attack the other 97.

你還有 97% 要攻下。

Go to every after hours event.

所以咧，下班後請積極去參與每個交際活動。

Say hello to everybody.

和大家打招呼。

If you go into an office where everybody's head down,

如果你到了一間每個人都低頭做事的公司，

it's not that kind of culture,

沒有這種文化的話，

figure it out. Hack it.

山不轉路轉，路不轉人轉。

Be the obnoxious intern that was too bubbly.

去當個難纏又熱情的實習生。

And make sure you attach yourself,

自己找「寄生宿主」。

even if you go into an office, law firm,

即使你去的是法律事務所，

where everybody is head down,

每個人都低頭做事，

if you see that one person that looks up and gives you a glimmer of people skills,

只要你發現一個與眾不同的人，而且對方還展現出了社交能力的話，

Attach yourself to that person. Let them bring you to things.

緊跟上去！透過他們的能力帶你長見識！

Interns, use this time wisely.

實習生，請你善用實習的機會。

Way too many of you go in and you think you're gonna get something.

有太多的你們去了實習，認為你們會學到東西。

And in reality, the magic was sitting right in front of you.

但事實是你經常搞錯重點，忽略了這個擺在你眼前最重要的事。

And the punchline, my friends, is it's the people.

總歸一句，我的朋友們，人脈才是重點。

It's the people. It's the people that you meet in that office that go work somewhere else,

人才是點石成金的關鍵。重點是和你一起上班的人去別的地方工作時，

that are reminded by your hustle and tenacity and good natureness

他們記得你的幹勁，你的堅持和你的好，

and offense and you went for it, you attached for it, you wanted it

他們記得你多麼的想要，你努力爭取，你多麼的積極，

and... and they're the ones that give you the opportunities.

這些人就是會為你帶來機會的人。

This is a very simple world. This is a people world.

這個世界很簡單，人脈就是一切。

Not the black and white skills you learned this summer in eight weeks.

不是你在暑假這 8 個星期學到的技能。

Half of you are going to get coffee and do dumb shit, 'cause they disrespected you, inappropriately.

你們當中有一半的人只會做捧咖啡和打雜的工作，因為公司不尊重年輕人，不願意給你們機會。

So please, even if you are in that 50% that's getting dumb shit and coffees and things of that nature, say hello.

所以就算你只能幫忙打雜、捧咖啡等之類的，

Drop a coffee off to somebody and they've got a Cardinals pennant

當你拿咖啡給你同事時，記得和他們打個招呼，如果他們桌上插著紅雀隊的旗子，

and you know something about the Cardinals, say something.

而你又對紅雀隊有些了解的話，說些什麼吧。

Say something about Adam Wainwright.

和他聊關於紅雀老將 Adam Wainwright 的事。

Create relationships. It is the only KPI.

建立關係，這是你唯一的關鍵績效指標（KPI）。

It is the only ROI of an internship.

也是你實習唯一的投資報酬。