School has started and that means a lot of orientation events are coming your way.

開學了，這代表有很多迎新活動要開始了

And soon enough your seniors are going to be asking you the big question.

再過不久你的學長姐們就會問你一個重要的問題

Do you want to go to the department orientation camp?

要去迎新宿營嗎？

When I say “ask,” I actually mean they just want you to go.

說「問」是好聽，其實他們就是要你去

You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.

你不想去也沒人能勉強你

But you know, they’ve probably put in a lot of effort and spent a lot of money on it

但你知道的，人家花了很多心力也花了很多錢

and they probably need you to chip in.

而且他們可能需要你分攤一些

Yes, syue jhang! This is my fee.

是的學長，這是我的報名費！

Now that’s right, syue di! Welcome to college!

學弟這就對了！歡迎來到大學！

The pros of going you get to see your classmates and seniors much faster

去的好處是你可以更快跟同學和學長姐們熟絡起來

and it might be helpful in the coming years.

接下來幾年可能會對你有幫助

Cons are.. it’s usually not that cheap and you might have to take off your pants.

缺點是，通常都沒有很便宜，而且還有可能要脫褲子

in some rare.. unlikely to happen..

在極少......不太可能發生

and actually did happen this year cases. Which happened to have made the news.

但其實今年就發生了的情況，又剛好上了新聞

That’s how I found out.

我是這樣知道的

I have a friend and who was a fraternity leader at MIT.

我有一個朋友以前是MIT某兄弟會的會長

College in the States have all these cool fraternity names like

美國大學的兄弟會都會有很酷的名字，像是

Sigma Pi, Omega Alpha, Delta, Gamma, Beta, Kappa, Delta Gamma Beta Kappa [Σ π, Ω α, Δ, Γ, β, Κ, Δ Γ β Κ]

Σ π, Ω α, Δ, Γ, β, Κ, Δ Γ β Κ （希臘字母）

They have all these mysterious symbols on their fraternity buildings

在他們的兄弟會建築物上有一堆很神秘的圖騰

and you can only know the meaning of it when you’re in the fraternity.

只有入會的人才可以知道圖騰的意義

My friend, in fact, told me that he would have to kill me if he told me what it meant.

我的朋友說如果他告訴我了就得滅我口

I can like sue him for that, right?

這樣我可以告他，對吧？

So their fraternity had all these tasks that their freshmen had to pass to qualify for the fraternity.

他們兄弟會有各式各樣的任務大一新鮮人們得通過才有資格入會

It’s like a dare challenge.

有點像是是膽大冒險

One of them was to require the freshmen to run to Harvard University nearby

其中一項是要求他們跑到鄰近的哈佛大學

pee on the Harvard statue and come back without getting caught.

在哈佛銅像上撒尿，然後再沒被逮到的情況下逃回來

That’s crazy!

瘋了！

No, on second thought, that actually sounds like something that I would do.

不過再想想，那聽起來像是我會做的事情

[Whistle sounds]

（警衛哨聲）

But things sometimes go out of control.

但有時候事情會失控

A college freshman actually died this year in the U.S. during an orientation event.

今年就有一位美國大一新鮮人在一場迎新活動中喪命

So if you’ve just entered college and people ask you to do dumb things

所以，如果你剛上大學然後有人慫恿你做一些愚蠢的事

well know when to say “No!”

要知道什麼時候該說「不」！

No one can force you to do anything you don’t feel like doing or anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.

沒有人可以強迫你做你不想做的事情或者是會讓你感到不舒服的事情

People here recently have been talking about some orientation camps that went too far.

在這裡大家最近有在討論一些玩過火的宿營

Saying provocative stuff, implying sexual matters..

講些煽情、性暗示的話

Not like I’m over-conservative..

不是我太保守啦

I can be all.. talking dirty stuff like that.. you know.. like..

我也是可以講那些...... 你知道的......就像是

You Lil’ sexy thing.. with your Lil'.. boo..

（你這性感小...... 還有你那......）

What do kids watch these days?!

這年頭的小朋友到底都看什麼長大的！？

Some require freshmen to take off their clothes and go half-naked during some outdoor events.

有些會要求大一新鮮人脫掉衣服在一些戶外遊戲時間半裸著身體

Not that all camps are like that..

不是說所有的宿營都是這樣

but you know.. there are some out there.

但你知道的，外面有一些會這樣做

Just.. you get the idea!

就是，你懂的！

But honestly, talking about orientation camps. What happened to the good old “First Dance?”

但說實在的，講到迎新宿營那美好、傳統的「第一支舞」到哪去了？

[Music] [Fist Dance]

（第一支舞音樂）

[Music] [Party Rock Anthem]

(搖滾派對國歌音樂)

And the fire-worshipping!

還有「拜火」！

[Singing worship songs]

（營火拜火歌）

And the meat to scare-the-poop-out-of-you but doesn’t really scare-the-poop-out-of-you midnight trips.

還有，就是刻意要讓你嚇破膽但其實一點都不可怕的「夜教」

[Insect sounds]

（蟲鳴聲）

[BOO!]

（驚嚇聲）

[~!@#$%^&*]

（~!@#$%^&*）

Like man! Back in the days, we really kept it simple.

我的老哥啊！我們以前真的很簡單！

Orientation camps these days have really stepped up their games!

現在的宿營真的進化超多！

Sometimes a bit over the top.

有時候有點過頭了

So if you’ve been watching the news lately I bet that’s just the tip of an iceberg.

所以，如果你最近有在看新聞我敢說那絕對只是冰山一角

But as I said, you don’t have to do whatever your seniors ask you to do.

但就像我說的，你不需要對學長姐們唯命是從

They’re like one year older than you

他們不就大你一歲而已？

and you don’t even listen to your mom and dad.

你連你爸媽的話都不會聽了

So you’re not obliged to do anything that you’re told to.

你沒有義務要聽從所有別人叫你做的事

Especially when it comes to the things that make you feel uncomfortable.

特別是那些讓你感到不舒服的事

Especially like when people tell you to take off your pants.

特別是當別人叫你脫褲子

Why am I laughing? It’s not supposed to be funny.

我幹嘛笑啦！這不應該是好笑的事

So to help you out, we came up with three ways

所以呢～ 為了幫助你，我們想出了三招

well, no, that’s two

啊.. 不對 ..這是二

Three ways on “How to keep your pants on during orientation camp?”

三招讓你宿營不脫褲

NUMBER ONE- MAMA SAID

第一招媽媽說

Hey, freshman! Take off your pants if you wanna pass this stage!

嘿！小大一！想過這關就脫掉褲子吧！

My mama told me I should keep my pants on so that I don’t catch a cold.

我媽說褲子要穿好才不會感冒

Rookie.. grow up, man!

菜鳥，趕快長大吧老哥！

This is college! Mommy’s like ten thousand miles away..

這裡是大學！媽咪在十萬八千里遠呢

Now..

現在......

My mama also told me not to take to strangers.

我媽還跟我說不可以跟陌生人講話

Yo! Freshman! I don’t think you get the picture here.

誒！小大一！我看你是搞不清楚狀況

Mom~ there’s this stranger that keeps talking to me.

媽～有個陌生人一直跟我講話說耶

NUMBER TWO- ASK QUESTIONS

第二招問問題

Hey yo, syue di! Come over here! Come over here!

嘿學弟！過來這！過來這！

I’m the keeper of this stage

我是這關的關主

and I say.. Take off your pants!

關主說：「脫褲子！」

Why?

為什麼？

‘Cos I can give you bonus points, that’s why!

為什麼？因為我可以給你額外的分數！

Why do I need bonus points for?

我要額外的分數幹嘛？

So you can pass..

你才可以過關

Like pass my first midterm examination?

像是～ 過第一次期中考嗎？

No!

不是！

So are they like credits for graduation?

所以～ 是畢業學分嗎？

No!

不是！

So it’s for your own pleasure..

所以～ 是為了你自己開心

............

............

That’s gross man..

老兄～ 很噁心耶

Yah dude, it is kind of gross.

對呀老兄，真的有點噁心

Gross.. Gross.. Gross!!!!!!

噁心！噁心！噁心！！！

What? There’s a bug in my corn.

幹嘛？玉米裡有蟲

Okay, so you have fun and take off your pants right here. I’ll see you on the bus.

好吧，你一個人在這脫褲子好好享受我們遊覽車上見

NUMBER THREE- BE PREPARED

第三招做好萬全準備

Okay, syue di. To pass this stage, you need to take off your pants.

好的，學弟，要過這關你得脫掉褲子

What? Why don’t you take off your pants?

什麼？那你幹嘛不自己脫？

Oh.. you chicken?

噢～ 你是膽小雞嗎？

Well in fact I am.. “Chicken” (Rooster) is my zodiac sign.

我就是啊～ 我屬雞

Why? You don’t dare to take off your pants first? You chicken?

幹嘛？你不敢先脫喔？你是～ 膽小雞嗎？

No, I’m not. I’m eagle!

我才不是！我是大鵰！

That’s not even in the 12 zodiacs, man!

十二生肖哪有鵰？

Oh, sorry!

是喔，真抱歉

You chicken?

你不敢嗎？

Okay, you take off your pants if I take off mine! I dare you!

來啊！我脫了你就脫！我賭你不敢！

“Who pa who?”

誰怕誰

That’s not English.

那又不是英文

Whatever!

隨便啦！

Okay, maybe we’re over-exaggerating a bit. But you get the point.

好啦，我們是有點誇張，但你懂的

Like you wouldn’t show how much money you got in your personal wallet.

就像你不會讓別人看你皮夾裡有多少錢

You got all these passwords for your smartphones and your laptops, so that only people you trust and that people you allow to can see.

你給手機、筆電上了一堆密碼只讓你相信且允許的人可以看見

So how much more valuable is this?

那 「這」又是多麼更有價值呢！

Not the T-shirt.

不是T-shirt

This.

這個

Your body.

你的身體

Aren’t you way more valuable than your wallets, your purses, your laptops, your smartphones?

「你」難道沒有比你的皮夾、錢包、筆電、 手機更有價值嗎？

Are you sure you’re gonna show off your body to people you barely know?

你確定你要對你幾乎不認識的人秀出你的身體？

People respect other people who respect themselves.

人們會尊重那些懂得尊重自己的人

Wow, that was kind of twisty.

哇嗚～ 有點饒舌

But, it’s true!

但，是真的！

So you don’t have to do whatever you’re told to.

所以，你不需要對別人唯命是從

Especially if it’s something that makes you feel uncomfortable.

特別是如果某件事情讓你感到不舒服

And just know that “this,” your body, is very precious,

你要知道「這個」你的身體很珍貴

and you should treat it that way.

而你應該要很珍惜地對待它

Son, take off your pants!

兒子，脫褲子！

Mom, I was just talking about this! You can’t just tell people to take off their pants!

媽！我才正在講這件事！你不可以這樣隨便叫別人脫褲子啦！

Do you want me to do your laundry or not?

你到底要不要我幫你洗衣服？

[Music]

（音樂）