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  • -[rolling tongue] Bored.

  • Bored-bored-bored-bored-bored, bored-bored. Aah!

  • Whoa! Hey! Hey, Pineapple, hey!

  • -I'm not a pineapple. I don't even look like a pineapple.

  • -You look like a pineapple

  • who stuck his tongue in a light socket. [laughs]

  • -I'm a durian, but you can just call me Spike.

  • -Durham? -Durian!

  • -Dorian? -[enunciating]: Durian.

  • -[gasps] DeLorean? Yay!

  • Let's go back to the future! [laughs]

  • -Durian! I'm an exotic flavorful fruit.

  • I'm not a time-traveling car!

  • -Okay, okay. "Point" taken. [laughs]

  • -You think your words are gonna hurt me, pal?

  • I got news for ya: they aren't.

  • -Yeah, you do look pretty thick-skinned. [laughs]

  • -Actually, I am.

  • Durians are super-thick-skinned. Super-tough!

  • -Really? How tough are you?

  • -Well, I don't like to brag,

  • but you know how people say they're tough as nails?

  • -Yeah?

  • -[echoing]: Well, nails wish they were as tough as me!

  • -Crazy!

  • -I have a side job cutting diamonds...

  • with my face! -Wow!

  • -Ford originally wanted their slogan to be

  • "Built Durian tough," but I sued them

  • because their trucks aren't!

  • -Whoa! That is tough!

  • -Go ahead. Spit a seed at me.

  • -Really? -Yeah.

  • -Um... I don't think you want me to do that. -Do it!

  • -Okay. [hacks, spits]

  • [poing!] -Didn't even feel it.

  • -Whoa! [spits]

  • [poing!] -Ha, is there a draft in here or what?

  • -[spitting continuously]

  • [poing! poing! poing! poing!] -Ha! That barely tickles my fancy!

  • -Whoa! Hey, what's the toughest thing you've ever done?

  • -That's a tough question, just the way I like 'em.

  • It's hard to say, since I've been toughin' for so long.

  • Once I told Bruce Willis I didn't like his shirt.

  • Another time, I beat Clint Eastwood in a staring contest.

  • This other time, I-- -Ooh-ooh!

  • One time, I motorboated so long that I passed out.

  • -Um... okay. That's not really tough, per se, but...

  • -I'll prove it right now!

  • [inhales, fluttering lips]

  • -Yeah, I don't doubt you actually did that.

  • You don't have to prove it.

  • [fluttering continues]

  • Are you deaf? I wasn't asking for a demonstration!

  • Stop it!

  • Enough, for crying out loud!

  • I believe you can motorboat for so long

  • that you pass out, okay?

  • -[sputters down, snores]

  • -Finally, some peace and quiet.

  • -[wakes up] Whoa! -What?

  • -I had a scary dream.

  • -What was it about?

  • -I don't think you want to know.

  • -What? You think it's gonna scare me?

  • -Oh... I don't know.

  • -Come on, tell me. What was it about?

  • A dragon? A really scary clown?

  • Global warming? What?

  • -Nah. It was about...

  • Knife! [whack!]

  • -What? This?

  • Pssh... I don't even feel it.

  • -Whoa! I guess that makes you a "numb-skull." [laughs]

  • -Oh, come on, what is this?

  • Amateur night? [chuckles]

  • -Whoa! Are you okay?

  • I don't mean to pry, but he does.

  • -The more, the merrier.

  • Come on, I'll take you both on! Whoo!

  • -Yeesh, and they say I'm thick.

  • [laughs] Eww...

  • -What? Is that all you got, chump?

  • -Hey! Hey, Spike!

  • -What?! -Ax!

  • [crunch!] -Dang it!!

  • Ahhhh... doesn't even hurt!

  • -Well, that's gonna be one tough "ax" to follow. [laughs]

  • -Ugh!! -Whoa!

  • -That... kind of... tickles.

  • -Whoa, Spike. You really know how to "pick" 'em.

  • [laughs] Oh!

  • -Orange, don't forget...

  • Don't forget how tough I was.

  • [groans in agony] -Why?

  • Are you gonna "split"? [laughs]

  • -[groaning, cracking] -[groans in disgust]

  • -Ahh! Poor Spike.

  • Jeez, he really "cracked" me up.

  • [laughs] Ewwww.

  • -Hey, audience. It's me, Daneboe--

  • Oh, no it's not! It's Toby Turner!

  • Dane's in my head making me talk!

  • Get out of my head!

  • Get... whoo, he's out.

  • Phew, I felt smarter there for a second.

  • Back to normal now.

  • I suppose I'm gonna tell you to check out the sneak peek

  • of the Annoying Orange TV show on Cartoon Network

  • on May 28th, which is a Monday, at 8:30 PM/7:30 central.

  • Do that and you might see me do some acting stuff

  • and maybe even some dancing stuff.

  • It's probably gonna be the best thing

  • to ever have happened to television,

  • so you don't want to miss it, and neither do I

  • and neither does my mom or Dane's mom.

  • Nobody's mom, or their children.

  • Toby out. Huh! [Captioned by StreamCaptions.com]

-[rolling tongue] Bored.

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