YouTuber for the first time in years, I set out to find what it means to be a youtuber in 2017

Clickbait Anthony, clickbait

I've been out of the loop for years now, and I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing now

Hey what's up you guys? Hey guys, what's up? Hey what's up guys? Hey! What's up you guys? Yes!

I'm gonna be famous I'm gonna be famous

Hey, what's up you guys?

Fuck!

I contacted thousands of YouTubers

No one agreed, and I realized I should probably reword my email

A few agreed to teach me anything I wanted to know. After weeks of preparation,

I put on my best interviewer shirt and traveled the world to learn how to really be a YouTuber in 2017.

Hi

Hey, sorry I'm late Joey. Thank you so much for for responding to my email.

Yeah! Uh huh

Hey Jon! Thank you so much, I'm sorry I'm late.

Dude, don't worry about it

Sorry I'm late. Hey Anna

Sorry I'm late.

That's okay

We shake it okay?

Thank you so much for doing this, thank you

Very welcome

Well welcome to my home

I love what you did to the place

Uh huh. That's nice

Sorry... can you help me?

Oh, sure you just move it up. I prefer not to touch

No touching

Hey

Hey, hey sup

It's a long flight

hey hey guys oh hi!

Yeah, sorry I'm late

We've been waiting for half an hour

What is he wearing?

Seeing as how,

Every one of your videos gets about 50 million views I wanted to just ask your advice on some stuff.

Oh well

What do you wanna know?

First question what's it like to be a youtuber in 2017?

It's sometimes hell, because it's so life consuming.

I eat a lot of ice cream. Okay. I cry a lot I

Haven't made a video since 2016 technically so I don't really I don't know what that question is

Is that it is that it dig on me or

Feels like you need to be all the time like super active?

It's like two or three, five videos a day if you can

Three to five?

Say goodbye to your family, your dog, your cat and

Just go to work.

So no more family. Okay,

What's what's the hardest part about being youtuber in 2017?

Finding the will to live

Um it's probably having to do brand deals.

Do you do it?

Yeah, often but it's only because that's what needs to be done for me to be a millionaire

If there's one thing you learned the hard way on Youtube., what would that be?

People will always be offended by what you say

I'm honestly not racist, but will I make fun of white people for the words they use

Like I just made a white joke to you before we started shooting, but when you-

That was a joke?

Okay, good. Good to know.

Don't mix business and pleasure

Okay, so you sleep around the Youtube community and get a reputation

Did you do that?

Yes

Can I ask with who?

I didn't see their faces was the big thing, it was just a big hole

Right if I were to say like

Flabbergasted would you-

Thats- see, yeah you're white, thats a white thing

Is it?

Yeah

What if I'd say

Uh, this is bamboozled

*Laugh*

So it was just like a bathroom stall at Vidcon?

Yes, yes, I thought it was one of the booths, but

Um, apparently petroleum Jelly does not advertise at Vidcon

What should I make the thumbnail and title of this video in order to ensure I'll get enough views that

I won't have to move back into my mom's basement?

Definitely exploit everyone that you have in this video

"This video should be deleted"

Or "They don't want you to see this"

Right

That type of thing

"I'm probably going to delete this"

Yesssss

We could both get naked and blur it out on the thumbnail, thats a big one

I think the thing that people like to do with me is analyze my love life

So maybe could be like the secret about my newest relationship. Okay? Yeah

So be like

You should put brackets at the end of the title saying gone sexual. (I LOVE DAN AND PHIL SO MUCH I JUST HAD TO SAY IT ON HERE)

Accident, death

Oh sorry, almost choked to death (on what ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

I can make that the title, I almost choked to death

The problem is people don't really care about you yet

And I don't think we should trick people thinking that we're in a relationship

Yeah, it's just I have a boyfriend

D-D-D-DENIED

Now if I choked Lily Singh

Right

You have a thumbnail

Lily is in this video

Can you act like you're choking her and I can maybe photoshop it

Um sexual accident

Uh just sexual death, yeah

Everyone you collab with you should kiss

Oh really

What if we like made it look like we were going to kiss in the thumbnail you think that would get views?

Thats a great one, yes

Should I like have a sexual death right now, so it's like

(Both) Yes

(Sexual moaning)

*Dead*

He's trying his best Phil

I'm sorry (for laughing)

That's about right? Yeah.

Okay. You need to be watching from the sidelines like this.

Oh, okay, okay?

no homo bro

Yes, I'm choking really right here. Yeah, and then you're looking on. Perfect!

(Both) I think we got it.

Thats gold

How should I come up with ideas for my channel now that I have no one and I'm all alone

You can just basically be really popular. It's just following other people's ideas.

Steal from other youtubers. I do it all the time

Recreate it just with you.

Without giving them credit?

Yeah

No? no credit?

No.

That's what youtube is about baby.

Oh, just doing what other people have done.

Yeah

Hmm.

You were saying that you're alone now

You could always start some youtube drama

Can do you think you guys can help me start some drama

Go Phil, go

You look like

A weasel that's been crying

Shit man. I mean that started it.

Did you hear what-did you hear what this

Emo said about me (airhorn)

What kind of video would you like to see me make now that I'm all alone

Um, I think you were onto something

With the pokemon

Yeah

Bullshit

Definitely no shirt.

No shirt

Yeah like just came out of the shower

No shirt, so you got that glisten going on

Oh okay?

Yeah

I'm okay with no talk-like a silent film, like a silent shirtless film

(Both) Follow the trends

And you will find the views

Slime videos do really well

Slime?

Yeah! Have you ever made slime?

(Both) More Pokemon

More lip-synching, more Pokemon lip syncs with your best friend?

I mean truly, I think you're half of a whole here

Hot knife?

Maybe not hot knife anymore.

I think imma try to bring hot knife back. It's been a while

Hot spoon?

Hot spoon!

And then maybe you could like lip-sync to some like theme songs

Like but there's a problem there because

(Both) Copyright

Write your own theme song

I'll do it right now

*Anthony beat-boxing*

Anthony~, he's alone

*Silence*

True

A bath full of stuff

Bath full?

Yeah, literally, just fill your bathtub up with something

Do you think it would be good for me to get in the bath full of stuff and

Look directly at the camera and say "I'm feeling so bath-full"

*Laughing*

Yeah

Yeah?

Okay

You know every youtuber has this thing that they embrace that makes them stand out. What is it for me?

I think you have a symmetrical face

That's not true

Well you used to have the hair, but now you don't

Well you chop the hair off leaving me alone

Phil for gods sake

Drop it

Um

We had the same hairstyle, we all-we stayed together

Because I copied your hairstyle

You copied my hairstyle?

Yeah, I would actually go to the hairdresser with a picture of you and be like I want this haircut

No, you did not

Yeah

No you did not

Yeah

No you did not

Yes

What?

Why

Are you serious?

Yeah

What?

What!?

If you could come up with a slogan for my channel, what do you think it should be?

A good one for you-ooh this is a good one

Its okay if you can't pronounce my last name

It used to be shut up. So now it could be keep talking

Keep talking?

Yeah

Don't shut up

One half of something great

One half of something great?

Yeah

Subscribe so I'm not homeless. You gotta, you gotta, you gotta say it like you you mean it like

Good

I'm-I'm hungry

At the beginning of my video I'd be like "keep talking!"

*Laugh*

Like that?

No, maybe not

Thats bad.

Do you know what it [how to pronounce his last name] is?

Padilla (Puh-Dilluh)?

No

(Lilly tries to pronounce Anthony's last name)

*Laughing*

One half of something great

(Both) One half of something great!

One half of something-

I messed up

For the record it padilla put another [El] tortilla. Yes, Adelia [Dom]

What types of comments should I expect so now that I'm doing things on my own here?

Maybe that it's not as good as smaug always good. You're not you're nothing without [an]

Probably a lot of people want you to commit a brutal suicide

Just like lots of people saying kill yourself kill yourself kill yourself. I want to kill you

[I] don't [know] my comments were [like] I can't wait for more. Wow. Where's the next video? You suck?

Your [hair] [cut] socks the haircut sucks like basically everything about you is going to suck that

They want to do inappropriate sexual things, too

- we know both

He looks like that one guy from Smosh a little bit

But older right yeah, do you think I'll lose viewers if I'm open about the [fact] that I'm almost 30 years old

Turkey should I believe it what dirty looks like I may not be famous, but they say dress for the job you want true

So, okay, well okay, then

How old [are] you shall [we]?

14 years over team yes, you think that's good. Yeah for the job. I want dress for the job

You want doesn't mean I want your job or I want you at this point?

The universe is expanding at a rate of 67 kilometers per second and in

106 Tilian Years all the matter in the Universe will dissipate at thermal [equilibrium]

Sex tape tape sex tape you need a sex tape is that a question. [I] just wanted you to know that